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Best bud might be losing his mind.

When talking to him, it might be best to present your thoughts as questions:
"You've made a lot of really big moves recently. Is there something going on?"
"She seems [great/really sweet/like a real ball buster (be respectful but honest in your opinion)] what was it about her that made you rush to lock it down? And vice versa, really? I love ya, man, but I ain't marrying you after a month."
"House, wedding, project car; you're all about big commitments all of a sudden, huh?"

Stuff like that. You want him to think about it but telling him to think about it probably isn't going to work. If he's full speed ahead and you jump in front of him from the side, you're going to get trucked. If you can steer him out of bounds, it gives a chance to reset and re-evaluate.
 
This doesnt really sound like mental unstability to me.

More like a guy whos just making bad decisions

Really the only thing here thats alarming is the girl. I would meet her and form my own opinion before talking to him. I think you are over reacting here and jumping to conclusions because of his father
 
You could accidently hit him with your car. Give him some time in the hospital to re-assess.
 
Shit, this is serious @HTTR21
IMO you should express your concern that they only know each other for a month and nothing else. Don't talk about the house, car, BP... nothing else. You can't make him upset or angry otherwise he'll just push you away. If this was my friend I would suggest to him to go out and travel before getting married. Really, there's no better way to know someone than traveling together, spending full days with that person and sharing every second together. Traveling together is a fucking test for any relationship (don't tell him that though, you don't want to make him scared). Tell him that they need to know each other better and develop a better sense of what marriage and intimacy is, and that a trip will simulate this even if it's not a typical routine. This will also give her a chance to reevaluate things and perhaps, if he's really maniac, to freak out.

Now, about him being BP, you know what you described doesn't sound good.... Him being highly impulsive is a red flag for sure. You need to speak with his family about that. You guys needs to work together and be smart without pushing him away. I would suggest you guys to go see a therapist and ask for an advice on how to speak and deal with him.
 
HTTR21 said:
My best friend's dad tried killing himself about two years ago due to his mental illness going unchecked. (He's Bipolar.) Now males generally don't start showing signs of this until they're around 23-25 years old. Well he just turned 25.

Anyhoo, I recently bought a piece of property and about a two months later, he decided to buy his own house. It was very impulsive because he didn't even go through our mutual friend who is a real estate agent. He looked at a total of four houses and just made his decision. No big deal, I didn't think anything of it. I congratulated him and let him know that it was super awesome. I didn't think this was impulsive until you factor in a few more things that happened here recently.

Homie decided to purchase a 2004 Mustang Cobra. That's badass. It needs a lot of work done to it but nothing too serious. This didn't worry me at all but he sent me a text out of the blue a couple nights ago that made me literally say "What the fuck!?"

I just found out that I'm going to be the best man at his wedding. He's getting married to a chick he met off of tinder a month ago. The shit is fucking crazy. He said he started dating her because her profile said Christian. I then ask him whens the big date and he tells me November 10th of this year.... I'm at a loss for words and he's talking about putting her name on the house too...

Now I'm torn. I want to be happy for him but this is just way too wild and I don't believe in coincidences. I'm starting to think he's having an extreme high manic episode. We're going to grab some beer over the weekend and I don't know if I should voice my concern. I don't wanna step on his toes and I feel like I can't be the only one who is seeing this as extreme.

What do you guys think? I've been getting a lot of people's opinions on this because like I said I don't wanna step on his toes but I don't wanna call him crazy.

Cliffs:
-Best friend's dad is bipolar and tried committing suicide two years ago.

-My friend is now at the age where Bipolar starts to show.

-Bought a piece of property a couple month after me

-Bought a 2004 Cobra right after purchasing the house

-Got engaged to a girl he met off a Tinder a month ago and has only lived with her for 6 days.

-Going to meet with him over the weekend and I'm wondering if I should voice my concern because this is way too extreme when you put everything together.I think he's having a manic episode.

<escalate99>
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I’m extremely disappointed in this thread
I thought it would be about you and mtgs
However, talk to ya boy if concerned
Might tread lightly tho
 
Sounds like he's a ticking time bomb.
 
sniper said:
Womens incredible need for attention and affection are their biggest weakness, IMO

But when it's a man that needs it.... it's a lost cause. He'll never hear a word you say. He needs a woman to feel complete. Scary shit, IMO
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Yeah there ain't any talking a dude like that down. He "knows" she's the one, and anything you say to talk him out of it is probably just gonna piss him off.
 
So you think he is bi-polar too? Has he had the lows? any depressive episodes?

Edit: I read your post about his depressive episodes.


Man I am sorry to hear that I had some bouts of manic depressive episodes and I can say once the highs" have passed it feels like your life is over and if that marriage ends up a big disapointment it can really send him down a very deep depresive episode.


This is tough
 
punky brewster said:
And if you do decide to have 'the talk' with him, try to be diplomatic. Don't start out with "I'm concerned about you, you're exhibiting signs that your father did, etc.....". Start out with "Wow, gettin' married huh? That was fast, you sure you ready for this ride, buddy?"
Click to expand...

I came in her to say this. If you're going to talk to him about it make it casual. Don't go out for drinks and start having some serious conversation no guy wants to hear that shit. Don't come off like your judging him and shit like that only makes people get defensive.
 
ShinkanPo said:
So you think he is bi-polar too? Has he had the lows? any depressive episodes?
Click to expand...

Yeah. Its been awhile though.

HTTR21 said:
I've seen him go through short bouts of depression when we were younger. Its probably been maybe a year since his last one. He said something a long the lines of he can't even find the energy to watch TV or read a book. He stopped going to the gym with for a while too during that phase.
Click to expand...
 
Tell him to join a BJJ class
 
Fraz said:
Tell him to join a BJJ class
Click to expand...

He's always disliked grappling because he's like a fish out of water on the mat. He loves Muay Thai though. That's a great idea. We got a pretty solid gym here too.
 
That sucks man. Hopefully you can find a great way to communicate with him to express your concerns. I have a friend, not that close with him, but he is very close to my cousin. Lately he started acting wierd as hell on FB. Prior to that he was doing good (I think). Married with a daughter, owned a yogurt shop (Thanks to his parents that own businesses). Found out later he got divorced. Ex and kid moved back to Korea. Anyway my cousin suspects he has schizophrenia or some type of psych condition. He's also trying to figure out how to talk to him about it. This past 2 weeks though I notice him posting again on FB and Instagram and he appears to be acting a little more normal. Not sure if he already got help for what was going on or if he was just having some type of breakdown or maybe even something drug induced. Hopefully it was something acute and not a chronic psych issue.
 
Fuck his fiancee. It might end your friendship but there's a good chance he won't marry her and also doesn't mater, had sex.
 
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