Lets talk chimpanzees vs humans

[Deleted member 409801]

It is possible for humans to win a fight against a leopard, as in the case of a 56-year-old woman who killed an attacking leopard with a sickle and spade, and survived with heavy injuries,[13] and the case of a 73-year-old man in Kenya who fatally tore the tongue out of a leopard.

Also says that leopards sometimes prey on gorilla's who are massively overhyped round these parts, they're vegetarian muscle-bound pussies who don't kill anything.

they'd kill you......or me though.


The fact that leopards kll gorillas is more a testament to how badass a leopard is than anything, considering 200 lbs is about the upper size limit.


2 anecdotes does not a trend make........you should know that.

 

[Jack Handy jr]

never fight a rampaging chimpanzee

 

[Jack Handy jr]

Chimps are strong. Not 10x human strong, of course, but strong. Also good luck teaching a chimp to fight under unified rules. It will make Jon Jones shy with it's eye-gouging and it will likely try to bite your tendons or neck arterias.
However, I don't see a chimp taking CroCops LHK or Roy's overhand right very well.

lmao at the last line.

as soon as cro cop raises leg (whether its cemetery or hospital) yep castration via monkey chomp.

as soon as Roy rears back for that over hand yep anesthesia free mastectomy.

 

[rocketskates]

Yeah, but don't they go for your eyes and junk first in a fight? No thanks. You may win the fight but you'll lose the war if you know what I mean.

 

[Jack Handy jr]

I think a Pure BJJ specialist like a marcelo Garcia could def take a chimps back and put him to sleep.

 

[Graves The Elder]

chimps bite like a bulldog.
humans do not.
unless that's what she's being paid to do.

 

[MMAmathwiz]

they'd kill you......or me though.


The fact that leopards kll gorillas is more a testament to how badass a leopard is than anything, considering 200 lbs is about the upper size limit.


2 anecdotes does not a trend make........you should know that.

I doubt that Leopards are hunting adult silverback Gorillas, they probably go after young gorillas using stealth tactics, secure a kill on a youth and take off.

This is the case with most animal packs that get preyed on, in this way animals are more fatalistic than humans, they don't seek revenge but go on instincts. A Lion on its own would have little chance of killing a full grown male Bull that weighs 1000s pounds but a Lion can chase off a whole herd of Bulls, the Bulls run away on instinct even though if they really wanted to they could team up and trample the Lion.

I assume its the same with Leopards who hunt Chimps and Gorillas, they go after the young, the old and sick and since Chimps have a natural instinct to see big cats as predators they will mostly run away. The Leopards quickly secures a kill on a youth and by that time its too late so the Chimps/Gorillas usually flee and don't fight back based on instinct.

 

[Takanori Gomez]

They want none of that........




Gorilla got cucked that night........

 

[ssBaldy]

lmao at the last line.

as soon as cro cop raises leg (whether its cemetery or hospital) yep castration via monkey chomp.

as soon as Roy rears back for that over hand yep anesthesia free mastectomy.

It is not like chimps have much faster reflexes than a trained human.
Also, I aknowledge that chimp will of course use all the dirty tactics possible, so I am not proposing for CroCop to go and try kicking it.

 

[WrestlingJudo]

The perpetual sherdog chimp thread never fails to make me laugh.

 

[ens189]

But we do have brains, so we are not prey which is not a debatable fact.

That being said, a chimp would maul just about every MMA fighter. Chimps go for the balls often. When whoever is in there gets their balls ripped off, game over.

Just wear a JRE Diamond MMA Steel Thai Cup and boom...problem solved.

 

[aus101]

Come on they bound up trees like they're nothing and hang off one hand for days. Get your fat adult ass to some monkey bars and see how that goes for you.

A big male chimp will fuck anyone up pretty easily.

 

[aus101]

Their brains sit differently inside their skulls. They are a lot like us, but I suspect it takes different types of blows to KO them.

On another note, most predators are build in a way that blows to the head are not effective. You cannot eye-gouge a gator after it bites for example: the eye-ball retracts into the skull.

Animals are beasts man.

Most animals must be able to survive attack from other males of the species, if they plan on reproducing. That means silverbacks must be able to absorb strikes from other silverbacks, a human can't hurt that.

Chimps also have to survive attacks from other chimps (and the mother fuckers love going to war), or even falling out of a tree. They are much more durable than any human.

 

[Bagatur]

I have read some stories of chimp attacks. fuckers can pull your limbs off. your... fucking... limbs... off!!! they can literally tear you apart.

 

[aus101]

they'd kill you......or me though.


The fact that leopards kll gorillas is more a testament to how badass a leopard is than anything, considering 200 lbs is about the upper size limit.


2 anecdotes does not a trend make........you should know that.

Leopards are some of the most notorious man eaters. One in India had a kill count of more than 400 dead. 400 people unable to best it in combat (or even get away).

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leopard_attack

 

[rj144]

I have read some stories of chimp attacks. fuckers can pull your limbs off. your... fucking... limbs... off!!! they can literally tear you apart.

Chimps are nasty, but never have I heard them pulling off someone's limbs. Where have you seen that?

 

[Bagatur]

Chimps are nasty, but never have I heard them pulling off someone's limbs. Where have you seen that?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Travis_(chimpanzee)
'grievously mauled her, blinding her while severing her nose, ears, and both hands, and severely lacerating her face'

some nasty pics in the link inside

Spoiler

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...m-Charla-Nash-wins-4m-compensation-owner.html

 

[Readybodisready]

Lol, you're so clueless. Btw, in that video that dude got serious inuries from that Chimp who wasn't even going all out attack. HIs hands and fingers were completely mangled and shattered, that was just from the chimp grabbing his hands and not letting go.

Says the treehugging chimp supporter. Show me evidence of the guy in the video being extremely injured like you claim.

Which still wouldn't prove much because the whole point of the thread is not average human vs chimp but top tier humans vs chimps.

Do you know the world of difference between a HW mixed martial artist and Chris who works downtown in an office? Gigantic.

Lets stop fooling ourselves with unimpressive displays from chimps against terrified joe's and middle aged women.

I worked with a guy who lived in Africa his whole life and has way more knowledge and experience with chimps than your average westerner, when I told him what my friend said about chimps he just laughed his ass off and told me that a chimp would tear a man apart.

That's adorable.

Unfortunately anecdotal evidence is not evidence.

 

[Readybodisready]

http://www.slate.com/articles/health_and_science/science/2009/02/how_strong_is_a_chimpanzee.html

Interesting story here. I'll pull a few of the highlights if anyone wants to read a long post.

A guy in the 1920s had a device where a "husky lad" could pull over 500 with both hands and most could not do 200 pounds with 1 hand. He had a chimp that was able to pull 1260 pounds with both hands and 1 that did 847 with 1 hand. What's more, the football players were free to use the dynamometer as they wished, while the chimpanzees had been forced to pull the apparatus from a clumsy posture in their cages. = Thus the 5 to 8 times as strong as humans myth arose

This is the fake story I mentioned earlier. Lets please stop using this to save some credibility, guys.

It's not even about it being but the fact that some of you are gullible enough to believe it. How in the hell is a 3 foot-100lb chimp with puny legs and zero leverage going to pull that amount? Lol.

In 1943, Glen Finch of the Yale primate laboratory rigged an apparatus to test the arm strength of eight captive chimpanzees. An adult male chimp, he found, pulled about the same weight as an adult man. Once he'd corrected the measurement for their smaller body sizes, chimpanzees did turn out to be stronger than humans—but not by a factor of five or anything close to it.

Repeated tests in the 1960s confirmed this basic picture. A chimpanzee had, pound for pound, as much as twice the strength of a human when it came to pulling weights. The apes beat us in leg strength, too,

A chimpanzee's skeletal muscle has longer fibers than the human equivalent and can generate twice the work output over a wider range of motion.

Ok finally something sensible. I have no trouble admitting that in certain areas of strength display, a chimp MIGHT be twice as strong as an AVERAGE human.

But our strongest lifters completely blow them out of the water, it's not even going to be remotely close.

Also from an ABC article

Indeed, chimpanzees have been shown to be about four times as strong as humans comparable in size, according to evolutionary biologist Alan Walker, formerly of Pennsylvania State University.


My conclusion


It's important to note the average male chimp is about 90 pounds. Based on this on the most recent tests I conclude that a 90 pound chimp fighting a 180 pound man would be about twice as strong as the man. However the chimp would be faster and has more natural killing tools like nails and teeth.

Ok so going by what I just stated above, it still does nothing for the chimp in a fight aside from its fangs.

If it is facing a human specimen like Ubereem, JDS etc. it's not going to use that strength(and these guys are far stronger than chimps at ANY type of strength test) in any meaningful or effective way. Their body types aren't built/evolved for it, they have too little muscle control and they have no skill.

Look at how chimps fight eachother. It is mostly slapping and pushing. They basicely fight like two gay guys. They have no powerful strikes, they have no leverage whatsoever to grapple in any way, that video of the chimp attacking the guy shows it, they're freaking useless.

Oh so he gets a hold of the fighter's arm? Eat a knee with all that lbs of force(I don't have the stats at hand from that NG show) behind it. Or get thrown around. The fighter could easily hold the chimps head to the ground and stomp it's skull in with knees a la Coleman-Igor. This is ridiculous.

 

[Jack Handy jr]

It is not like chimps have much faster reflexes than a trained human.
Also, I aknowledge that chimp will of course use all the dirty tactics possible, so I am not proposing for CroCop to go and try kicking it.

As a former pro kickboxer and MMA fighter there are def some moves that you could possibly defend your self against a rampaging chimpanzee

1.savate French art of kick fighting whilst looking cool arguably. Savateurs are known to be able to keep opponents at range with a plethora (el guapo) of kicks.

2. jail house rock. A prison system of fighting made famous by the infamous rikers island gladiator named "mother dear" . mother dear 's legend includes fighting off multiple attackers armed with boofed shanks and shivs and coming out unscathed.

If you can dodge a wrench you can dodge a ball, also if you can fend off fifty convicts with knives you could obliterate a chimp using the jail house rock fighting systema.

3. ghetto girl windmill martial fighting system. I've personally seen plenty of dudes get there ass whipped and embarrassed by enraged young black girls doing the head down windmill technique initially honed by ancient Sanskrit Hindu master bodi dharma.

4.Scott Morris Ohio ninjutsu. Though it didn't work as ideally as he may have wanted it to work against pat smith. I strongly believe that if Scott Morris were allowed to bring the tools of the ninja (pronounced "neen ha") he would've def beat pat smith. A blowfish poison tipped neen ha throwing star at an enraged chimp game over.


And lastly

5.my own martial system Handledotesu

Or It's shortened name in the spec op community " Handlejitsu"

I developed it as an assassin for CIA Delta force team 6. Where I was contractually employed on above top secret missions as a freelance cleaner/merc/ operator back in Saigon and Cambodia..back when I was in the shit.

Essentially I had chimpanzees in mind when I developed the thing along side Sensei Segal and Frank Dux. I won't go in to detail (too deadly for the internets) but trust me a chimp wouldn't stand a fucking chance.