If you were UFC matchmaker, who is on your White House card?

[Bone Cold]

Love him or loathe him, the current POTUS, Donald J. Trump, is a UFC fan and marches to the beat of his own drum, so his promise of a UFC fight card on the White House lawn cannot be dismissed as an impossibility.

Given this, if a White House lawn UFC event were to take place in ~1 years time in honour of the 250th American Independence Day, what bouts do you have on the card?

In my mind, you'd want a balance of existing stars, Americans and future stars, in what could very well be the most watched event of all time... #worldfuckingdomination #BiggerThanSoccer etc.

 

[MaulingMyClown]

Donald Trump v Joe Biden
Melania Trump v Jill Biden
Don Jr vs Hunter Biden
Kayla Harrison v Kamala Harris

 

[gondo]

100% WMMA.

 

[Spam On Rye]

Neocons vs The Gays. Gonna be a lot of inner-team bickering for sure.

 

[MisfitsBR]

too much think to happens yet... but the best American right now is Sean Brady, so maybe Islam/JDM x Brady main event
Kayla x Nunes - co main
some patriots, idk, Sean Strickland, Justin Gaethje
a easy money fight to Moicano wins and shout out that he loves freedom

 

[svmr_db]

 

[Ron Mexico]

Sounds like a setup to me
Last time that many UFC fans showed up at the White House, they all got arrested

 

[Luthien]

Shogun gets a chance at the belt (He wins)

I'd cut Akalabla and put a badly crippled Lionheart in there

 

[Söze Aldo]

 

[Kung Fu Kowboy]

Circus for the Circus. So why not , Conor vs Jake Paul... Colby Co-Main...

 

[Only Here for Attachments]

Entire card of American HWs

 

[Here's Johnny!]

too much think to happens yet... but the best American right now is Sean Brady, so maybe Islam/JDM x Brady main event
Kayla x Nunes - co main
some patriots, idk, Sean Strickland, Justin Gaethje
a easy money fight to Moicano wins and shout out that he loves freedom

You can't allow any muslims that close to the white house

 

[cburm]

Aspinal vs Gane
DDP vs khamzat
Islam vs jdm
Gaethje vs illia
Dustin vs paddy
Armen vs fiziev

 

[Senbonzakura]

Dumb shit lol

Bryce Mitchell vs A pig carcass
Diego Sanchez vs Josh Fabia (bra and panties match)

Bo Nickal vs His confidence in himself
Zuckerberg vs Elon slapfight to open

 

[philcrow]

Netanyahu vs Belal
Colby vs Masvidal rematch. Loser gets deported.
Keri Starmer vs Aspinall
Ben Shapiro vs Islam
Jones vs drug testing
Biden vs a teleprompter

 

[Meathead Jock]

Donald Trump v Joe Biden
Melania Trump v Jill Biden
Don Jr vs Hunter Biden
Kayla Harrison v Kamala Harris

Don Jr vs Hunter would be a good one.

 

[Rampage_Jackson]

Triple Threat Main Event: Randy Couture vs Brock Lesnar vs Fedor
8 ball on a pole Co-Main: Special Openweight bout Conor McGregor vs the Ladyboy Lova Jon Jones
Tag Team Bout: The American Gangsters Chael Sonnen & Colby Covington vs Brazilian Bus Petter Nogueira Brothers
Legends Circuit Bout: Bas Rutten vs Tito Ortiz
WMMA Opener: Kayla Harrison vs Returning Ronda Rousey for the title of Miss America

 

[usernamee]

Every single answer has been correct so far

 

[Spiderbite]

Sounds like a setup to me
Last time that many UFC fans showed up at the White House, they all got arrested

Pat Miletich vs. the capitol police II.

In all seriousness though, life is imitating art and Idiocracy is coming to fruition way quicker than I was expecting.

 

[Morris88]

Elon Musk vs Mark Zuckerberg, loser gets sent to Mars