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My former best friend

Discussion in 'Mayberry Lounge' started by Pugilistic, Sep 6, 2018.

  1. There's a guy who at point I considered my best friend. I met him 6 years ago and we clicked. We live in the same area so we hung out a few times a week. We shared a lot about our lives to each other. We were there for each other when we had issues with our exes. He met his current girlfriend of 3 years because of me. I helped him move several times because I was the only friend with a car. I used to think we were there for each other and this friendship was one of the strongest I've had in my life.

    But we stopped hanging out with about an year ago due to a combination of things but mostly him making less effort to meet me. It didn't just happen to me but also to our mutual friends. I thought we naturally grew apart. It hurt a bit to think my best friend didn't want to be my friend anymore but I understood people have their own lives to live. I had no hard feelings, although I lost a bit of respect for him because he would give me half-assed attempts to reconnect without following through on anything. For example I ran into him once and we talked about hanging out the next day and he canceled the next day because he was tired. I have a hard time respecting a man who does that.

    I recently found out he was talking shit about me behind my back. The way I found out was that I coincidentally ended up hanging out with a couple other people who also used to be good friends with him but the same thing happened to them where he made very little effort to actually hang out but talked a lot about hanging out. He came up on the conversation and we ended up airing our grievances about him. Turns out he was talking shit about me to another friend while he was talking shit about that friend to another friend. One guy said he was shocked that this friend was talking shit about me to him because he knew him and I were really close. Then this guy later found out that our "friend" was doing the same thing to another guy.

    Dude was always eccentric and weird (one of the weirdest people I've ever met) but I'm not exactly normal myself so I just chalked it up as him being "unique." I never thought he was malicious. When I first started to know him he opened to me about him having severe schizophrenia and OCD but he has said he had gotten better. Now I'm thinking back and realizing this dude was never released from his illnesses. He's said some crazy ass shit that I always just laughed off but now it's all making more sense. It's bordering on psychotic.

    You never know. This only makes me think I need to filter out people better and pay attention to red flags. I've met too many people who I thought were cool at first only to find out they're sociopaths or just giant douchebags.

    Cliffs:
    Had a best friend for almost 6 years
    Dude stopped hanging out with me and a bunch of other mutual friends
    Thought we just grew apart
    Turns out he was talking shit about me including other people who were his friends
    I'm like WTF because this dude used to be my best friend
    People are fucking weird
     
  2. luv24nic8 Purple Belt

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    Il be your friend
     
  3. IloveTHIS Humble Narcissist

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    Cliffs of cliffs?
     
  4. IloveTHIS Humble Narcissist

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    My best friend, the best friend I ever had, the guy I considered a brother, the guy that was above even my other few friends I genuinely love, turned his back on me too.

    He got a girl pregnant when he was 20 and he didnt want to be a father, and didn't to stay with the girl. Somehow, this mentally broke him. He stopped talking to me and moved away. Eventually moved back, still doesn't talk to me.

    Really sucks because some of my best memories are with someone that ultimately turned their back on me for no reason. And its not possible to form a new bond like that as an adult. Just not the same.
     
  5. Dude it's 6 sentences..Some of them aren't even complete.
     
  6. Turkleton Purple Belt

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    "Pugilistic was never my friend" - Kenny Florian
     
  7. Frank23 Enter Sandman Belt Platinum Member

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    - Take a shower

    - Hit the weights

    - Get a clue

    You'll be fine, brother.
     
  8. YellowBanenoo Banned Banned

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  9. mrsenor Black Belt

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    confront him
     
  10. I've moved a while ago and rather just keep it that way.
     
  11. mrsenor Black Belt

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    you just created a thread over this
     
  12. So?
     
  13. Jackie Daytona Come to my bar! We’re having a talent show.

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    Yeah I had a good friend who has schizophrenia. We were real tight and the same thing happened to me. He ended up shanking a motherfucker downtown and is now in prison.

    I never caught on to his mental illness until someone else told me about it. It made perfect sense too thinking back on it.
     
  14. I wonder about my friend as well. The guy was obsessed with pedophilia, as in disgusted by it to the point of obsession, and he had vehement hatred for the Catholic church. The pope once visited my city and this guy talked about a plan to assassinate the pope while he was here and wasn't even joking. I laughed it off at the time but I wonder if he would ever try to pull something like that.
     
  15. facePuncher7 Founder of the militant wing of the Salvation Army

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    He's probably ashamed of himself, whether he is aware or not.

    Similar to OPs case maybe, when guys feel shame they sometimes externalise it by attacking whatever's nearby, talking bad about others etc. It can make you momentarily feel a bit better about yourself to be like "pffft look at that dickhead", but it's generally coming from a position of self loathing in my experience.
     
  16. My2Cents Brown Belt

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    You sound like 2 women
     
  17. all caps Gold Belt

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    What's a little shit talking mean? Who cares about that. Weve all got opinions and weve all got drama.
     
  18. HARRISON_3 Gold Belt

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    [​IMG]
     
  19. mrsenor Black Belt

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    do you talk shit about your friends?
     
  20. all caps Gold Belt

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    I'm a grown ass man

    Ain't got no friends
    <2>
     

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