relationship advice please: how to friendzone nicely?

[Eazy123]

Tell them you post on sherdog. That will keep your virginity safe

 

[blokeybloke]

dearest mayberry,

through the years
through the tears
through the stories of ipads
i have become accustomed

this is the place where caring people reside

not in a weak way
but rather
the mayberry is filled with wise relationship gurus

ok, occasionally there's bro posting
but that's cos you're internet bros
right?

I HAVE A PROBLEM
(and i don't think it can be fixed by cowbell)



a friend who i like hanging out with
i think they 'like' me
i don't think i 'like' them back

how do i get them to JUST chill?

maybe one day, but


any thoughts?

What attributes does this guy have that makes you want to hang out & be around him?

What attributes does this guy lack that makes you not want to share your inner freak with him?

 

[Don Quixote]

so just don't bring it then?

Yes do. If she likes you she'll most likely be hurt, the best you can do is tell her your sorry. I really don't see any other way around it.

 

[LatFlare]

dearest mayberry,

through the years
through the tears
through the stories of ipads
i have become accustomed

this is the place where caring people reside

not in a weak way
but rather
the mayberry is filled with wise relationship gurus

ok, occasionally there's bro posting
but that's cos you're internet bros
right?

I HAVE A PROBLEM
(and i don't think it can be fixed by cowbell)



a friend who i like hanging out with
i think they 'like' me
i don't think i 'like' them back

how do i get them to JUST chill?

maybe one day, but


any thoughts?

Kill yourself

 

[FightsFTW]

maybe i misjudged mayberry
some nice info and thoughts
mixed with lots of vitriol
which always suggests butthurt
which always suggests insecurity
which is confusing



i thought emotional stability was the forte here
people unashamed to be "men"
ask a simple honest question and get called 'attention seeker'

wow - isn't that akin to 'slut shaming'
and THIS is why we can't be friends perhaps...
i never brought up gender
i'm sure my question applies to many situations

shame on the dicks
(hopefully you know who you are)
but you probably have no insight
and this might explain your real lonliness

That's usually how it is in the Mayberry, hell on all of sherdog. Surprised you didn't know. Threads looking for genuine advice or just made to spark discussion or tell of a problem will have a few genuine replies, but will also attract the dicks and trolls just looking to shit on you and blame you for every situation. Best thing to do is ignore the garbage and take in the genuine comments.

As for the OP, honestly I don't think there's an easy way. I'm guessing they haven't made a solid move yet, probably just putting plans in motion to potentially make a move in the near future. When it happens, you just have to be honest, you don't see them that way, if it kills the friendship then it sucks, but it happens. You'll both get over it.

The only way I think MAYBE could make them get the hint, is if you drop clues during convo every once in awhile, what kind of clues is up to you. Either way if they like you that much, its gonna hurt them either way. I will add though that I'm in a somewhat similar situation, she has been making it more and more apparent that she wants me around and seeks me out, I fear I may have to have that talk myself. Rejecting a person is never easy unless you're a dick.

 

[HUNTERMANIA]

I didn't read the OP just now, but I did last night and I don't remember this person being your boss? I wouldn't be too nice about it because even if you're just normally friendly, the guy is gonna misinterpret it if he likes you. Stop talking to him, if you can.

 

[Adamant]

Why not just casually throw out a comment about how much you enjoy being single?

 

[Twelve75]

you're either 16 yourself or a 40 year old forever alone TRP type. 16 years old option is slightly less tragic

TRP ? Tentacle Rape Porn ? I know some sherdoggers are a bit freaky,but surely no one here is into that ?

 

[Hatredcopter]

Why not just casually throw out a comment about how much you enjoy being single?

this is something that has been said
a few times
not even casually

 

[Twelve75]

this is something that has been said
a few times
not even casually

I think you need to get pregnant,he'll back off for sure.

 

[Dreaming Dead]

What can I say, when you have one person having romantic feelings to the other and the other doesn't have them - there can't be friendship in this. I've been on both sides. Actually I can't say I was friendzoned, more like rejected. @AmbivalenceKing formulated it very well.

And I think it's respectful to tell straight away you don't like the person or at least cut contacts with him If you don't want to be too direct - that's the honest way, in my eyes. You save the other person the trouble. I totally agree with this guy:

That's some cold shit. Girls know when the guy has feelings, you OP are another example. Girls smell it from miles away. And you can end it for the poor guy, but instead you are playing with his feelings out of some false moral concepts that you don't want to ruin the friendship. Some bitches manipulate and take advantages for themselves. Other have these altruistic intentions, like you probably. But in both cases everything is doomed already, you're just prolonging it. Even the biggest losers get it at some point and they might develop some very negative feelings towards you even If you didn't mean them bad. So, be honest, and tell them straight up or cut contacts with them, like I said in the beginning. That's my view on things.

Look, if you want to keep the 'friendship' you have to realize that the longer you keep the bond as is, the stronger feelings will become. You're literally pussy footing your way so that it's most beneficial to YOUR feelings. Forget about yourself for one God damn second.

Friendship was never there to begin with. If there is sexual attraction on either side, friendship is just an excuse to be in desired person's vicinity.

If you really want to remain friends with this person:

Ask yourself why? If it's because you enjoy the attention, end the friendship.

If it's because this person does stuff for you, like fix your sink or help you move, he's doing that because of his attraction for you and you need to end the friendship and stop taking advantage

If you want to be this person's friend because you genuinely enjoy their company, think they have interesting things to say and do, and/or are just generally good for a laugh then you should say flat out "I am not interested in you and never will be, I know that hurts to hear, here is a bottle of whiskey to help you get over it, and I will try to hook you up with someone else if you want to stay friends" and then leave the ball in his court.

If you actually like and respect the person than tell them the truth. Don't lie to try and spare their feelings. When people do that they are usually just trying to protect their own image in the other person's mind. It's an ego move, you want to reject them and still have them like you.

TS, these posts may bear some harsh truths, but there's no malice behind them. Great advice, all of them.

Naturally. It is one of the many reasons why true men make their intentions known from the get-go. You don't even have to be strict or formal about the way you do it, either. Just let the girl know you're interested in her and see where you go from there. At worst you'll get rejected, at best you'll end up with her. Why people hesitate to apply this approach is beyond me.

But hey, who am I to talk? My stellar, unshakable confidence always helped me tremendously. When you truly believe you're the chosen one, woman rejecting you makes you feel sorry for her since you're fully aware of what you have to offer as a person and know for a fact she will be missing out on a lot.

And this is some great general relationship advice for men too.

 

[trustno1]

TS, these posts may bear some harsh truths, but there's no malice behind them. Great advice, all of them.


And this is some great general relationship advice for men too.

Thanks, man. There were some great serious comments here. Though, I think OP turned out to be some crappy unfunny wannabe troll. If that's the case, joke's on him/her. These advises can be useful for anyone reading the thread so it's all cool.

 

[Thai Otoshi]

I recently friendzoned a girl I know.

It's pretty easy. Tell her you just want to be friends, and tell her why in the most respectful manner possible. Most people (especially girls) make it more complicated than it has to be.

 

[Adamant]

this is something that has been said
a few times
not even casually

Just play dumb then. The more she advances, the more you should act totally oblivious.

 

[GordoBarraBJJ]

On first glance I read (mistook) your username as HatredPooper.

 

[cmw43]

Don't worry, you're a Sherdogger you'll easily friendzone yourself.

 

[Pugilistic]

Paging @Pugilistic because he is an expert on wimminz and relationships

Pff, I never have this problem because I get friend zoned by every women the moment I walk in the room.

 

[j123]

Pff, I never have this problem because I get friend zoned by every women the moment I walk in the room.

So much privilege, some tards can't even become friends with their oneitis

 

[Pugilistic]

So much privilege, some tards can't even become friends with their oneitis

#manletpriviledge

I don’t think I can be friends with the café girl though

 

[Hatredcopter]

TS, these posts may bear some harsh truths, but there's no malice behind them. Great advice, all of them

lies
there was much malice
much butthurt
much heartburn
or break

On first glance I read (mistook) your username as HatredPooper.

fairly accurate

________________________​

finale


possibly the best music video ever

subject breached
'cowardly' via text
mentioned the world platonic
AND THE FLOODGATES OPENED

my suspicions were correct
but the air is now clear
and they apologised for being
awkward



but "please can we be friends?!"
and all is right with the world?
for sure