Social WAR ROOM LOUNGE V29: Unsanctioned street threadmaking, Colosseum style (now with preferred spelling)

[Gregolian]

Yes I'm salty that Canada has a monarch.

I thought that was a bad South Park joke.... wtf

 

[Clippy]

 

[Clippy]

 

[Prokofievian]

I thought that was a bad South Park joke.... wtf

All of our MPs have to swear allegiance to the crown. It's fucking retarded. The purpose of the Monarch is to be the ''personification'' of Canada and its constitution. I have seen grown adult functioning human beings argue that we couldn't even conceivably just swear an allegiance to the constitution and people of Canada.

...like, we all have to make fucking believe that someone can be a ''personification'' of a fucking document, and that just swearing to uphold what it says is just not good enough.

 

[Gregolian]

All of our MPs have to swear allegiance to the crown. It's fucking retarded. The purpose of the Monarch is to be the ''personification'' of Canada and its constitution. I have seen grown adult functioning human beings argue that we couldn't even conceivably just swear an allegiance to the constitution and people of Canada.

...like, we all have to make fucking believe that someone can be a ''personification'' of a fucking document, and that just swearing to uphold what it says is just not good enough.

That's insane.

To be fair, I've always found it insane that you guys, Australia, and New Zealand still have the fucking queen on their money.

 

[Higus]

FYI, this is the Proud Conservative / Trump Supporter that got caught trying to pay women to make up rape accusations against Robert Mueller. Oh, and he has 182,000 followers.

That whole ordeal was a surreal shit show. You have to see the press conference with him and his lawyer. They scheduled a conference in a Holiday Inn to introduce this woman to the media, but by the time it was supposed to happen, it was already debunked. They carried through with it anyway and it was embarrassing.

 

[Higus]

Has anyone made a thread about Wells Fargo appearing to be collapsing?

Or the New Jersey rain tax?

I think I remember a thread on the NJ rain tax. It was stupid because the OP thought it was a literal tax on rain. People pointed out that it was actually a tax to help pay for water water utilities or something, but the usual suspects joined in and doubled down on the idiocy.

 

[Gregolian]

I think I remember a thread on the NJ rain tax. It was stupid because the OP thought it was a literal tax on rain. People pointed out that it was actually a tax to help pay for water water utilities or something, but the usual suspects joined in and doubled down on the idiocy.

In our state it's illegal to collect rainwater for like, even a personal garden without a permit.....

 

[Unknown Pleasures]

That whole ordeal was a surreal shit show. You have to see the press conference with him and his lawyer. They scheduled a conference in a Holiday Inn to introduce this woman to the media, but by the time it was supposed to happen, it was already debunked. They carried through with it anyway and it was embarrassing.

Was there like a Q and A? And a video?

 

[senri]

In our state it's illegal to collect rainwater for like, even a personal garden without a permit.....

I can build a garden for you in your backyard Mr. Gregolian. Permits won't be an issue, I can assure you. What's your address?

 

[Higus]

In our state it's illegal to collect rainwater for like, even a personal garden without a permit.....

Kind of a non-sequitor...
I think the reason behind the law was because there were some individuals who were collecting enormous amounts of water, like making a lake on their property or something, to the point where it was having an impact on the surrounding environment.

 

[HockeyBjj]

If the cocaine falling from the sky could stop that'd be great.

I don't mind the snow at all. It's the freezing rain that's creating havoc.

Today, it's 32 degrees and we've got some mist coming down on the 4 inches of snow we got last night. It's supposed to cool down throughout the day and that most will form a frozen layer on top of the snow. My city has a salt shortage so only main roads get salt. Residential will ice rinks, and all they can do is warn us that that indeed will happen and we need to be careful

This is what needs to end

 

[Higus]

Was there like a Q and A? And a video?

https://dealbreaker.com/2018/11/we-...r-and-it-was-everything-wed-hoped-it-would-be

We Went To Jacob Wohl's Most Important Press Conference Ever And It Was Everything We'd Hoped It Would Be
When we left our quiet, comfortable home in the pre-dawn darkness to drive alone to Washington DC this morning, we did so with the solitary hope the eventual reward would warrant our sacrifice.

Oh, how it did.

Awaiting us hours down I-95 was the promise of a press conference being hosted by our old pal Jacob Wohl and some MAGA DC lawyer that he's pulled into his latest vainglorious venture: becoming a global private eye hellbent on destroying prosecutor Robert Mueller. According to Jacob's pre-sale, he was going to present a victim of sexual assault who would claim that her abuser was none other than Mueller himself. Our boy Jacob was going to show her off to the assembled press at a Holiday Inn in Arlington, VA, thus ending the long investigation into his adopted daddy, President Donald Trump.

We had spent the previous day watching Jacob's whole plan unravel in the most JacobWohlian way possible. The investigation firm that he claimed had contacted him out of the blue turned out to be yet another of his adorable shell companies with a web registration bearing his email and a listed phone number that rang back to his mom's cell. He had also apparently forgotten to update the photo template on the website he fabricated, leaving up bio headshots of famous actors and models, stock photo faces, and of course, his own head. The whole thing was very cute and dumb and totally what we've come to expect from Jacob over the years.

What we didn't expect though, was just how utterly fucking shambolic the whole presser would be once we finally arrived at the Rosslyn Holiday Inn. It took us a while to find the conference room that Jacob and his pal Jack Burkman had reserved from 11am to 2pm but would only use from noon to almost 1. It was in an almost corner of the bizarre building and once found, the defining feature was a litany of water pitchers laid out on a rumpled tablecloth. By 11:30, the room consisted of about 8 people. Wohl and Burkman rolled in around 11:40, and Jacob sat up front, preparing - we assume - for his performance.

Seated three rows behind him, we watched the young maestro prepare. Focusing, ideating, leaning into his destiny as Trump's child savior. At about 11:50, Jacob leaned back dramatically to look over his shoulder at the small room behind him. "Full crowd," he said in a stage whisper to no one in particular. At least 30% of the seats were still empty.

Then the show began. Burkman and Wohl distributed "literature" to the assembled press. A "raw intelligence document" from Surefire Intelligence, LLC and a printed out FBI press release about an event in New York City that Robert Mueller attended in 2010 while heading that agency, placing him in Manhattan at the time of the alleged assault. Before giving the crowd adequate time to read it, Burkman announced the allegations were serious and then yielded the floor to Jacob. The accuser was not coming and was afraid for her life because...the press was invited to a press conference?

At that point, Wohl launched into a narrative of an alleged incident between Mueller and a woman named either Carolyn Cass or Carolyne Cass or Caroline Cass [it 's still a bit foggy] that was full of sordid coloratura and dark sexual abuse. It was also a narrative that departed from - and often conflicted with - the literature that Jacob had just handed out. It was an impressive performance made even moreso by its clear disassociation from whatever reality was being sold in the room. Wohl spun his yarn for about 10 minutes, claiming that the inflated rat likeness of Trump outside the room - yet visible from the windows dominating one side of it - was a sign of the crazy circus that the event had turned into [the even was objectively staid and there was no crowd around the rat other than two local workmen curiously taking pics of it with their phones]. He also seemed to intimate that a mob had bussed in by Antifa forces to disrupt the press conference [the streets of Arlington were almost eerily quiet, and if there was a bussed in mob, they never got off the bus].

Upon opening the floor to questions, Jacob was assailed with nettlesome facts. He had just referred to Surefire Intelligence as "my company" after denying he owned it for the last few days. "I can explain that," he said before proving that he couldn't. There was also the confusing spelling of his client's name. The document provided a surfeit of different spellings and Wohl seemed incapable of agreeing with Burkman [who somehow left the fly of his suit pants unzipped throughout the event] on a correct spelling of her name. There was also the matter of how Jacob became an investigator at all. "I'll clarify that," he said, before not clarifying it at all.

We couldn't help but think how this all could have been prevented if someone had stopped young Jacob from experimenting with trading securities as a boy and then telling him that he was good at it. Back in 2015, it was cute to have a teenage hedge fund manager. After all, regulators would catch him eventually and he would learn his lesson. We even found ourselves a few years ago letting Jacob off the hook for doing something rather venal and dumb because he was a kid. But someone should have stopped him. The whole batshit commedia dell'arte that we witnessed today, and which will only further infect our politics, could have been averted if someone had told 17-year-old Jacob Wohl to actually learn something.

And the ending of the whole crazy presser proved our hypothesis that enablers are truly the curse of Jacob Wohl.

Towards the end, Burkman "joked" that Jacob had an honorary law degree from Harvard. It did not seem like a joke at the time and Burkman's later clarification met with groans from the assembled press. But the moment that really drove home how damaged Jacob Wohl has been by the adults around him came close to the very end when Burkman leaned into the microphone and said with total sincerity that "Jacob is a child prodigy who has eclipsed Mozart."

His fly was still down.

 

[Gregolian]

I don't mind the snow at all. It's the freezing rain that's creating havoc.

Today, it's 32 degrees and we've got some mist coming down on the 4 inches of snow we got last night. It's supposed to cool down throughout the day and that most will form a frozen layer on top of the snow. My city has a salt shortage so only main roads get salt. Residential will ice rinks, and all they can do is warn us that that indeed will happen and we need to be careful

This is what needs to end

We're supposed to get rain snow mix at like 5pm and then it'll turn back to snow an hour or two later....

THAT shit concerns me.

 

[Higus]

There was a lot of stuff about it in the Muller thread back when it was happening. Many lulz were had

 

[HockeyBjj]

We're supposed to get rain snow mix at like 5pm and then it'll turn back to snow an hour or two later....

THAT shit concerns me.

Yep. The mixy shit where it switches to back below freezing is the red flag for driving conditions. Schools have closed so many times they're open a full extra week now in June. My wife is not happy

I drive a Subaru Outback with some real aggressive tires and manual transmission. It's the perfect thing for winter driving, which I need as I ice fish and go winter camping etc. Backfired tremendously on me yesterday as I ended up playing chauffer and picking up 3 gals to bring over to our place to watch the bachelor as that's like my wife and her friend's Sunday football. Then I had to drop them all off afterwards when even my car was sliding a bit in the frozen slop.

I messed up somewhere for it to get to this point.

 

[all caps]

My car was doing fine in the snow up until last night. The snow is just too high at this point.

 

[Gregolian]

Yep. The mixy shit where it switches to back below freezing is the red flag for driving conditions. Schools have closed so many times they're open a full extra week now in June. My wife is not happy

I drive a Subaru Outback with some real aggressive tires and manual transmission. It's the perfect thing for winter driving, which I need as I ice fish and go winter camping etc. Backfired tremendously on me yesterday as I ended up playing chauffer and picking up 3 gals to bring over to our place to watch the bachelor as that's like my wife and her friend's Sunday football. Then I had to drop them all off afterwards when even my car was sliding a bit in the frozen slop.

I messed up somewhere for it to get to this point.

I have an F150 with 4 wheel drive and some mud tires on it so it does GREAT in the snow/slush.... when it turns to ice it's going to be useless.

 

[Fawlty]

Las Vegas PD Source Admits Shooter "Could have been anyone."


When SWAT teams burst through the door of Stephen Paddock's MGM Grand hotel room, the last thing on their minds was stopping the mass shooting. "It was a living hell," said Lieutenant Dan Borsdorff. "Do you have any idea how tiring it is to run up stairs in tactical gear?"

Borsdorff made the decision moments after entering the stairwell that the LVPD should cut their losses and frame somebody. They chose as their target the reclusive, aging and unimportant Paddock because, according to Borsdorff, "That's when my legs got really tired. It could have been anybody in that room. Some grandmother, Sean "Puffy" Combs, or even a ballet dancer. We really lucked out that this guy was such a loser."

But Borsdorff and the LVPD soon realized that their plan had some major holes in it. By the time they reached Paddock's hotel room door, the shooting had not yet ceased. "Waiting for the real shooter to run out of ammo was heartbreaking for us. With every moment that passed, we knew our cover-up would come under greater scrutiny. It was God's mercy that the shooting stopped in time for us to murder this innocent person and retain plausible deniability."

Though they successfully executed Paddock in time for their cover-up to work, the LVPD's night was only beginning. They set to work hauling dozens of firearms - along with many kinds of ammunition and spent shell casings - up to Paddock's suite. "It was a real beauty," said Borsdorff. "I joked that this is why we 'police up our ammo' every time we shoot. The boys had a good laugh at that."

Working through the night, the LVPD fabricated the crime scene with practiced excellence and the occasional bout of humor. "At one point," said Borsdorff, "I was skulking around the suite with a pipe in my mouth, you know like Sherlock Holmes, interrogating the guys about blood splatter and asking if any of them had seen my hat."

The real shooter remains at large.

 

[TeTe]

Has anyone made a thread about Wells Fargo appearing to be collapsing?

Or the New Jersey rain tax?

Or how about the new Esquire magazine?