Why is legitimate Existential Crisis confused with depression ?

[Guestx]

Perhaps here in lies the difference. I am not willing to accept that my life is utterly meaningless.

Me either, at least not yet.

 

[Guestx]

There's a "movement" called deliberate living. It's where instead of coasting through life, going through the motions, you live with a purpose. Everything you do is deliberate and is with a purpose.

That sounds interesting. I'll have to look into it.

BTW, I've always liked your username. Is it a slight variation on Timewave Zero?

 

[sickc0d3r]

I'm genuinely surprised that so many people struggle with happiness because they feel their life needs to have some sort of meaning.
Personally, I have enough responsibilities (interfering with my play time) without the added pressure of a cosmic purpose that I am supposed to fulfill. I prefer the idea that life is my playground. It's liberating to me.
I hope you guys find something that makes you as happy as I am every day just to be alive and to be able to share good times with friends and loved ones, I honestly do.

 

[Mike]

Depression meds can make you feel exhausted?

I am on SSRI Prodin, I have been taking that since last august and at times I feel I don't want to wake up and yeah about the drinking thing I have been sober since August but every now and then I feel like I want to drink a few glasses.

There are many possible side effects. It could very well be my lifestyle or the depression itself as well though.

I feel you on the mood swings too. Some days I'm too sad or empty to even get mad. Other days I'm gritting my teeth all day to keep from losing my cool with all the rude, selfish shitheads I have to interact with when I leave the house.

 

[HUNTERMANIA]

Because everything has to be solved by administration of a pill, otherwise pharmaceutical companies can't make money off of life.

 

[Thurisaz]

"Bored! Make me happy!"
"Learn from those who are."
"No! They suck!"
"Ok, by all means continue then."

One can lead an ass to water but not drink for him.

 

[Guestx]

I'm genuinely surprised that so many people struggle with happiness because they feel their life needs to have some sort of meaning.
Personally, I have enough responsibilities (interfering with my play time) without the added pressure of a cosmic purpose that I am supposed to fulfill. I prefer the idea that life is my playground. It's liberating to me.
I hope you guys find something that makes you as happy as I am every day just to be alive and to be able to share good times with friends and loved ones, I honestly do.

A big barrier for me personally to just letting the good times roll is all the suffering in the world. It's hard for me to fully enjoy myself when I know there are a lot of other people out there who are miserable and having a terrible time.

And of course you can argue back with, "Well there's no sense in getting depressed about something you can't help." But that doesn't matter. The reality is still very troubling regardless.

 

[45ACP]

I've had thoughts that are kind of along those lines. An analogy that I've used in the past is that I live on a planet that's all mine. No one else inhabits it with me because I don't understand or connect with anyone else well enough for them to live on this same planet. My friends and family are on their own planets--and sometimes on the same planet with each other--and those planets are in orbit around mine. My closer friends/family are closer in their orbit, while the more of a stranger someone is the farther out they are in the universe.

I'd love to have the closeness that would come along with having someone on the same planet but I don't think that's possible at this point.

That's a really good analogy. I often feel the same way and it causes an agonizing feeling of loneliness.

The closest I've ever come to finding someone else on my "planet" was with a girl I used to date who is literally a psychopath by definition. We are complete opposites in many ways, and there's no chance I ever could've been happy in a long term committed relationship with her, but the way we understood and accepted each other is something I've never experienced before or since.

We remained friends after we stopped dating, but I eventually had to cut her out of my life as she was constantly dragging me down and I have enough shit on my plate already. Last time I saw her she was recovering from a suicide attempt.

 

[Mike]

"Bored! Make me happy!"
"Learn from those who are."
"No! They suck!"
"Ok, by all means continue then."

One can lead an ass to water but not drink for him.

That's not really at all what's being said itt.

 

[Guestx]

That's a really good analogy. I often feel the same way and it causes an agonizing feeling of loneliness.

The closest I've ever come to finding someone else on my "planet" was with a girl I used to date who is literally a psychopath by definition. We are complete opposites in many ways, and there's no chance I ever could've been happy in a long term committed relationship with her, but the way we understood and accepted each other is something I've never experienced before or since.

We remained friends after we stopped dating, but I eventually had to cut her out of my life as she was constantly dragging me down and I have enough shit on my plate already. Last time I saw her she was recovering from a suicide attempt.

Interesting. If she was literally a psychopath, then that means she wouldn't have any real feelings for you beyond those that satisfied her own needs. And no empathy either.

Sounds like an interesting experience, though. I have an especially hard time connecting with women. I have a couple of friends that I've known for several years, but women come and go.

 

[Mike]

I've had thoughts that are kind of along those lines. An analogy that I've used in the past is that I live on a planet that's all mine. No one else inhabits it with me because I don't understand or connect with anyone else well enough for them to live on this same planet. My friends and family are on their own planets--and sometimes on the same planet with each other--and those planets are in orbit around mine. My closer friends/family are closer in their orbit, while the more of a stranger someone is the farther out they are in the universe.

I'd love to have the closeness that would come along with having someone on the same planet but I don't think that's possible at this point.

This really resonates with me. I've always felt like I'm in my own world with very few people understanding me. When I met my ex-wife I felt like I had finally found someone that was on the same wavelength with me.


When it ended, and the way it ended, I just felt like fuck it I was wrong again. After that I gave up on finding someone I really belong with.

 

[leto1776]

TS needs to check his white cis male privilege. Seriously. Only well off white fold have "existential crises." The rest of us, including not so well off white folk, are too busy working to worry about dumb shit like that.

 

[Mike]

TS needs to check his white cis male privilege. Seriously. Only well off white fold have "existential crises." The rest of us, including not so well off white folk, are too busy working to worry about dumb shit like that.

Yeah no. People of all races and economic levels can have depression.

 

[sickc0d3r]

A big barrier for me personally to just letting the good times roll is all the suffering in the world. It's hard for me to fully enjoy myself when I know there are a lot of other people out there who are miserable and having a terrible time.

And of course you can argue back with, "Well there's no sense in getting depressed about something you can't help." But that doesn't matter. The reality is still very troubling regardless.

I honestly get that. But the thing is, whether it is an easy thing to dismiss or not, it is nevertheless a problem that only exists in your mind. It's a control issue. You don't have to be callous and uncaring, hell you can find happiness by dedicating your free time to helping people, and many do, but (to quote the esteemed Mr. Pacino) you don't have to carry that bag of bricks around with you all the time. You can set it down whenever you want.
Saying all that I realize there are chemicals at play in depression and if you're suffering from something like that it requires professional help, not some dummy like me telling you what he thinks. Best of luck to you and all my fellow sherdoggers who deal with this kind of problem.

 

[leto1776]

Yeah no. People of all races and economic levels can have depression.

I was more referring to him calling it an existential crisis. I know about real depression

 

[Mike]

I was more referring to him calling it an existential crisis. I know about real depression

Fair enough, I was just cutting out the middle man I guess. Anyone that is thinking about existential despair is dealing with clinical depression imo.

 

[Guestx]

This really resonates with me. I've always felt like I'm in my own world with very few people understanding me. When I met my ex-wife I felt like I had finally found someone that was on the same wavelength with me.

When it ended, and the way it ended, I just felt like fuck it I was wrong again. After that I gave up on finding someone I really belong with.

Yeah, I am pretty much over the idea of finding someone who I'm going to be right there with in lockstep--my soulmate, if you will. It's not that I don't want that, I just don't think it exists, at least not for me.

I do hope to eventually find someone that I can be happy living my life with, but even that possibility seems a bit remote right now. Not only am I busy with other shit, but whenever I get into a relationship I immediately start panicking and want my freedom back. The last real, true relationship I was in was in 2009.

 

[Mike]

Yeah, I am pretty much over the idea of finding someone who I'm going to be right there with in lockstep--my soulmate, if you will. It's not that I don't want that, I just don't think it exists, at least not for me.

I do hope to eventually find someone that I can be happy living my life with, but even that possibility seems a bit remote right now. Not only am I busy with other shit, but whenever I get into a relationship I immediately start panicking and want my freedom back. The last real, true relationship I was in was in 2009.

Yeah my experience in relationships and observing the relationships of others has left me pretty jaded. Now that I'm older I know a lot of people that are divorced, or just resigned to unhappy marriages.


Even the ones that say they're happy and everything is great seem to be lying.

 

[45ACP]

Interesting. If she was literally a psychopath, then that means she wouldn't have any real feelings for you beyond those that satisfied her own needs. And no empathy either.

Sounds like an interesting experience, though. I have an especially hard time connecting with women. I have a couple of friends that I've known for several years, but women come and go.

Interesting indeed.

Yep, that's the irony of it all. When it really came down to it, she couldn't have cared less about me (or anyone else for that matter) yet we had this intrinsic understanding of each other that led to a level of communication and openness that I've never experienced with anyone else in my life.

There was a short period after we split up where I became determined to "fix" her, partly because I really did love and care for her and wanted to see her happy, but also because I saw so much potential in her and us as a couple because of the connection we had. I quickly realized there was nothing I could do to help and that my efforts were not only unappreciated but were taking a toll on my own mental and emotional well being.

It's really a pretty sad story but I've learned a lot and became a better person because of it. There are a lot of positive changes I made in my life that wouldn't have happened had the two of us not crossed paths.

 

[Deleted member 409801]

Fair enough, I was just cutting out the middle man I guess. Anyone that is thinking about existential despair is dealing with clinical depression imo.

Has the TS come to that realization though? Last I gathered His shrink thinks he's depressed and he just thinks he's a realist. he dismisses his malaise as a " normal " reaction to a pointless world , even citing the reason for " normal " people's happiness as " ignorance " ......so yeah , unless Jesus comes back or figures the universe out on the can one morning, he's probably doomed to stay in the same rut . Perspective ( and maybe brain chemistry) needs adjustment