Tried a Chuck Norris "Total Gym" today.

[madmanmike]

how much does this thing cost???

 

[Ian Coe]

madmanmike-I represent everyone I feel on this board when I say, and from the heart


DIE DIE DIE DIE

 

[rfells]

How much was it???

 

[magicman531]

See what you've started Chad!! Why oh why cruel world?!?!!?

 

[Ravener]

 

[Ian Coe]

look at those acting skills



WAR CHUCK NORRIS

 

[Lusst]

When Chuck jumps into a pool, he doesn't get wet. No...the pool gets Chuck Norris.

 

[flak]

In Soviet Union, Chuck Norris not roundhouse kick you -- you get roundhouse kicked by Chuck Norris.

-- Yakov Smirnov, seconds before his death by roundhouse kick, Branson, Missouri, 1998.

 

[$uperman]

edit.

 

[lukinakai]

The Bible is a shortened version of one of Chuck Norris' catch phrases.

 

[Lusst]

The Bible is a shortened version of one of Chuck Norris' catch phrases.

LMAO - haven't heard that one yet...

 

[Ian Coe]

make sure you have a history on someone to tell a chuck norris's tears heal cancer joke to.......lets say I said it to the wrong person last year


*cough*

 

[Lusst]

make sure you have a history on someone to tell a chuck norris's tears heal cancer joke to.......lets say I said it to the wrong person last year


*cough*

I said the same thing to someone...only it was about me having AIDS. The bad part was that the dude's father died of AIDS a couple years before.

:redface: :redface: :redface:

 

[Chris Beeby]

Which is why it's good to stay away from disease jokes. Except herpes. Herpes, is always funny.

 

[enright3060]

Speaking of herpes

*** clears throat ***

Does anyone find those valtrex ads fucking hilarious? I did not think it was possible to glorify herpes, but after seeing their ad campaign I wanted to have wild herpes sex (then I thought about getting herpes and changed my mind). Why? The people in those commercials look where having so much fun and the women where so damn hot. And, of course, they where having fun; valtrex has made each person's life care-free. They can now have wild, dirty, guilt free herpes sex.

 

[blakethemus]

People pay me to give them herpies these days

 

[XJ3B]

Chuck Norris once walked down the street with an erection.

There were no survivors.

 

[juanlawnmower]

Thanks for the resurrection on this one buddy.

 

[Lusst]

Thanks for the resurrection on this one buddy.

Chuck Norris' tears can resurrect...the...dead.


Fuck it.

 

[lukinakai]

Chuck Norris is the only man to ever beat a brick wall in a game of squash.