Tried a Chuck Norris "Total Gym" today.

[killer_kicks88]

If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the heck down.

 

[killer_kicks88]

Chuck Norris could have any woman he wants, but he has never had sex. He only masturbates because the only person good enough to have sex with Chuck is Chuck.

 

[killer_kicks88]

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.

 

[killer_kicks88]

Chuck Norris' hand is the only hand that can beat a royal flush.

 

[Wrecking Ball]

If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds till." After you ask, "Two seconds to what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.

 

[Sherddog]

I thought i might save time and post all the chuck norris jokes, there might e some repeats.

there are alot.


- Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

-Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest. Chuck Norris won by 5.

- Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.

-Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

-Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.


-Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order
are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

-The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.

-If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't
see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.

-Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop
the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets
with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.

-Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks
and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction
was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took
his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and
admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.

-To prove it isn't that big of a deal to beat cancer. Chuck Norris
smoked 15 cartons of cigarettes a day for 2 years and aquired 7 different
kinds of cancer only to rid them from his body by flexing for 30 minutes.
Beat that, Lance Armstrong.

-Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers
the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

-When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

-A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied,
"Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of
his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only
thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.

-Chuck Norris once saw a

 

[ghostwipe]

Way to screw it up, noob. It's more fun when people post their favorites one by one.

 

[Nanthony]

Way to screw it up, noob. It's more fun when people post their favorites one by one.

I bet Chuck Norris could fix that.

 

[-V-MuayThai-V-]

I thought i might save time and post all the chuck norris jokes, there might e some repeats.

there are alot.


- Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

-Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest. Chuck Norris won by 5.

- Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.

-Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

-Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.


-Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order
are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

-The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.

-If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't
see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.

-Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop
the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets
with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.

-Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks
and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction
was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took
his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and
admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.

-To prove it isn't that big of a deal to beat cancer. Chuck Norris
smoked 15 cartons of cigarettes a day for 2 years and aquired 7 different
kinds of cancer only to rid them from his body by flexing for 30 minutes.
Beat that, Lance Armstrong.

-Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers
the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

-When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

-A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied,
"Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of
his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only
thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.

-Chuck Norris once saw a

 

[killer_kicks88]

urban, delete post...fuckin chuck norris

 

[Numpty]

Chuck Norris invented the c section when he punched his way out of the womb.

 

[killer_kicks88]

Chuck Norris' beard has it's own birthday... it's everyday that ends in "Y"...
Contrary to popular belief, Jesus wasn't killed by the jews, he just couldn't bear the thought of having a beard as good as Chuck Norris...
Soda never fizzes for Chuck Norris... it just gets excited...

 

[Wrecking Ball]

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

On another note, posting all those Chuck jokes has pissed me off more than any spoiler, ever. BAN I say!

 

[peanut butter]

and that's the bottom line........coz chuck norris said so

 

[Wild Dan Hibiki]

chuck norris can power up a large city by creating statice energy from touching his beard

 

[mjfan12]

I had a Total gym when I was 12.

I was fat, and in crappy shape. and even then I got to the max settings in a couple of weeks.
it barely has any resistance its a POS.



ROTFLMAO @ chuck norris jokes.

 

[Lusst]

Chuck Norris threw the cup at Ron Artest.

 

[Snot_Rocket]

chuck norris had relations with that women

 

[Chad Hamilton]

Please don't break out the ban.

I swear I didn't know.

 

[BackBrainKick]

Chuck Norris' favorite Chuck joke is any joke making you think about Chuck Norris