I Have Been Feeling Suicidal Lately

Everybody has thought about it at one point in their life and you're not alone. There are people out there who care about and love you. You wouldn't be just ending your life you would be ruining the lives of your loved ones. Please try to get help. Depression is a mere chemical imbalance, try to tough it out. You can beat your head. Whether it's medication or accomplishing achievements. Speaking for my-self it will pass.
 
Do you know the root cause?
 
Jim said:
I feel there is a distinction between wanting to commit suicide and having a plan of action to make suicide a reality. You should see a doctor and check into a mental institution until this ideation regresses. Life is too valuable to take. Think of all of those people that die from cancer and illness each day that would give anything to alive.
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While I'm empathetic, I'm also jealous that they have the desire/will to live, which I seem to have been born lacking. They likely have derived much more pleasure out of their lives.
 
MikeHolmes said:
While I'm empathetic, I'm also jealous that they have the desire/will to live, which I seem to have been born lacking. They likely have derived much more pleasure out of their lives.
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This is a very profound statement MikeHolmes, the human condition summed up in one sentence, 'empathy versus jealousy', both felt at the same time. I dont mean to sound condescending but you have a level of self awareness that a lot of people would not have or at least be able to admit.
Pleasure is not a word id use to describe happiness tho, pleasure is fleeting, contentedness i find much more apt. Self awareness is a key component of being content. Knowing who we are and being able to accept that is so important in life, being aware that were good and bad, dark and bright, strong and sometimes weak.
 
I'm not a huge fan of the mechanism we were born into either, but there's no real point in checking out early. You'll be dead eventually, so you're fretting over what is merely temporary. You might as well hang around despite it. Perhaps you'll find something of interest during your journey and the tide will turn. If not, at least you'll have been too iron-willed to do the Reaper's work for him.
 
cable guy said:
This is a very profound statement MikeHolmes, the human condition summed up in one sentence, 'empathy versus jealousy', both felt at the same time. I dont mean to sound condescending but you have a level of self awareness that a lot of people would not have or at least be able to admit.
Pleasure is not a word id use to describe happiness tho, pleasure is fleeting, contentedness i find much more apt. Self awareness is a key component of being content. Knowing who we are and being able to accept that is so important in life, being aware that were good and bad, dark and bright, strong and sometimes weak.
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I don't have a very vast vocabulary, but contentment is likely what I am jealous about others having more than I. I am constantly picking at myself and hating myself for little things, yet people seem to just accept themselves. I have often hated people with big egos, but that's likely because I am envious. Not that I want to be an egotistical douchebag, but they aren't struggling with their heads like I am all the time.
 
Overpressure said:
I actually work with suicidal patients.
Please see a counselor.
Life is awesome but when you're ready for it.

The internet isn't where the help will be, you have to see trained clinicians who know about this stuff.
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this this this this. Ts please go see your doctor and try and get some proper help and counseling.
 
Mike Holmes, are you also Mike the Army Quitter guy?

Whatever shitty feelings you have now, it will pass with time and help. The only thing suicide accomplishes, is to place your burden on your loved ones.
 
Work out at a gym frequently, not only for medical benefits but also to do something where you can leave your thoughts behind for a bit. I felt suicidal for half a year last year and working out has helped with my spirits.

Look at your life and see what may be right and wrong.

Also go see a therapist, not only for counselling for your depression but also to see if there are any underlying medical causes, like clinical depression, adhd etc...
 
First of all, all things are
temporary. We are all visitors
here... and suffering is a
part of life. Happiness is
inevitable, even if only in
moments...

Don't keep it a secret.
tell someone you love or
someone you could be
honest with.

Outside of that, I don't know
your situation or circumstances
but I'm guessing you aren't a
third world slave laborer or
child ridden with cancer. So
maybe make time out of your
early day for deliberate structure.
Exercise like your life depends
on it. Cardio like dos anjos.
Strength training like lombard.
I find that it helps to quiet my
mind & it makes for easier
navigation through my capricious
emotions. But I still wouldn't be
shit without the love in my life.
So never stop sharing & connecting.
Volunteer if you have to... structure....
 
don't do it bro.

most people suffer from varying degrees or intensities of clinical depression. one way I guess I "kicked" mine was to start trail running and biking. get a good playlist on your IPOD, find a good trail, and in my opinion it does wonders. IMHO the good lord never meant for us to be indoors looking at computers in what basically constitutes slavery for most of us because most of us (me included) hate our jobs which is one to two thirds of our adult lives. Add to that bad relationships and yeah life can start to suck real fast.

anyway here's a link that states being in nature can lower blood pressure and have a positive affect on mood.

http://www.americanscientist.org/issues/pub/a-walk-in-the-woods

Also feel free to PM me.
 
While I am knowledgeable of the fact that there are many others in this world with worse life situations, I am also aware that I would just take the suicide route in their situations, so they have something that I do not have. That awareness makes me feel worse. My desire to live through adversity is virtually non-existent, yet normal people are seemingly born with it.
 
The most powerful thing in life is the power of choice.

Literally everything in your life (past, present, or future) is a culmination of small choices built up over time. Although you may not always have full control over every situation, you can CHOOSE how you react to them.

Here's what I'm saying. You're not happy with your life, right Mike? Choose a different path. You have the power to do whatever you want that makes you happy, you just have to be decisive and make the choice to change.

I'd be willing to bet, if you were making a ton of money, traveling the world, or spending your days swimming in spoon, you'd feel a lot better, right? So, the best way to get over this funk you're in is to make the choice, right now, to devise a plan to do just that. THEN make the choice to execute the plan.

I'm telling you, it will work, and your life will be awesome.
 
MikeHolmes said:
I don't have a very vast vocabulary, but contentment is likely what I am jealous about others having more than I. I am constantly picking at myself and hating myself for little things, yet people seem to just accept themselves. I have often hated people with big egos, but that's likely because I am envious. Not that I want to be an egotistical douchebag, but they aren't struggling with their heads like I am all the time.
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You have a decent vocabulary, and you express yourself very well. This is very important as language gives us the means to express ourselves and get thoughts and feelings out of our heads. However some things, some feelings are beyond language.
If you dont mind id like to pick up on one thing you said that jumped out at me, ' I am constantly picking at myself and hating myself for little things'. You said 'little things'. Little things are only important if we give them great importance. Your a rational person and by even mentioning this i suspect that on some level you realise that your giving these little things more importance than they deserve?
your depression really doesnt help, as you said you have struggled with depression for a long time and its like a big anvil you have to carry around. Behind the depression you have a logical mind, your rational and you might not believe me but your a lot more rational than these people with big egos. Inflated egos are like baloons- it only takes a small pin to burst it, real strength comes through experience and turning suffering into knowledge. If you get through this you can get through anything
 
Life is too short to kill yourself. If we lived for 10,000 years I could understand, but we don't even get 100 most of the time. Try to figure out a way to make your remaining time worth it to you. Don't spend it beating yourself up, you are better than that.
 
Peteyandjia said:
Life is too short to kill yourself. If we lived for 10,000 years I could understand, but we don't even get 100 most of the time. Try to figure out a way to make your remaining time worth it to you. Don't spend it beating yourself up, you are better than that.
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There's not a woman worth killing yourself over. Hell, nobody is worth that.
Remember that 90% of the shit we worry over never happens.

Finish the race, whatever your place.
I meet too many people that considered suicide, or even tried, and went on to live great lives.
 
Dude please go see a professional. I went through what sounds like a very similar situation about two years ago, and tried to kill myself. A coworker found me in my apartment and managed to get me back to conciousness. I quit my job, moved away, and have never been happier. Literally never been happier. Now I am traveling the world while taking odd jobs I never even knew existed lol. You can't just run though, you will need a plan. I needed to escape my environment and day to day grind to even begin to level out much less progess.

I am willing to share way more via PM if you want, but PLEASE pick up the phone right now (not in five minutes, not in two minutes, but right fucking now) and dial this number: 1-800-273-8255

That is the suicide hotline number. It is available 24/7, toll-free, and completely anonymous. Best wishes man, I can't make your choice for you but I can promise you that you are not alone in feeling like you do and it is 100% fixable.
 
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