Why is legitimate Existential Crisis confused with depression ?

Discussion in 'Mayberry Lounge' started by Coffee79, Feb 10, 2016.

  1. Coffee79

    Coffee79 Double Yellow Card Double Yellow Card

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    I've been in/out of of therapy for a several years. At face value, I have a very good life; good job, lovely girlfriend, great family, great up bringing, and good friends. I'm 36 years old.

    But around the age of 25, I began feeling exhaustion with life - in that I started asking myself, Is this it ? Work, sex, meet with buddies, hang out with girlfriend, rinse and repeat ? I began looking into the religions, and frankly, they're all 100% BS so please don't bother by telling me Try Jesus.

    I don't believe in God or an afterlife - this is it. I have a few more decades on this planet and I'm bored out of my mind. I used to drink - a lot. But even that has lost its appeal. Television shows that I watched with earnest in my youth seem boring. TV really does suck these days - no heart or plot. Once in a rare while I'll find a movie that I can really get lost in without looking at my smart phone every three mins such as Sideways or The Big Lewbowski.

    I've been diagnosed as having mild depression/anxiety/OCD and I have taken the meds. But they ultimately don't work because all they do is suppress my emotions. Inside, the haunting reality of the meaningless of life keeps striking me in the face and I feel as lost, confused, bored, and frustrated as ever.

    I keep telling the doctors the same thing: I'M NOT DEPRESSED. I'M UTTERLY BORED WITH LIFE ! They keep telling me the latter is a false conclusion of the former, but I just don't buy it.

    I don't value needing a big car, or house. I enjoy my job but after a while it's all routine. I feel all I'm doing is just wasting my time until I am no longer. That's what we all do. And if you're going to tell me Go volunteer or do charity, THAT'S NOT REAL MEANING. That's, again, something I'm just doing because I ultimately have no idea why I exist, why the Universe exists, or why there is not nothing.

    And there it is: WHY IS THERE NOT NOTHING ? Why is there anything ? Until this question can be answered, how I can possibly be asked to care about anything else ?
     
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  2. thebluerider

    thebluerider caelgender ftw

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    sorry about all this, but since you are convinced that you are correct, i got nothing for you. you sound depressed btw
     
  3. Organic Damage

    Organic Damage Vantablack belt

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    Because only people who are anxious and depressed ruminate about that stuff instead of enjoying the moment.

    Not saying I disagree (I'm often one of those aforementioned people)
     
  4. MoparOrNoCar

    MoparOrNoCar Black Belt

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    We're just animals man. The meaning of life is to not die. That's basically it. We've evolved so much that we can think deeper into it but if you go searching for some pie in the sky, you'll never find it.

    My suggestion is to find a hobby that you enjoy and dedicate a lot of your time to it. Are you competitive? Go race something or play a sport. There have to be things out there that give you a rush. Go figure out what those things are and do them. Build something and be proud of your creation. There are so many things to do, you just haven't tapped into them yet. Put more effort into this and less effort into the doom and gloom of feeling like life is pointless and you might wind up doing a bunch of things that make you happy.
     
  5. Coffee79

    Coffee79 Double Yellow Card Double Yellow Card

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    But how many meds do I need to take before the question of Why does the Universe Exist ? gets answered ? You guys sound like my shrink who keeps harping on the idea that my depression is causing me to lose interest in this life. But how is this proven so ? How many more times do I need to have sex, or go drinking, or watch a tv show, or do whatever the hell it is that I've done a thousands plus times before it stops getting repetitive ?

    Sex, I will concede is still the great escape for me. But that seems so damn shallow and empty - it's like a drug and once I'm done, the boredom and meaningless of life resumes its barrage on my senses.
     
    Last edited: Feb 10, 2016
  6. Higus

    Higus Gold Belt

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    This is helpful context for some of your war room posts.
     
  7. Coffee79

    Coffee79 Double Yellow Card Double Yellow Card

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    But do you concede all these hobbies I may do are ultimately a distraction and don't really give true meaning ? It's like I'm just finding something to do so I don't think about the meaningless of life.
     
  8. WorldofWarcraft

    WorldofWarcraft Holy Paladin Banned

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    Have you tried playing World of Warcraft?
     
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  9. Coffee79

    Coffee79 Double Yellow Card Double Yellow Card

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    That is another attempt at distraction, no ? That's just avoiding my real dilemma of trying to know my place in this Universe and the true meaning of my existence.
     
  10. Jesus Freak

    Jesus Freak Banned Double Yellow Card

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    Dang...this sounds more depressing than the OP's story!
     
  11. drstrangelov

    drstrangelov Hey.

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    You seem depressed... Also self aggrandizing and boring. Life doesn't owe you shit, if you're not able to enjoy yourself, that's a product of your poor choices. Don't go around in pity for yourself, don't try to fool yourself into believing you're going through something unique and difficult. Everybody questions this shit, most people have the good sense to use that uncertainty to drive them to new and interesting things.
     
  12. groo

    groo Gold Belt

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    Why do you need a purpose in life handed to you from an external source? Essentially we all live, do some stuff, then die. Some people can handle that reality, some turn to religion, and some like you get depressed over it. I don't have an answer for you, but do wonder why you need meaning.
     
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  13. Coffee79

    Coffee79 Double Yellow Card Double Yellow Card

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    What are these "things" and of what ultimate meaning will they provide ? You don't think I've tried to enjoy new hobbies or exercise more ? I've tried everything - but it takes very little time while I'm doing them to realize I'm just doing them in order to not be bored. They are all just distractions and not an answer to why we exist.
     
  14. Coffee79

    Coffee79 Double Yellow Card Double Yellow Card

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    Because without meaning, it's all pointless. The worst part is, it's not like I'm holding onto hope that life has a meaning. I've accepted existence/life is meaningless. I'm just trying to somehow try and get through this life being happy knowing that everything I'm doing is without meaning.
     
  15. Nowhere Fast

    Nowhere Fast Chules' Emotional Hostage.

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    TV doesn't suck these days ffs. Never been better at the high end, imo.
     
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  16. ShadBo

    ShadBo Brown Belt Platinum Member

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    There is no true meaning of life. The best you can do is enjoy yourself as much as you can, build meaningful relationships, and don't get too hung up on questions that may never be answered.

    Depression can certainly lead a person to the conclusion that "life is meaningless." I don't know if medication is the solution, but addressing the depression will certainly improve your outlook.

    That's why hobbies are so valuable. They occupy the time you would otherwise waste contemplating nonsense about the universe and your place in it.
     
  17. Irenaeus

    Irenaeus Black Belt

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    Meaning is a subjective term, and by definition not universal. Decide who you want to make an imprint on and create your own meaning accordingly.

    If you find hobbies, interests, career or self-improvement to be unfulfilling, I suggest you try to do something meaningful for others. Children, charity, politics, or creating something that will impact other lives. Something that will increase your footprint in time. Having children the most usual answer that people find for themselves, as it immediately creates something that will carry on after you're gone.
     
  18. Scerpi

    Scerpi Black Belt

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    Completely disagree.

    Why the fuck does something have to have meaning to be important, really? Seriously, think about it.

    Some of the best and most enjoyable things in life have no meaning what-so-ever. They are fun and pleasurable because there is no real meaning to them.

    Fishing on the beach
    Coffee on the back porch on a crisp morning
    Hiking
    Riding a bike
    Playing a video game
    Movies/TV

    Nature and life itself is simply amazing on it's own accord, regardless of your religion (or lack of it). No matter your beliefs, it's flat out incredible that we are where we are at this point in history.

    In fact, the search for the meaning of life could be fulfilling journey on it's own. I'm sure the meaning is different for everyone and everything out there.
     
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  19. Tee Dee Pee

    Tee Dee Pee Orange Belt

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    You've written off God and have chosen to trust yourself as your own highest authority. You know that death looms and you know you are completely incapable of fending it off. I can understand why you feel the way you feel. Existential crisis might not be depression, but it can certainly cause it. I guess the real question is why do you care? Are you desperate for something? Why should we care?
     
  20. orangecuse

    orangecuse Gold Belt

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    If you believe this is it and like most who do you spend you entire life on the internet mostly posting and reading meaningless tripe, work the nine to five grind, whining about petty stuff in life, IMO you're as pathetic, stupid and a waste of space as whoever you think are the dumbest fundamentalist churchgoers.

    WTF? So this it and you spend your days on sherdog, spend your days talking to some other regular person about your problems? Um there's grand canyons, amazing mountains and islands, jungles, communes, villages in Africa you can help, jungles, sky diving, all kinds of beautiful landscapes, different types of people, animals to see and meet and so many varied experience out there.

    Yet all these whiny internet atheist clowns do none of that shit. They listen to college professors on what they're supposed to be and what life is .They post meaningless stuff on the internet, fucking people whose lives are video games and the next hot release, they laugh at someone else spaghetti monster idea and have less happiness and meaning then the most judgmental ingorant believer in God.

    Can someone explain to me why all that is not more pathetic, stupid and sad? There's nothing besides this? Why the F do you have some shit job, look at your internet activities and post. I bet most of these don't even go outside for a walk and haven't even explored the town or city they will spend the most of their lives in. Dude this is it, right? How is that not ten time more retarded then the folks that listen to the shady televangelist and get something out of it?
     

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