Here are some things you should and shouldn't do while dining at Brazilian Steakhouses.
These places have all you can eat steaks & salad options.
1) Do not eat from the salad bar unless they have hot peppers or onions.
The waiters there will encourage you to eat from the salad bar as soon as you sit down.
This is pure deception on their part to get you to eat less meat.
Hot peppers and onions are the only suggestions to digest your food quicker.
2) When a Gaúcho comes by your table with meat, refuse the cheapest items they offer.
Items like chicken thighs, beef ribs, and pork whatever are fillers
You came to a steakhouse, not Dennys.
3) Picanha is Top Serloin
It is NOT the best cut of meat. Don't let those idiots fool into thinking that Picanha came from heaven and fell onto your plate.
4) Avoid bottom Serloin
This is also known as Tri-Tip
This is the type of steak that people eat on a budget.
5) Make a request for your favorite meats
Ribeye & Filet Mignon are the best choices.
If they don't serve either one, then you get up from your table and leave!!
That place is worst than McDonald's!!!
6) Ask for the big Kahuna
Who the hell wants to eat just a tiny slice of ribeye?
Fuck that! You ask them for the whole cut on their serving stick.
Tell them you are offended they think you are Somalian. (Somalians hardly eat and have small stomachs)
7) DO NOT EAT DESSERT!!!!
This is the worst punishment for your body.
Eating a large amount of sugar after eating a large amount of protein will convert into fat.
People will call you tubby or Fat Albert when you go back to work.