brain freeze ->rub the roof of your mouth with your tongue
the spins from being drunk -> have both feet planted and place a hand or 2 on a stable surface like a table to regain your polarity.
light headed from standing up too fast -> tense your abs + breath
hickups -> right when u notice them, hands above head and hold breath
best bacon -> dont cook on stove. oven @ 350 degrees (F) for 30min (or until the fat is a golden brown) . hassle free, best tasting, and can cook shirtless.
piss off loved ones at inappropriate times -> if a friend/family/co-worker is looking for their phone, and they ask you to call it, simply start to yell out "OH <insert name here>'s phone, where are you? come out come out where ever you are"