Strange things your kids have said

[Dinkin_Flicka]

My kid is 2 1/2 and says weird stuff and has totally random requests. He sleeps with a stuffed Mickey Mouse, and this morning at 2:30 a.m. he starts crying out on the baby montior for mommy/daddy. I go in the room and he looks at me and says "Daddy, you push Mickey's feet down", and I can see him trying to stuff the feet inbetween the bed and the frame. So I push his feet inbtween the mattress, he looks at it satisfied and goes right back to sleep.

Thanks kid, that's exactly what I needed at 2:30 this morning.

 

[H33ZY]

My sister once told me when she was on the toilet to pee, her 3-year old son saw and was like
"no mommy, you have to stand"
"mommy doesn't have a tete so she sits down"
"oh ok, only hair."

LOL

 

[n...not crazy]

Not really strange, but my 3-year old daughter asked me what light was made out of.

I dare you to try and explain that to a 3-year old, lol. "Let me tell you about electromagnetic waves and wave/particle duality, sweetie. Got a few minutes?"

 

[KOCowboy]

My sister once told me when she was on the toilet to pee, her 3-year old son saw and was like
"no mommy, you have to stand"
"mommy doesn't have a tete so she sits down"
"oh ok, only hair."

LOL

eww yuck



my youngest who was five at the time told my wife "Mommy after a haircut i feel like balls."

 

[CreepingTom]

My brother and I were carrying his kids in after a bbq. I ate a gang of food and had to blow it up. We put the kids in bed and as we're walking out, I tell my brother "fuck I ate too much. I gotta take a fat shit".

Fast forward about 2 weeks. We're at a restaurant and and my nephew is sitting next to me, he's 6 at the time. Our orders are getting placed out. I had a prime rib and it was huge and the baked potato was huge too. As the waitress was putting my rib down, my nephew starts looking at it and at me..back and forth. Right before the waitress finishes putting the potato down, my nephew looks up at me and says in that loud 6 year old high pitched voice... "If you eat all that you're going to have to take a fat shit huh?".

 

[goleta83**]

these are weak

 

[John Stockton]

"Mommy, do you have a shy vagina?"
"Uh...no...why?"
"Because it's hiding behind all that hair"