Should I get a place with my girl and her kid?

[Oregonmma]

Have you spent a lot of time around this kid?

Out of all the factors you mentioned, cohabitating and perhaps parenting and or dealing with the kid will be your biggest factor by far. Do you see yourself dealing with this for the long term?

Can you get a 2bd/2ba in your same apartment complex (even if its pricier than $2k) that you can arrange a short term lease for a couple of months to try it out?

She has to reside in the same state as her baby daddy so we couldn't do that unfortunately.

 

[Oregonmma]

Gotta be careful with a mom, it's delicate as you have already learned.

Before the finances I would ask you do you love this woman? Can you see it working out long term? If yes then go for it and make the most of the opportunity to be in the child's life.

If you don't see it working out long term then it is not worth it. The hassle of ending it would outweigh any saving you might gain.

I do love her and I'm not one to plan out a long term plan for being with someone so I just kind of go with the flow. With that being said I do see the potential to be with her long time more than anyone else I've been with for a long time

 

[Kowboy On Sherdog]

 

[Takes Two To Tango]

From looking at your pros and cons. I'd say your pros outweighs your cons.

 

[Phlog]

Pretty shit for the kid for you to be gambling their upbringing on you being a long-term success with a girl you've been with for 4 months.

For me moving in to being a father figure for a kid is the same commitment as getting married. Not something I'd do after 4 months, for me it's a couple of years to get past the honeymoon stage of the relationship.

 

[deadshot138]

Could still happen if I want it to

Sounds like you're not even into the chick and just want a larger place to stay with a roommate who fucks you

 

[rckoltrane]

Sex on the reg in cohabitation is a scam. Beware the bait and switch. Plus are you sure you wanna live with a child?

 

[aerius]

The kid will make you want to kill yourself. Either that or you end up going on a killing spree.

 

[Osculater]

Congrats on being a step-dad

 

[Oregonmma]

Sounds like you're not even into the chick and just want a larger place to stay with a roommate who fucks you

What's wrong with that? I got my pick at the moment and I have lost interest in the other girl

 

[Oregonmma]

Pretty shit for the kid for you to be gambling their upbringing on you being a long-term success with a girl you've been with for 4 months.

For me moving in to being a father figure for a kid is the same commitment as getting married. Not something I'd do after 4 months, for me it's a couple of years to get past the honeymoon stage of the relationship.

Kid wouldn't even remember me if we lived together for a year and I decided it wasn't for me

 

[Volador]

You’re discussing this from a purely pragmatic/mechanical POV but totally avoiding discussing how you feel about moving with someone you’ve only fated for 4 months, who will probably want you to fill some fatherly role at some point. iMO this should be your main concern over saving $750 a month.

 

[Tone C]

I'd say no because you don't even know how old the kid is...

2/3, years old...

 

[lsa]

You’re discussing this from a purely pragmatic/mechanical POV but totally avoiding discussing how you feel about moving with someone you’ve only fated for 4 months, who will probably want you to fill some fatherly role at some point. iMO this should be your main concern over saving $750 a month.

Fated : "Condemned to death or destruction; doomed."

 

[deadshot138]

What's wrong with that? I got my pick at the moment and I have lost interest in the other girl

You should just sign the new lease. You're incredibly selfish.

 

[djacobox372]

Does the kid have a father that already pays child support?

Because if not, and you live together she can sue you for child support when you break up.

 

[Oregonmma]

You should just sign the new lease. You're incredibly selfish.

Nothing selfish about ending a long distance relationship.

 

[Michaelangelo]

Pack your bags TS and get your ass to Washington

 

[Oregonmma]

Does the kid have a father that already pays child support?

Because if not, and you live together she can sue you for child support when you break up.

Yeah he does and he has the kid every other week

 

[boingyman]

A LOT of factors to consider, but from the looks of this thread so far I would say it's likely not a great idea unless you both want to take the relationship to another level. Good luck.