the human penis evolved the way it did because you're so bad at sex

Discussion in 'Mayberry Lounge' started by JosephDredd, Dec 15, 2016.

  1. JosephDredd

    JosephDredd Gold Belt

    Joined:
    May 29, 2013
    Messages:
    21,008
    Likes Received:
    24,982
    http://www.independent.co.uk/life-s...doesnt-last-long-enough-ucl-why-a7473401.html
     
  2. Exi

    Exi Dark Web Sys Adm/n Banned

    Joined:
    Jul 3, 2016
    Messages:
    5,817
    Likes Received:
    14,384
    Location:
    Standing on the shoulders of giants
    Anyone who has ever jammed their womb ferret upon reckless entry knows why we do not have bones in our clam hammer.
     
    Last edited: Dec 15, 2016
  3. Shael

    Shael Silver Belt

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2013
    Messages:
    12,188
    Likes Received:
    6,120
    If it ain't a bone y I got a boner rite now?
     
    hitcher, touchedbyjab, marioh and 4 others like this.
  4. Pugilistic

    Pugilistic Silver Belt

    Joined:
    May 14, 2008
    Messages:
    10,525
    Likes Received:
    17,309
    I read somewhere the average American male lasts 4 minutes. I can outlast the Average American for sure. Need to compensate for my manlet peen somehow
     
  5. Medical Marijuana Man

    Medical Marijuana Man Buddah Buddah Buddah Double Yellow Card

    Joined:
    Nov 8, 2015
    Messages:
    14,773
    Likes Received:
    48,411
    As long as I can get hard I don't care how bad I am at sex

    This is one race I'll win gold everytime I compete.
     
  6. Medical Marijuana Man

    Medical Marijuana Man Buddah Buddah Buddah Double Yellow Card

    Joined:
    Nov 8, 2015
    Messages:
    14,773
    Likes Received:
    48,411
    If I started off slow I could too but I'm like the wind up jack rabbit, once it's over its over fast.
     
    Defeat Unknown and HomeRun916 like this.
  7. scorpipede

    scorpipede you do yo thang Baby Smurf

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2007
    Messages:
    25,916
    Likes Received:
    32,576
    so the article claims that at some point a generation of humans just didn't have them because they weren't necessary?

    apparently I don't understand evolution like I thought I did.

    fuck it.
     
  8. Medical Marijuana Man

    Medical Marijuana Man Buddah Buddah Buddah Double Yellow Card

    Joined:
    Nov 8, 2015
    Messages:
    14,773
    Likes Received:
    48,411
    It's all bullshit. They make shit up as they go.

    Science.
     
  9. steve38

    steve38 Black Belt

    Joined:
    Jun 14, 2015
    Messages:
    5,720
    Likes Received:
    8,827
    Location:
    USA
    Pretty sure that why we have an opposable thumb. ;)
     
    touchedbyjab, WandySaku2 and mb23100 like this.
  10. scorpipede

    scorpipede you do yo thang Baby Smurf

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2007
    Messages:
    25,916
    Likes Received:
    32,576
    yeah I got to call bullshit on this too. The theory isn't because we didn't need it we got rid of it it's the species evolves due to traits that allow it to procreate over other less capable species or within a species, rather. Plus meteors and shit. Dinosoaurs smoked cigarettes too.
     
    touchedbyjab, Pwent and trolololol like this.
  11. JBSchroeds

    JBSchroeds The Lizard Knight

    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2009
    Messages:
    9,797
    Likes Received:
    2,930
    I'm not saying this article is correct, but every feature of the body has a metabolic cost to develop and maintain, as well as being an additional potential point of failure. If the penis bone didn't improve the ability to procreate then there'd be no real selective pressure to keep it and those with a smaller one (and eventually none at all) wouldn't be spending energy resources on that extra bone. Also, think of how often you've accidentally hit your dick on something because of our upright walking posture. Now imagine there was a bone in there that you could fracture. A broken dick bone means no mating while it's healing, and potentially no more mating ever (if the bone doesn't set right or you potentially die if the fracture is bad enough).
     
    evansusmc2, WandySaku2, Mike and 5 others like this.
  12. HomerThompson

    HomerThompson Banned Banned

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2005
    Messages:
    41,460
    Likes Received:
    71,624
    Location:
    Terror Lake
    [​IMG]
     
  13. HomerThompson

    HomerThompson Banned Banned

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2005
    Messages:
    41,460
    Likes Received:
    71,624
    Location:
    Terror Lake
    You can't just be lifting Far Side jokes like that.
     
  14. scorpipede

    scorpipede you do yo thang Baby Smurf

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2007
    Messages:
    25,916
    Likes Received:
    32,576
    that's a good point. just the other day I was rushing to the basement and banged my dick on the sideboard in my kitchen. I quickly thought "I just banged my dick on the sideboard. at least it wasn't the fellas though" and moved on with my day. A dick bone would have complicated things for sure.
     
    Left Hook Lacy and Green Poncho like this.
  15. scorpipede

    scorpipede you do yo thang Baby Smurf

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2007
    Messages:
    25,916
    Likes Received:
    32,576
    you saying we need to foot note our posts now buddeh?
     
    Anung Un Rama likes this.
  16. HomerThompson

    HomerThompson Banned Banned

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2005
    Messages:
    41,460
    Likes Received:
    71,624
    Location:
    Terror Lake
    Just some posts. Far Side is part of my childhood, and I won't see the intellectual property besmirched!
     
    Steve-French, LiLoMMA and scorpipede like this.
  17. MadSquabbles500

    MadSquabbles500 Steel Belt

    Joined:
    Jun 29, 2011
    Messages:
    28,342
    Likes Received:
    12,954
    Location:
    New Jersey now Queens
    Primates really dont have massive penises anyways. Chimps, monkeys, apes, gorillas, and bamboons have as small a wanker as humans.
     
  18. scorpipede

    scorpipede you do yo thang Baby Smurf

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2007
    Messages:
    25,916
    Likes Received:
    32,576
    fair enough! I usually only give credit to fellow posters here when I Dane Cook one of their jokes.

    anything else make the list for you? How about Calvin and Hobbes?
     
  19. HomerThompson

    HomerThompson Banned Banned

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2005
    Messages:
    41,460
    Likes Received:
    71,624
    Location:
    Terror Lake
    Calvin and Hobbes definitely. Bloom County too. Those two are the GOAT comic strips.
     
    scorpipede likes this.
  20. JaneJanes

    JaneJanes Banned Banned

    Joined:
    Oct 24, 2015
    Messages:
    308
    Likes Received:
    728
    Where would i put my dick bone all day if i had one? Either tape it to my leg or my belly. It would be very uncomfortable to walk with it taped to my leg, but would pop out the top of my pants if i tape it to my belly. That would be so unpleasant either way
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.