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Dating and being dishonest about intentions

drstrangelov said:
Basically, meeting and having sex with people is part of finding a long term relationship. The right girl won't let you get away with that shit.
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Right...... The "right girl" (in America, to idiots) will have let all the OTHER guys have got away with it, but then found you and was able to control herself. Like, the girl that doesn't find you sexy, but thinks maybe you are worth using, is "the one."


NO. Hook up in a LTR with a girl who puts our with you the first date. It means she ACTUALLY LIKES YOU as much as the other guys she banged immediately.
 
Since you didn't ragenerd in this thread yet I'll wait some more replies.
 
Amerikuracana said:
Right...... The "right girl" (in America, to idiots) will have let all the OTHER guys have got away with it, but then found you and was able to control herself. Like, the girl that doesn't find you sexy, but thinks maybe you are worth using, is "the one."


NO. Hook up in a LTR with a girl who puts our with you the first date. It means she ACTUALLY LIKES YOU as much as the other guys she banged immediately.
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Dude, I think you're working through some stuff and that's great, but as written, this is nonsense bordering on a mundane point about modern dating.
 
drstrangelov said:
Dude, I think you're working through some stuff and that's great, but as written, this is nonsense bordering on a mundane point about modern dating.
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Uh, no.

Relationships and marriage are becoming trash in America because men are marrying women that don't respect them.. Don't even really like them, and women are pretending this is normal.. Like they aren't even supposed to be "in love" with their husbands. It's wrong. Women, for their own sexual greed, want to seperate sex from serious relationships. They want to get their brains pounded out and have "good sex" until they have had enough, then get married. This isn't a cool world.

Seriously date somebody you have sexual chemistry with. Sex bonds humans together. All this separation of sex from actual relationships is poisoning the Wests culture.

If you are the "cool" guy she puts out to right away, you might always be the cool guy to her. Then things have a chance to work.
 
Amerikuracana said:
Uh, no.

Relationships and marriage are becoming trash in America because men are marrying women that don't respect them.. Don't even really like them, and women are pretending this is normal.. Like they aren't even supposed to be "in love" with their husbands. It's wrong. Women, for their own sexual greed, want to seperate sex from serious relationships. They want to get their brains pounded out and have "good sex" until they have had enough, then get married. This isn't a cool world.

Seriously date somebody you have sexual chemistry with. Sex bonds humans together. All this separation of sex from actual relationships is poisoning the Wests culture.

If you are the "cool" guy she puts out to right away, you might always be the cool guy to her. Then things have a chance to work.
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What does any of that have to do with the post you quoted? Also, you left out some words in your first post, it made your point largely incomprehensible.
 
drstrangelov said:
What does any of that have to do with the post you quoted? Also, you left out some words in your first post, it made your point largely incomprehensible.
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No. My phone autocorrects "out" to "our." I do not know why.

My first post said you should hook up with a girl that finds you attractive enough to bang you fast. You acted like that's a bad idea. I then stated why more relationships should be based on decent sexual chemistry.
 
Amerikuracana said:
No. My phone autocorrects "out" to "our." I do not know why.

My first post said you should hook up with a girl that finds you attractive enough to bang you fast. You acted like that's a bad idea. I then stated why more relationships should be based on decent sexual chemistry.
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I didn't say that was bad, i said you should do that, and when one of these girls stands out, drop all the others and take a run at something more serious.
 
drstrangelov said:
I didn't say that was bad, i said you should do that, and when one of these girls stands out, drop all the others and take a run at something more serious.
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Well then I misinterpreted "The right girl won't let you get away with that shit."
 
I had a buddy who would lie to every woman and tell them he was looking for something serious. Then, he would bang them and basically never speak to them again. I felt bad for the gals many times. I've always been one to be honest about what I want and I've had no shortage of pussy in my day. If they are down to fuck knowing my intentions then awesome. If not, I move on to the next one.
 
Being honest about your intentions is something you should do if you are interested in a long successful relationship.

If you're not, then the downside is that your responsible for them letting themselves get tricked... but this has to happen for them to learn from it. Morally its corrupt, but ethically it's aces.

Really though, if you want your cake and to eat it too, Say you're looking for a LTR. It just probably isnt them, because 1/3,500,000,000 odds arent good. You're not lying and you're giving them what they want.
 
Man it sounds like you're going through some rough stuff emotionally, my condolences.

But yeah, to me personally blatantly lying about intentions isn't a nice thing to do. Hit up bars and clubs if you want one night stands. If you're going to do tinder make it clear you're not looking for anything serious right now. Although I get we have needs sexually, it sounds like you're using random casual sex to avoid the grieving process. Which is understandable because grief is horrible.
 
Amerikuracana said:
Uh, no.

Relationships and marriage are becoming trash in America because men are marrying women that don't respect them.. Don't even really like them, and women are pretending this is normal.. Like they aren't even supposed to be "in love" with their husbands. It's wrong. Women, for their own sexual greed, want to seperate sex from serious relationships. They want to get their brains pounded out and have "good sex" until they have had enough, then get married. This isn't a cool world.

Seriously date somebody you have sexual chemistry with. Sex bonds humans together. All this separation of sex from actual relationships is poisoning the Wests culture.

If you are the "cool" guy she puts out to right away, you might always be the cool guy to her. Then things have a chance to work.
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<SelenaWow>
THAT is why relationships are trash in America? because women don't respect men? lolwut? who hurt you?
There are a whole host of reasons to describe how relationships got to be how they are, and it isn't just between men and women.

Relationships, ALL of them have been on the decline. There are a lot of different reasons for that. MANY people are simply shitty communicators, whether it be between them and their partners, or between them and family members, coworkers, and strangers on the streets.
You have a very simplistic view of relationships, sex, and what sex means to individuals, and how men and women perceive sex.

Men and women tend to think about sex in very different ways, and it definitley isn't simply about "get their brains pounded" out for women. lol
And deciding whether or not a relationship is worthy or not on whether she puts out as fast as she did with the last "cool guy" is terrible, juvenile advice. Sex can be a lot more complicated for a woman, and her putting out quickly does not automatically mean she did it because she liked you. You can pressure a girl into sex pretty easily, she could be feeling lonely/sad/depressed and is just doing it, she could simply just be doing it because she doesn't want to disappoint you, she could be bored, etc, etc--girls fuck for a lot of other reasons that men don't

Sex is important to a relationship. I don't disagree with that. But it generally means something different for us than it does with women. Not 100% different, but there is definitely a different view of it.
 
Leonard Haid said:
Some people need years to get over the loss of a loved one. Some need less than a week, apparently.
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koolinkunming said:
“My girlfriend passed away a few weeks ago and I've started dating in the last week.”

Stopped reading here. The grief is deep in this one.
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Well it's possible she was on a sick bed for a long time and he had already grieved and let her go long before the physical passing.

I know someone who did the bed side vigil for almost two years over a comatose partner and despite them being a vegetable end just waiting to die they would not cheat.

I would not blame a person in that spot for getting sex right away
 
Dude, the key is to say nothing and when they ask, "do you want to get married?" "do you want kids?" etc, just say "I'm not looking for anything but I am open to everything with the right person at the right time."

By the way, they all say "no hook-up" and fuck on the first date so they're just trying to pretend they are not as slutty as they are.
 
You're essentially manipulating womens' emotional needs and expectations so you can get your rocks off. That's pretty shitty.
 
Amerikuracana said:
Right...... The "right girl" (in America, to idiots) will have let all the OTHER guys have got away with it, but then found you and was able to control herself. Like, the girl that doesn't find you sexy, but thinks maybe you are worth using, is "the one."


NO. Hook up in a LTR with a girl who puts our with you the first date. It means she ACTUALLY LIKES YOU as much as the other guys she banged immediately.
Click to expand...
we disagree on some major things i think you crazy but man this so true. I think only exception is she a virgin then in that case at least you know she not giving it up everyone. There are other ways you can tell if she find you sexy. i think some guy cannot handle truth it probably for the best some cannot take it.
 
Your soul is becoming a darker and darker place. Without realizing it you'll become attracted ro someone like yourself or worse which will end up causing you extreme turmoil.
The only way to recover and change directions is to reckon with your past and face the pain you've caused.
 
Fuck that’s cold bro. I often think man if I put some small effort into it I could fuck some chicks from wholefoods or the gym but I would feel terrible after since I would only use them for my pleasure. The seconds after you bust are when you are the most mentally clear as a man and I know that I would feel like a piece of shit. Unless of course that’s what they are looking for also...haha

....hypothetically of course, my lady wouldn’t appreciate that...
 
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