Safe to say marriage means far less than it used to?

Discussion in 'Mayberry Lounge' started by mommas homeboy, Jun 7, 2014.

  1. mommas homeboy

    mommas homeboy cautiously optimistic

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    Does the fact that married people get divorced just like people who are not married break up, prove that marriage doesn't even mean much any anymore?

    As I see it, other than the legal ramifications, getting married does not mean two people love each other or are more committed to each other more than two people who are not married but are dating exclusively.

    What else would explain divorce being so popular, and marriage vows that mean nothing?
     
  2. FEDORER

    FEDORER Green Belt

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    It does in Western society. But I'am from a cultural where marriage is honoured and I barely know anyone in my community that is divorced.
     
  3. BringCodyBack

    BringCodyBack Green Belt

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  4. new_mexico1

    new_mexico1 Super Chile

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    Did marriage ever mean that two people loved each other, etc. etc.?
     
  5. JayElectra

    JayElectra Paper Belt Banned

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    I have no idea why people are surprised that the divorce rate is so high. People fuck up everything else, why are they surprised that two people can't find a way to get along living that close together? When there is no significant social stigma around divorce, people should expect that it would be high, I think. It's not a sign of social decay or any other bullshit. It's just the reality of people living together.
     
  6. mommas homeboy

    mommas homeboy cautiously optimistic

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    I think it did about 50 years ago, but it means nothing now. I think many people get married nowadays just so they can have a wedding.
     
  7. knuckleroll**

    knuckleroll** Purple Belt

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    marriage means jack shit to a lot of people including myself
     
  8. Seano

    Seano Hands of bone

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    Scoff if you will but when you took religion out of the equasion, marriage became more about girls having a big party where people pay attention to them .

    Nothing means much anymore now that we have no morals as a society.
     
  9. Seano

    Seano Hands of bone

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    Its because marriage used to be considered permanent so people didn't jump into it so blindly.

    Today, people get engaged after dating for 3 months.
     
  10. CrazyN8

    CrazyN8 Custom Title

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    It means whatever you want it to mean. If you want it to be a flimsy contract that you opt out of when it gets tough than that's it. If you actually know what love is and make the sacrifice it can be a beautiful gesture among partners.
     
  11. mommas homeboy

    mommas homeboy cautiously optimistic

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    So if it's just the reality of people living together, why was it so uncommon about 50 years ago? And why do people say vows they don't believe in and will not honor?

    The idea that people will not get along after a certain point is perfectly understandable, but the bullshit two people tell each other on their wedding day has become a complete joke, that's all I'm saying. The vows below should include a phrase saying, "unless we get tired of each other and it becomes too much work, than we'll just get divorced."

    I, (name), take you (name), to be my (wife/husband), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part.

    Traditional Wedding Vows 2
    I, (name), take you, (name), to be my [opt: lawfully wedded] (husband/wife), my constant friend, my faithful partner and my love from this day forward. In the presence of God, our family and friends, I offer you my solemn vow to be your faithful partner in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, and in joy as well as in sorrow. I promise to love you unconditionally, to support you in your goals, to honor and respect you, to laugh with you and cry with you, and to cherish you for as long as we both shall live.
     
  12. CrazyN8

    CrazyN8 Custom Title

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    Keep in mind that although the rate is high, it is exaggerated. It just counts the numbers, not taking into account people that tend to marry and divorce a lot.
     
  13. mommas homeboy

    mommas homeboy cautiously optimistic

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    The sad truth. I think marriage vows need to become more modernized to reflect our current culture.
     
  14. Tater Raider

    Tater Raider Green Belt

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    It means alot to me. My parents never divorced , my wife's parents are not divorced, my grandparents on both sides never divorced. My wife's Grandparents on both sides never divorced. I never really thought about that before but it really does play a big part in how I view marriage. I also was with my wife for 4-5 years before I asked her to marry me.
     
  15. FEDORER

    FEDORER Green Belt

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    [​IMG]
     
  16. Seano

    Seano Hands of bone

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    Because it used to be shameful.

    People forget than marriage was about the creation of a family unit contracted before God. (i really don't care if thats not your belief and you're an atheist BTW, thats not the point to those reading this)

    Back when people believed in God and cared more about taking care of their family than getting some fresh ass, marriage was taken more seriously.

    MArriage means nothing today. Its basically a legal term at this point.
     
  17. Terror Zone

    Terror Zone Banned Banned

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    Nah, it's the reality of it having become insanely easy for women to file for divorce and then get paid for it.
     
  18. Leagon

    Leagon Silver Belt

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    Agreed. I don't think marriage has ever meant that two people loved each other forever and unconditionally. Mistresses have played a huge part of marriage history.

    But the commitment has definitely been removed from the equation. Not the sexual fidelity commitment necessarily, but the "life partner" commitment. People used to marry for reasons other than love (or, rather, reasons in addition to love), though, and so it was easier to stay together if you no longer loved, or even liked the person. Now, when the love is gone, people think the relationship is over.

    As a culture, we need to redefine marriage or do away with it altogether.
     
  19. mommas homeboy

    mommas homeboy cautiously optimistic

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    We live in a society where the self trumps everything else. All people care abut is their own pleasure and immediate gratification. Fresh meat is all the rage these days. Marriage to an aging wife who isn't the hot little vixen she once was? Why on Earth would anybody want that?
     
  20. Ocean Chief

    Ocean Chief Black Belt

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    lol women file for divorce more often than men.
     

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