Your parents

My mom is a 5'1" little Filipino drill sergeant. She is a very loving woman, but was a very strict mother. Between my parents I think they did a very good job teaching me respect and responsibility for my own actions. When I was about 10 my dad got laid off and we moved from a nice 3 bedroom/2 story house into a 2 bedroom single wide mobile home. I watched my parents struggle for years while my dad went back to school, got a good job, got laid off again, struggled some more, back to school, and into a good job that he still has today. While they didn't teach me about hard work directly, going through the lean times with my parents brought hard work ethic to me. I worked mowing lawns/yard work, manual labor growing up to be able to afford anything beyond basic necessities.

Now that I'm a parent I want to pass these values on to my kids. I have a good job that provides very well, and unless something goes horribly wrong it will put my kids through college and send me off into retirement. My kids likely won't have to struggle like my family when I was younger so one of my main goals while my kid grows up is to weed out any sense of entitlement with him growing up.
 
therealdope said:
You're Irish - amirite?

It's okay, my dad's side of the family is Irish.
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haha. its so obvious just from my post :icon_lol:

Parents came from Ireland, mother when she was still in school (but my grandparents moved back later) and father after he graduated uni....but I'm born and raised in England.
 
Mountain Dew said:
My dad provided for our family, but he and I aren't very close. We can't really have a normal conversation, and he's kind of a negative douche. Only time we really converse, is when he needs help with his iPod or some shit.
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Somewhat similar situation. My dad was also a provider, but also very negative, cynical, always criticizing everything- even though he is a staunch fundamentalist christian he would still find ways to pick apart sermons/hymns (and people wonder why I've rejected christianity lol). He gave me some beatings I will never forget.

My mom is similar but not as bad, but she's the one who always gives me great advice.

But he also did something later in life that really made him a piece of shit in my eyes. My dad wonders why his sons don't talk to him anymore- hey, take a look in the mirror motherfucker. Yeah I don't consider myself close at all.
 
Ok here's a more complete breakdownL

I grew up in a very strict religious household where every second of my life was monitored 24/7. It didn't help that my dad was the principal of every fucking school I attended, and my mom was the music teacher at most schools as well. My dad would usually come to field trips with my class just to monitor me, which was always super embarrassing in front of the girls I'd be crushing on (lulz).

I was never allowed to listen to rock music and it was usually classical music (mostly Bach, ugh) that was playing 24/7. I could watch movies and even rated-R ones sometimes (lol) as long as there was just violence- no sex, that's really bad! My friends thought my parents were weird as fuck for not being allowed to own an electric guitar.

I wasn't allowed to date at all in HS- not that there was much to choose from at a private school. Don't ever go to a private school, education is great but there's a lot of stuck-up assholes. Suffice it to say I would have had much better time in public school.

I don't come from money and I wasn't dirt poor growing up. But there were many difficult times. We moved around from state to state in total, eight. That was always difficult.

The best things to come out of my upbringing:

1. Adaptability. I always had to adapt moving from place to place. When shit happens like losing a job or something drastic, I know I can adapt, I've lived that.

2. Discipline. My parents taught me the importance of working hard. You have to earn your place in the world, don't expect shit to get handed down.

Can't think of anything else at the moment. I love my parents but still harbor resentment for a lot of things, especially something recently that I mentioned in the previous post.
 
my parents taught me sacrifice, being generous, doing the right things
 
My parents taught me the value of money by not buying me every hot product.
 
They did everything right, the mistake was having me in the first place. I'm never having kids, I've come to the conclusion that anyone who intentionally has kids is a selfish and presumptuous c.unt.

MarloStanfield said:
i hate my parents, i just feel absolutely no love for them,
is it cold to say i wish they were dead?
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Hah, the other day my dad heard that his dad had died. His response was sincere laughter and to say, "bout fuckin time, burn in hell." It was literally the happiest I've ever seen him. Later in the day he found out he was just in the hospital and not actually dead yet, you've never seen such disappointment.
 
Good:

Though too many to list, here it goes:

-Loving and Nurturing environment
-Extremely tight nit, to this day, family remains the most important thing in my life
-Stressed the importance of education from an early age. My parents grew up in the third world, and education was the only means of escape from poverty
-Stability (both financial and otherwise). While I wouldn't necessarily say that we were wealthy growing up, I don't ever remember being in want of anything.

The Bad:

-Similarly to Safyre, my charmed existence resulted in motivation issues when I was a teen
-My mom is a three time cancer survivor. Not her fault, but those times scarred me pretty significantly
-My parents (while happily married for 40+ years) lived in two difference cities since before I was born. My dad had a job as a professor in Windsor, and my mom worked for the government in Toronto. During the time (70s) it was really hard for minorities to find employment, so they made the decision to live apart.

What I want to be as a parent?

-I want to be able to provide my children with the same advantages I had growing up
-I want to teach them that money is important, but love and integrity should always come first
-Financially support them through school. Education remains a high priority in my life, and I want to allow my kids to reach the highest levels without having to worry about money.
 
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Katsumi Yamada said:
haha. its so obvious just from my post :icon_lol:

Parents came from Ireland, mother when she was still in school (but my grandparents moved back later) and father after he graduated uni....but I'm born and raised in England.
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Haha - my dad is from Dublin. But my family is not stereotypically Irish.
 
My mom is a great parent, even if she can be irrational sometimes. She's taken great care to teach me life skills such as cooking, money management, etc. and has made it a point to foster intellectual curiosity.

My dad is a good provider, but that's where his parenting success ends. He doesn't know how to relate to me and we can't have a conversation without it feeling extremely forced and awkward. I will never have much of a relationship with him.

Honestly, he is kind of inept at actually parenting. When I was 2 years old my mother had asked him to discipline me, intending for him to put me in timeout or something, but instead he slapped me across the face. He wasn't being sadistic or abusive, he just legitimately has no clue how to take care of a child, save for providing.

Here's another example; when I was 7 years old, we went golfing. While golfing, he randomly asked me if I liked girls. I was like "wha?" He follows up by asking "are you gay?". Yeah, that's how he talks to 7 year olds.
 
My dad was more strict and a dentist and my mom was more lenient.

She would sneak me and my brother candy if we were good since my dad would never ever think about buying us candy
 
Yeah i'm still not grown as im 18 but...

pros
-Lots of family time when i was young
-both worked hard to provide us with luxuries
-dad would take us to work (flooring) and we were able to see these huge penthouses and upper class buildings that i would never have been in otherwise
-Dad's work led to us meeting people from different cultures and helped us realize that there are assholes in every color
-very caring grandparents and extended family
-mom has MS and still worked to provide for us
-Never went cold or hungry
-wasn't abused or molested

i will add that my relationship with my mother has gone quite a bit downhill in the past couple years after my dad died, but i blame most of that on her boyfriend, who has had me arrested multiple times for arguing (nothing physical) with my mom and himself. He even got to the point where he had a bad day at work came home and called my mom a bitch so i defended her. He spit in my face, told me that if i did anything he'd have me arrested again and socked me in the face. I "blacked out" and ended up getting carried away to the point where they had to take him in an ambulance. My mom refused to leave him, so i left and have been couch surfing between friends and family and paying them to let me stay.

cons
-dad smoked and drank quite a bit
-wasn't watched close enough outside
-Not too much encouragement schoolwise
- Too much food so i was a little chubby for a while
 
My dad taught me to trust family over anyone else and my mother taught me to persevere.

My dad was never a good man, but even when I was a little kid he would believe me over anyone and it really meant alot to me.

My mom went through a horrid relationship with a piece of shit (my dad) and ended up having an amazing life later on with a great guy.
 
My dad worked a lot and we never hung out growing up so even nowadays we seem pretty distant from each other. My parents also took me out of public school in the 4th grade and stuck me into a Catholic School. It was a damn good public school too but my mom is a religious fanatic and wanted me in a private school. My grades were also shit compared to my siblings and my mom decided to experiment with ritalin with me.
 
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