Rabbit Hole Tavern- A safe place to complain about your In-Laws (AKA the ode to Jeff7b9 Thread)

toasty

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They always tell you that you marry the whole family.....but if you really knew what that meant there would be a lot less marrying going on.....

My wife's friends call her Marilyn Munster, meaning she was the normal one in the family.

And I genuinely like my in-laws in small doses, like half a day tops, but extended time with them is not my friend.

While not a full on hoarder my mother in law has an awful lot of old useless shit that has been through 2 or 3 floods and will likely killer her one day if she tries to plug any of it in or use any of it for any purpose at all. she get angry and defensive if you say things like "maybe that black moldy sheetrock should get thrown away" and will tell you how some of it is still good and she is going to use it to fix ______ but ____ never gets fixed. she will also tell you the history of where that moldy sheetrock came from "I got that when Gary was fixing up the vacant house down the block after the flood of 2002, so you know the provenance of the piece. I sometime think I'll see her standing on line on the Antique Roadshow holding that black moldy sheetrock hoping it will appraise for $100,000 or more.

her brothers don't have a dime between them but have 3 divorces but 2 really huge and expensive tricked out trucks that are the sum of their entire wealth. This would not be so bad but one of them has a truly gifted kid who is gonna need college money and instead of saving for that, the 1 is having the interior of his truck redone with what little he actually has.

The sister is nice enough but adds 1 to the divorce total, as does the mom, and has a tendency to just not show up for family functions because she's too hungover.

Also, 1 brother who was staying with us with his new girlfriend, comes up to me very early one freezing winter morning and says "Do you have a shovel?' I natually ask, "WTH do you need a shovel for? He couldn't wait for the bathroom and instead of knocking to say he had an emergency could I get out of the shower or just using it while I'm showering, he decided to take a shit in my backyard. i was thrilled that my neighbor, a very protective father of a young daughter with excellent sight lines into my backyard did not come a calling that morning. Then decide it was a good idea to tell his new girlfriend, who seemed nice, about his adventure. that relationship did not last long.

They seem to all resent my wife for having a steady job, money she earned and saved, and a stable marriage to a greater or lesser degree depending on how their own lives are going.

None of them ever says anything like "you know marrying a girl I'd only know for a few weeks from partying with her and who doesn't speak english, and had no job and left her kids in her home country, might not be the best idea I ever had"......"or having seen my older brother marry someone with a clear drug and alcohol problem might have been a clue that I shouldn't do the same and then have multiple kids with him between break ups and cheating and DUI's."

No they seem truly shocked anew each time a bad decision turns into a worse outcome.

The ticking time bomb in my life is my mother in-law is getting older and decrepit and being depressive and in love with discussing her own misery, is doing nothing to fix it or at least stave it off. So at some point she will not be able to live alone.........The financial burden will fall on us as will the care burden but the brothers, who have "borrowed" money off her every time shit hit the fame, will have fuck all to help and if they had fuck all they'd spend it on some spinning rims instead of helping anyway...

life, it be not fair.

yours?
 
Timing on this is pretty funny.

My wife's father died 25 years ago, and I have been editing together some video footage she had of him from her old family videos.

Dude was pretty cool.
Went to Woodstock.
Had fun and also was a good father and family man.

And he only ever knew me as a teenage kid trying (successfully) to fuck his daughter.
<{Ray1}>
Which is a shame.
I think we would have gotten along pretty well.

_________________________

So I don't so much blame my wife's mom for being an old grouchy cunt. She has a pretty good excuse.

But good lord is the prick she remarried a fucking pain in the arse. I honestly believe he has aspergers disorder, which my wife agrees is a pretty accurate assessment. Dude has no ability to read social cues.

God bless them if they want to be miserable together. But they are my kids grandparents and my wife's mom and legally attached dickhead.
So I can't escape them.

Around peak covid insanity, they gave me the best gift I ever could have received from them, the gift of not having to continue pretending to like them.

And for that I am thankful.
<RomeroSalute>
 
Every time I see mother inlaw she always complains about how I asked her daughter to marry me without asking her permission first n how disrespectful it was. (In law is a chineese woman born HK) . Granted I was only 25 at time n still a kid mentally and maybe I should of but FFS 25 years later I'm still hearing it every time.
 
I impregnated their unwed teenage daughter. I fired the first shot!

Been the best Grandparents in the World to their Grandkids. My MIL is cut from the same cloth as the Granny on TikTok with the Nerf Guns. Recovering from a car accident right now, and at 92 and 87 I'm worried about 'em.
 
Sorry brah but cant imagine anything with Carrot as the star doesnt likely taste like shit. No offense just repulsed by carrots
It is a not so subtle joke that jumped threads from the spouse thread to the in-laws thread.

Well played @emefer I tip my left ear to you as a sign of respect.
 
I am in the weird position of having both my in-laws and my mother living in my house. The in-laws are in an in-law apartment, and I gave my mom the basement.

Already seeing the effects of becoming your parents parents as they age.
 
I am in the weird position of having both my in-laws and my mother living in my house. The in-laws are in an in-law apartment, and I gave my mom the basement.

Already seeing the effects of becoming your parents parents as they age.
You at least make em pull their weight?
 
I actually feel bad for my soon to be ex in law. She was an abuse victim and as a result is clinically depressed. No friends, no hobbies, never smiles or shows any emotion, always negative. Her daughter (my soon to be ex wife) started to acquire those behaviors after we got married.

Feel bad for both of them but I can't fix them. Neither wants to admit that there's an issue.
 
You at least make em pull their weight?
Of course. It's a must since we live in a nice neighborhood and like not having to worry about crime for the most part. I work, mom still works, mom in law gets a pension, the old man is 94 and retired. He's the only free ride.
 
Of course. It's a must since we live in a nice neighborhood and like not having to worry about crime for the most part. I work, mom still works, mom in law gets a pension, the old man is 94 and retired. He's the only free ride.
Bless ya brah . I would unload a bullet to my dome if forced to live more thsn 2 week with inlaws
 
Every time I see mother inlaw she always complains about how I asked her daughter to marry me without asking her permission first n how disrespectful it was. (In law is a chineese woman born HK) . Granted I was only 25 at time n still a kid mentally and maybe I should of but FFS 25 years later I'm still hearing it every time.
Not your fault... your wife-to-be should have briefed you about this back in the day if it really mattered...
 
Not your fault... your wife-to-be should have briefed you about this back in the day if it really mattered...
Yeah but she kinda did .. she mentioned a few times how her mom was old school and I needed to . But she was always laughing when she said it so I figured it was a joke or wasn't important. So i dismissed as un important. Joke was on me as I still pay for it a few times a year like clockwork.
 
Moral of the story, you gotta wash your fruits and veggies

Not just on account of pesticides, which is reason enough for me...

But also because... you don't know where that carrot might have been, and maybe the farmer or twisted minded tweaker in the grocery store was getting into some butt stuff.

xh7rwywi8fm51 (1).jpg


And I know you may be thinking

48f8f40f-0ac7-4be1-8e72-49ee1eec13c3_text (1).gif

But sometimes... it is.
 
In-laws came over for dinner the other day. Said my carrot soufflé tasted like shit. Fuck them.

Sorry brah but cant imagine anything with Carrot as the star doesnt likely taste like shit. No offense just repulsed by carrots

It is a not so subtle joke that jumped threads from the spouse thread to the in-laws thread.

Well played @emefer I tip my left ear to you as a sign of respect.



Moral of the story, you gotta wash your fruits and veggies



Not just on account of pesticides, which is reason enough for me...



But also because... you don't know where that carrot might have been, and maybe the farmer or twisted minded tweaker in the grocery store was getting into some butt stuff.

xh7rwywi8fm51 (1).jpg


And I know you may be thinking


48f8f40f-0ac7-4be1-8e72-49ee1eec13c3_text (1).gif

But sometimes... it is.
 

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Why is this off the front page?

I'm not even close to finished complaining about my in laws!

I just spoke to the wife, brainstorming if we can get any help from relatives during the near future when I am supposed to be resting from major shoulder surgery.

My mom- volunteering and asking me what she can do to help, and already helping by driving my kids to some of their activities, or by coming over and doing chores like dishes, laundry, helping my kids with homework... the woman is a saint.

In laws- going away for 2 weeks and leaving their dog with us so we have 24/7 dog chaos, chasing eachother, dog wrestling, barking, etc. Thanks Nana.
 
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