You know you're fat when...

[John Stockton]

when you'd rather take the elevator than walk a flight or two of stairs.

I have a fourth floor rule when it comes to elevators.

 

[odog]

When you go to buy a belt and realize they don't sell them in your size.

 

[CardonaLJ**]

when you order an everything bagel with cream cheese and bacon.

but its so delicious

 

[MarloStanfield]

not sure if anyones seen those bathroom scales that talk to you, tell you your weight and shit, well she was that fat when she got on to weigh herself the scales said "one person at a time"

 

[HIMBOB]

When you start assessing chairs for structual integrity.

When you will drive around the block again because that parking space was just too damn far away.

When can't remember the last time you walked a mile all in one go.

When your thighs make a noise when you walk.

When I was doing lots of weights this used to happen to me, and I never even got very big.
(I am not fat but I like look like I should be.)

 

[Youthanized]

You know you're fat when you skip breakfast to justify eating for the next ten hours.

You know you're fat when you buy a celebratory cake to celebrate cake.

When you bleed syrup.

 

[Det Kimble]

when you tell people you arent fat youre something else less hurtful but still the same thing as being fat

"Curvy."

 

[SafyreSchool**]

-someone asks if you "you jelly?" and they mean it literally.

-you step on a scale and it reads "Dear God, get the fuck off of me!" and it's an analogue scale.

-half the foods in your diet regime end with the words "on a stick."

-your main vehicle for transportation is a John Deere.

 

[Captain Davis]

When you go to buy a belt and realize they don't sell them in your size.

And you're forced to wear suspenders.

 

[TriangleMan]

When you look down and you feel that double chin. Freshman 25 during college for the MAJOR loss

 

[Captain Davis]

You have to call in sick to work because you can't fit through the door. You have to call in fat.

 

[KyleInAction]

You know you're fat when you skip breakfast to justify eating for the next ten hours.

Done it. "Oh, we're going near the food trucks today? I'll just have some fruit before work."

 

[Captain Davis]

You can no longer tuck in your shirt.

 

[Groundswell]

The stewardess asks you to move seats in order to balance the weight of the plane before takeoff.

 

[SafyreSchool**]

The stewardess asks you to move seats in order to balance the weight of the plane before takeoff.

Every time you book a flight, people think NASA is transporting the space shuttle again.

 

[weed]

when you bang your own fold

 

[Stargazer Rex]

You get tired having sex.

 

[JohnnyDrama]

You know your fat when you have to have an amusement park attendant push the safety belt down across your lap.... for one click...

 

[NorCalNinja]

You get more excited by a Philly Cheese than Philly chics.

 

[Captain Davis]

You can't cut your own toe nails.