Buddy got caught jerking it at work

My buddy called me today and told me he got caught cracking one off a work today, said he’s got a meeting next week thinks he’s gonna get canned. Anyone got any funny gifs I can send him lol
lol. I tried wacking it once at work but could not climax it was a very uncomfortable and tense place to beat your meat and then you have the burden of having to go back to work after.
 
No he’s a miner, said he put a truck down and was out of range when he radioed for repair to cone out. Thought he’d do some self care then walk to radio reception. Turns out the other driver radioed it in and the supervisor came out to see what was going on with the truck
Holy shit @John Mabrey I think this guy knows stu. Get the canadians in here. Not niko
 
I myself, I jerk off at least twice a day. Once in the morning, right after I work out, then once right after lunch. I want to. That's not why I do it. I do it 'cause I fucking *need* to. Think about it. You're dealing with numbers. All day long, decimal points, high frequencies. Bang, bang, bang. fucking digits. All very acidic above-the-shoulders mustard shit. All right? It kind of wigs some people out. Right? You gotta feed the geese to keep the blood flowing. I keep the rhythm below the belt. This is not a tip, this is a prescription. Trust me. If you don't, you will fall out of balance, split your differential and tip the fuck over. Or worse yet, I've seen this happen, implode. Implosions are ugly. Pop off to the bathroom, work one out any time you can. When you get really good at it, you'll fucking be stroking and you'll be thinking about money.
I have literally never jacked off
 
My buddy called me today and told me he got caught cracking one off a work today, said he’s got a meeting next week thinks he’s gonna get canned. Anyone got any funny gifs I can send him lol


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There was that soldier running one out to cheerleaders at a game. Can't find it.
 
Unless there’s clear written rule against rubbing one out... they can eat shit. He can walk in there and say “oh was that not ok? I don’t remember there being any rules regarding on the job masturbation”


If this doesn’t work I have one last trick up my sleeve. When they fire him, he should get really upset and say “you’re only firing me because I’m gay!”

then just sit back and watch them backpedal until he walks out with a pay raise


No but seriously, I think he should invoke his Weingarten rights and demand union representation in any meeting that could be punitive
 
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My buddy called me today and told me he got caught cracking one off a work today, said he’s got a meeting next week thinks he’s gonna get canned. Anyone got any funny gifs I can send him lol

You work with a Sherdogger?
 
No he’s a miner, said he put a truck down and was out of range when he radioed for repair to cone out. Thought he’d do some self care then walk to radio reception. Turns out the other driver radioed it in and the supervisor came out to see what was going on with the truck

why would anyone snitch on someone else.
 
raping the earth is fine, raping yourself is a massive no no apparently
 
Rookie mistake. This is why staff toilets exist.
 
"I thought you said thoroughly examine my shaft. Ohhhhh, you meant mine shaft. Someone should really fix the reception on these radios."
 
does anyone find the term 'miner' could be used for a single act of self pleasuring?
" I was home alone that day as work was closed for the shutdown. My wife took the kids to the park. I fired up the internet and decided to give myself a 'miner'.
 
My buddy called me today and told me he got caught cracking one off a work today, said he’s got a meeting next week thinks he’s gonna get canned. Anyone got any funny gifs I can send him lol

Happens to the best of us
 
How many of us can honestly say that we've never jacked it at work though?
 
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