You have to fight to the death against one of these....Who you taking on?

If I can wear boots, I can take out the python or the badger, or at least I have the best chance with those two. Barefoot, in the octagon, the only hope I have is to get the badger by the nape of its neck, head tight against or through the fence and break its neck. Even then I’m getting badly skunked and have some truly nasty wounds to deal with.

No way I’m getting an an enclosed space with any of the other animals though. So it’s a case of having a 99.99% chance of death versus 100%.
 
birds are incredibly stupid animals, ever heard the term Bird Brained ?

teh rest would at least put up a fight
 
Easily the Python.
It might get a bite or two in but it's not getting a lethal or crippling attack on me before I crush it's small skull or rip it's jaw off. The cassowary, kangaroo, honey badger and moose at least have a chance to get me on my back where I would be the most vulnerable to their attacks.
 
Nice list...there are no good options there, lol. These things almost always have some glaring oversight, but that's straight nope down the line.
 
I could take most of the animals on that list with a sturdy staff except the moose. I'm not sure I can take on a charging bull moose with a 12 gauge shotgun.

The moose is like that huge doofy looking guy you make fun of behind his back, but never to his face.
 
tangata motu'a said:
How do people think they are going to strangle a python? it literally is strong enough to wrap around and strangle a human, but you think your puny hands are going to put out enough strength to hurt that thing? Only way I would think is with some blunt force
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If you grab it, same as it grabbing you.

It didn't bite me! I'm holding the jaws!

But now it's coiling my arm and ribs and I can't feel that hand anymore.....
 
Might have to go with the Honey Badger. It might be the P4P champ, but its a lightweight.

#2 would be the cassowary. If you can survive the first kick or two, it would be easy to snap that pencil neck.
 
People keep saying you grab the honey badger by the neck, but they are forgetting its biggest advantage, and that is its incredibly loose skin. That is why lions even have such a hard time. they try to bite its neck, but they can still turn and get away from its bite in most cases. it isnt a dog that you are just going to snatch up

i should have left the moose off the list. i thought a person or two might say it. i should have gone with the komodo dragon instead
 
Woldog said:
Cassowaries can't attack you if you lay on the ground. I'm not sure how you win from there though.

Or is that Emus... awww fuck
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Actually, being on the ground is the worst place to be against a cassowary. Emus supposedly can only kick backwards, so maybe it is them

" Serious injuries resulting from cassowary attacks are most likely to occur if the person is crouching or is lying or has fallen on the ground. When confronted with a charging cassowary it’s clearly unwise to crouch or turn one’s back on the bird."
 
Honey badger easily.. rip jaws apart, eye poke it until you feel brain, grab it by the leg and slam it into a hard surface, choke it, shove fist down it's throat, stomp on it for a while etc.. lots of viable options..

Snake.. horrible set of teeth but pretty week skull generally.. very tough skin though.. if it strikes your face you're in a world of trouble but biting will help, can be distracted with poking eyes, if it doesn't get the face/neck at the first bit a reasonably fit guy should take it out..

Cassowary is maybe the best option if you're a kill or be killed guy.. jump it and pound it out/choke it before it can kick you.. just make sure to not fail or you'll bleed out because a small dinosaur kicked you repeatadly..

Kangaroo.. never seen a monster like that live.. can't really tell..

Moose.. just give me a bullet and i'll do it myself.. best chance is probably to jam your arm into it's mouth but i suspect the best thing you'll acheive by that is being the first guy to be eaten by a moose..

That would be a bit emberrasing..
 
Honey Badger. I'll probably have to offer up and arm to get shredded, but that's a better option than a kangaroo or Cassowary kick or a moose headbutt, or having your entire body strangled by a Python.
 
The bird followed by the badger.

pretty sure I could break the birds neck and with the badger I feel like I could probably pin it down for a choke, stomp out or maybe a tail smack against the ground type deal
 
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The Cassowary is too close to a dinosaur. Too unpredictable in their movements between the beak, claws, and wings.
Moose is too big. There's nothing I can do against it , especially in a small space.
Badger could rip up an achilles' tendon or something and just slowly go to work on me. Would also be an embarrassing loss.
The snake is 50/50.

I'd fook that roided up Kangaroo up though.
 
The bird….probably have some good bbq afterwards….
 
Don't kangaroos die from stress? I feel like that might be bullshit but I'll risk it. I'd take on the kangaroo and try to scare it to death.
 
Jacked kangaroo is fictitious, but seems brutal if it were real.
Moose and python are totally hopeless unarmed.

Honey badger size differential is tempting, but they are savage
Because of the toughness and looseness of their skin, honey badgers are very difficult to kill with dogs. Their skin is hard to penetrate, and its looseness allows them to twist and turn on their attackers when held. The only safe grip on a honey badger is on the back of the neck. The skin is also tough enough to resist several machete blows. The only sure way of killing them quickly is through a blow to the skull with a club or a shot to the head with a gun, as their skin is almost impervious to arrows and spears.
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Gotta go cassowary and hope to avoid getting 1-shotted.




Use some UFC training:


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