Relationships Parents would you do this with your kids?

[ChosenOne]

As a parent who has pulled a drowning kid out of an ocean absolutely f*cking not. Screw that mom and anybody who does that. Almost drowning is traumatic and having your parent whom you should be able to trust fling you in a pool and leave you desperately struggle for breath is borderline abuse. Take your kids to normal swim classes instead and teach them like a normal person. That's what I did.

i think there are two main types of parents who would take this path.

The first, would be ones who are lazy and just do not want to invest an hour to teach a child this, in a way that was not traumatizing. The 'just get it over with', type.

The second, is the ones who see it as something they can flex over. 'Ya, i just tossed my kid in, and he was either going to sink or swim and look at him now'.

I don't think either are evil. One is lazy and other is thinking more about themselves than the child which is why they do not get the same result in another way.

 

[Vergilius]

i think there are two main types of parents who would take this path.

The first, would be ones who are lazy and just do not want to invest an hour to teach a child this, in a way that was not traumatizing. The 'just get it over with', type.

The second, is the ones who see it as something they can flex over. 'Ya, i just tossed my kid in, and he was either going to sink or swim and look at him now'.

I don't think either are evil. One is lazy and other is thinking more about themselves than the child which is why they do not get the same result in another way.

I've never ever heard of anything like this before, but judging by the comments this is not uncommon in America? It looks frickin' sadist to me. My 8 year old is a high-level swim talent for her age and got that way because we taught her to swim in a safe, fun environment and now she enjoys doing it. All my kids learned to swim like that and this winter, my oldest son and I have been cold water bathing regularly, enjoying ourselves and bonding. I 100% fail to see any benefit coming from just tossing a child in the water like that, which couldn't be gained in a better way. I really doubt my kids would be raring to go to the beach with me now if this was how I raised them.

 

[BoomStronk]

This isn't cool at all. No need for this. Teach the kid to swim, expose him to the water so he becomes comfortable there, but you don't need to fucking drill a trauma response.

If the kid has floated on his back before and can paddle, and has maybe even practiced holding his breath and dunking his head he's gonna do that if he ever falls into the water. You don't need to expose him to the experience of being terrified by his mom to improve his safety.

Some of yall are nuts

 

[BoomStronk]

Brb, gonna force feed my toddler a goat curry to fast-track his sophisticated multicultural palette.

 

[ChickenBrother]

My "herp derp" comment about if you're rich enough to afford a pool then you're rich enough to afford proper swimming lessons was a criticism of how she is teaching this child, not what she is teaching.
I highly doubt this is the most effective way of doing this.
I would personally be more interested in a making-sure-my-2-year-old-doesn't-have-access-to-a body-of-water-while-I"m-not-around-proofing so that I didn't have to worry about the whole drowning part.

Yeah, i don't get why anyone would film it and post it online. Again, my criticism is largely on HOW this is being done, not that it is being done.
I'm seeing the kid's head bounce against the pool's edge, so the whole thing looked like a shit show to me.
I've no issue with the idea of this training, (i question how beneficial it would be in a real life scenario though) but if you're going to do this, I don't understand why this would be the route one would take.
The videos posted by @chardog looked a lot more beneficial and a good way to get a child used to water.

IMO there's a lot of projection in this thread (perhaps also by me) by folks who don't know anything about the context of the OP vid. @ChosenOne posted a pic of some kid being dragged behind a motorboat and attributed it to me lol. I can't even begin to respond to that. Dragging a kid behind a motorboat is pointlessly risking his life so literally the opposite of the OP vid which shows a parent trying to drown proof her kid and potentially save his life.

I also said I did not take the OP approach with my kids because we waited until they were truly comfortable learning how to backfloat, which was around age 6 for both. But that is way too old if you have a pool in your yard. Most folks with pools don't have FU money and no matter how many reasonable (and unreasonable) precautions you take, you can't keep a determined kid away from something 100% of the time.

@ModernMatt described the danger of a kid who doesn't regularly practice in a pool. That was me and also my kids and like him, we had close calls when we failed to panic swim and were lucky to be rescued by an adult. When my 6 yo daughter was at a pool party, my wife literally had to jump into the pool in street clothes to rescue her because she fell off the inflatable raft and nearby kids didn't realize she was actually drowning. My daughter had a false sense of water confidence because she always wore a floatie or lifevest and refused to take them off whenever we took her to a pool. Even when we forced her to take off the floatie, she thought water was a game. Anytime an adult was in the pool with her (including the swim instructor we took her to every weekend for over a year), she had no fear of water and would laugh and smile while sinking because she just expected the adult to pull her up before she drowned. It took that experience of almost drowning for her to let me teach her how to backfloat in the HOA pool over the rest of the summer.

To those saying the OP vid approach is NEVER justifiable, I agree it's not ideal. In a perfect world every parent would have the time, money and schedule to put their kid in a drown proofing course as shown in @chardog's vids above. The two in our area were a 45 min drive away and required 4 sessions/week with a flat fee of $450 until your kid passed. Talking to other parents, some kids passed the float test in a week, some took 4 months. My daughter almost certainly would have broken that record.

 

[MrShady]

I've been around water my whole life, teaching babies, toddlers, teens, adults. I'd like to think I know my shit on this subject.

This woman reminds me of one of those people that will brag about their methods to others and think it's totally the right approach because they read about it from some book or article.

That kid definitely is traumatized and on a subconscious level he'll hate his mom for doing this.

There's better ways to teaching babies/toddlers swimming and water survival that won't traumatize them.

 

[ChosenOne]

IMO there's a lot of projection in this thread (perhaps also by me) by folks who don't know anything about the context of the OP vid. @ChosenOne posted a pic of some kid being dragged behind a motorboat and attributed it to me lol. I can't even begin to respond to that. Dragging a kid behind a motorboat is pointlessly risking his life so literally the opposite of the OP vid which shows a parent trying to drown proof her kid and potentially save his life.

I also said I did not take the OP approach with my kids because we waited until they were truly comfortable learning how to backfloat, which was around age 6 for both. But that is way too old if you have a pool in your yard. Most folks with pools don't have FU money and no matter how many reasonable (and unreasonable) precautions you take, you can't keep a determined kid away from something 100% of the time.

@ModernMatt described the danger of a kid who doesn't regularly practice in a pool. That was me and also my kids and like him, we had close calls when we failed to panic swim and were lucky to be rescued by an adult. When my 6 yo daughter was at a pool party, my wife literally had to jump into the pool in street clothes to rescue her because she fell off the inflatable raft and nearby kids didn't realize she was actually drowning. My daughter had a false sense of water confidence because she always wore a floatie or lifevest and refused to take them off whenever we took her to a pool. Even when we forced her to take off the floatie, she thought water was a game. Anytime an adult was in the pool with her (including the swim instructor we took her to every weekend for over a year), she had no fear of water and would laugh and smile while sinking because she just expected the adult to pull her up before she drowned. It took that experience of almost drowning for her to let me teach her how to backfloat in the HOA pool over the rest of the summer.

To those saying the OP vid approach is NEVER justifiable, I agree it's not ideal. In a perfect world every parent would have the time, money and schedule to put their kid in a drown proofing course as shown in @chardog's vids above. The two in our area were a 45 min drive away and required 4 sessions/week with a flat fee of $450 until your kid passed. Talking to other parents, some kids passed the float test in a week, some took 4 months. My daughter almost certainly would have broken that record.

well you are lying, so that is why you "can't begin to respond to that'.

I never said or EVEN suggested that kite raft was attributed to you.

What i DID DO, is engage with a point you were pushing that 'parents should not judge other parents on the choices they make about risk with their children'.

And you DID push a version of that position.

I then offered the kite raft to quickly show you to be wrong on that assertion as almost everybody, given the frequent deaths on those things would agree with me and not you.

Now you are trying to change that argument that judging in some instances (when the activity is deadly) is ok but judging while the activity just causes potential mental trauma is not.

That is NOT you sticking to your prior point that 'judging is wrong' and is now one of 'I will tell you the areas ok to judge and the ones that are not ok judge, in my sole discretion'.

What is clear now is that you actually agree with me and on judging even if we draw different lines. And that is natural. We are under no obligation to agree. So you trying to tell me i am wrong to judge, while you reserve the right to judge is what was inappropriate

 

[SmilinDesperado]

IMO there's a lot of projection in this thread (perhaps also by me) by folks who don't know anything about the context of the OP vid. @ChosenOne posted a pic of some kid being dragged behind a motorboat and attributed it to me lol. I can't even begin to respond to that. Dragging a kid behind a motorboat is pointlessly risking his life so literally the opposite of the OP vid which shows a parent trying to drown proof her kid and potentially save his life.

I also said I did not take the OP approach with my kids because we waited until they were truly comfortable learning how to backfloat, which was around age 6 for both. But that is way too old if you have a pool in your yard. Most folks with pools don't have FU money and no matter how many reasonable (and unreasonable) precautions you take, you can't keep a determined kid away from something 100% of the time.

@ModernMatt described the danger of a kid who doesn't regularly practice swimming/floating having infrequent access to a pool. That's how me and my kids grew up and like him, we had close calls when we failed to panic swim and were lucky to be rescued by an adult. When my 6 yo daughter was at a pool party, my wife literally had to jump into the pool in street clothes to rescue her because she fell off the inflatable raft and nearby kids didn't realize she was actually drowning. My daughter had a false sense of water confidence because she always wore a floatie or lifevest and fought us tooth and nail to keep them on when we took her to a pool. Even when we got her to take off the floatie, she half-assed it and didn't take it seriously. Anytime an adult was in the pool with her (including the swim instructor we took her to every weekend for over a year), she had no fear of water and would laugh and smile while sinking because she just expected the adult to pull her up before she drowned. It took that experience of almost drowning for her to let me teach her how to backfloat in the HOA pool over the rest of the summer.

To those saying the OP vid approach is NEVER justifiable, I agree it's not ideal. In a perfect world every parent would have the time, money and schedule to put their kid in a drown proofing course as shown in @chardog's vids above. The two in our area were a 45 min drive away and required 4 sessions/week with a flat fee until your kid passed. Talking to other parents, some kids passed the float test in a week, some took 4 months. My daughter almost certainly would have broken that record.

Yeah, I think some of our focal points are being a bit misunderstood/missed. I think the general point being made by myself or Chosen One is just that this is a crazy and unnecessary way of teaching a skill, and it has that hint of "what doesn't kill him will make him stronger" style of parenting. (That's why I think posted the kid being dragged behind that boat photo)

So not only is the way to teach this bad, but the motives don't even seem entirely pure when other options exist.
To your point about the time it takes to pass this class, that's understandable. Most people don't have the time to drive 45 mins, 4 times a week to a pool for these kinds of lessons.

BUT, my pushback on that is this is a "can't have your cake and eat it too" situation in my eyes. I see a pool at home in a similar way that I see owning a gun or a pitbull when you have a small child. It's a luxury. And if you aren't able to fool-proof those items against a 2 year old then you shouldn't have them. That's just my opinion, and I'm sure people will disagree on that.

Kids get into things...yes...but that's like pencils and candy...broken glass from a vase, electrical sockets, or something. But there's a lot of careless fuck ups that have to happen for a 2 year old to go outside and get to a pool without you knowing. It's just such a big, obvious danger that it's impossible to ignore.

I also again question the effectiveness of these courses. The kid passes the course, but how many of them actually can stay calm and remember this 2 years later? Especially a kid that isn't in the water much.

 

[GreatSaintGuillotine]

Just teach your kids to swim normally. Wtf

 

[ChosenOne]

... and it has that hint of "what doesn't kill him will make him stronger" style of parenting. (That's why I think posted the kid being dragged behind that boat photo)
...

to be clear, not that i disagree with anything you said but the reason for the kite raft photo was because @ChickenBrother was pushing the idea that we, as parents, should not be judging the choices other parents make with regards to risk.

I wanted to prove quickly that even @ChickenBrother would judge (as is shown above so i proved my point) and that instead what he/she was trying to establish (maybe with out realizing it) was that they would be the arbiter of what other what other parents can and cannot judge based on what they think they are the appropriate criteria.

It is one of the most common errors people make in forum land, which is to think because they believe something and it makes sense to them, then others are WRONG to hold differing views.

I do not care if anyone agrees with my opinions. I will defend them and argue over them but i accept not everyone will agree.

 

[SmilinDesperado]

to be clear, not that i disagree with anything you said but the reason for the kite raft photo was because @ChickenBrother was pushing the idea that we, as parents, should not be judging the choices other parents make with regards to risk.

I wanted to prove quickly that even @ChickenBrother would judge (as is shown above so i proved my point) and that instead what he/she was trying to establish (maybe with out realizing it) was that they would be the arbiter of what other what other parents can and cannot judge based on what they think they are the appropriate criteria.

It is one of the most common errors people make in forum land, which is to think because they believe something and it makes sense to them, then others are WRONG to hold differing views.

I do not care if anyone agrees with my opinions. I will defend them and argue over them but i accept not everyone will agree.

Ah, I missed that part of the exchange.
Oh I definitely agree with you on that. There isn't enough judging going on, imo.
But yeah, as you said, we're all free to have our differing opinions and debate them.

 

[Ezekiel 25:17]

Meh. My uncle straight threw me into the ocean. Waves could have taken me away but that fcker was like....swim or die!!

 

[pugilistico]

Ok.

But i still struggle with the binary you place as it almost suggests that there are only two paths of not teaching the kid, or this way.

Nah I'm just saying I'm not that upset at the mom in the video because there are worse alternatives.

But the more I think about, I think not using such a method is better. This kind of teaching could not only traumatize the kid but the adults in charge would have to be more on their toes and know when to intervene. How do they know when to let the kid figure it out on his own vs the kid actually needs help or he'll die? If this kind of method is more popular, I can foresee a lot of stupid people intervening too late thinking that their kid is just being a pussy.

 

[chill doggie]

I’m not low IQ so no.

 

[ChickenBrother]

well you are lying, so that is why you "can't begin to respond to that'.

I never said or EVEN suggested that kite raft was attributed to you.

What i DID DO, is engage with a point you were pushing that 'parents should not judge other parents on the choices they make about risk with their children'.

And you DID push a version of that position.

I then offered the kite raft to quickly show you to be wrong on that assertion as almost everybody, given the frequent deaths on those things would agree with me and not you.

Now you are trying to change that argument that judging in some instances (when the activity is deadly) is ok but judging while the activity just causes potential mental trauma is not.

That is NOT you sticking to your prior point that 'judging is wrong' and is now one of 'I will tell you the areas ok to judge and the ones that are not ok judge, in my sole discretion'.

What is clear now is that you actually agree with me and on judging even if we draw different lines. And that is natural. We are under no obligation to agree. So you trying to tell me i am wrong to judge, while you reserve the right to judge is what was inappropriate

Yeah, I think some of our focal points are being a bit misunderstood/missed. I think the general point being made by myself or Chosen One is just that this is a crazy and unnecessary way of teaching a skill, and it has that hint of "what doesn't kill him will make him stronger" style of parenting. (That's why I think posted the kid being dragged behind that boat photo)

So not only is the way to teach this bad, but the motives don't even seem entirely pure when other options exist.
To your point about the time it takes to pass this class, that's understandable. Most people don't have the time to drive 45 mins, 4 times a week to a pool for these kinds of lessons.

BUT, my pushback on that is this is a "can't have your cake and eat it too" situation in my eyes. I see a pool at home in a similar way that I see owning a gun or a pitbull when you have a small child. It's a luxury. And if you aren't able to fool-proof those items against a 2 year old then you shouldn't have them. That's just my opinion, and I'm sure people will disagree on that.

Kids get into things...yes...but that's like pencils and candy...broken glass from a vase, electrical sockets, or something. But there's a lot of careless fuck ups that have to happen for a 2 year old to go outside and get to a pool without you knowing. It's just such a big, obvious danger that it's impossible to ignore.

I also again question the effectiveness of these courses. The kid passes the course, but how many of them actually can stay calm and remember this 2 years later? Especially a kid that isn't in the water much.

Looks like multi-quotes are finally back, so I can respond to both of you in the same post. I never said we can't or shouldn't judge. Here's my post on that:

The problem with judging a 2 minute "would you do this to your kid" clip like the OP is that we know nothing about this kid's background, his personality, how much water confidence training he's done or indeed what kind of relationship he has with the woman in the video. Maybe he's had 2 years of pool instruction, has floated many times in another pool, has a great relationship with his mom and is only upset because his favorite youtube channel got cancelled.

I didn't take this approach with my kids but I can see some scenarios where it might have made sense for this kid. There's no right answer for everyone and no parenting is perfect. Barring actual child abuse (which IMO is not evident in the vid), parents have to make their own judgement calls.

So again, my point is not that you can't or shouldn't judge, but that it's impossible to objectively judge WITHOUT knowing all the circumstances BARRING actual child abuse which should be clear. If the woman in the OP vid were angrily yelling at the kid, telling him to "sink or swim MFer!" while flinging him into the pool and then walking away, we can probably agree that's child abuse plain and simple.

But that's not what we see in the vid. And if you're saying the OP vid should never be acceptable under any circumstances, you're presuming to know that kid, his swim training and circumstances, his relationship with his parents, etc. BETTER than his parents without actually knowing anything about him. That's a very high bar to clear and one I'm not prepared to make in this instance because I don't see unequivocal child abuse.

As I've said many times, I don't think the OP vid treatment is ideal and we chose not to take that approach with our kids. But I can see scenarios where it COULD have been justifiable. I've already cited my neighbor's kid drowning in their backyard and my daughter starting to drown and needing to be rescued during a pool party. @SmilinDesperado, having a pool in your yard isn't comparable to buying a gun or a pitbull which you can choose or not choose.

Most people buy "used" homes that aren't purpose built for them. I believe our neighbors down the street moved here from another state on a corporate relocation (like many in our neighborhood), so needed to select and close on a home on a timeline if they wanted their company to cover closing costs on their previous home. Possibly the only available home in the neighborhood they wanted has a backyard pool. Then (like many families in our area), both parents were working full time jobs while their kid was in daycare during the day, and was only in the pool on weekends with her parents during the 6 months of the year when it's pool weather. And like our kids, likely she insisted on always wearing a lifevest or floatie and splashing in the pool without learning to swim or float. You can say "kids shouldn't have unsupervised access to the pool" but any parent knows it's impossible to keep eyes on your kid 24/7. You need to go to the toilet, take a phone call, go inside to heat up dinner, etc. Maybe you take 2 minutes to go do that and when you come back, your kid has climbed over the gate and is floating unconscious in the pool.

 

[BoomStronk]

Looks like multi-quotes are finally back, so I can respond to both of you in the same post. I never said we can't or shouldn't judge. Here's my post on that:





So again, my point is not that you can't or shouldn't judge, but that it's impossible to objectively judge WITHOUT knowing all the circumstances BARRING actual child abuse which should be clear. If the woman in the OP vid were angrily yelling at the kid, telling him to "sink or swim MFer!" while flinging him into the pool and then walking away, we can probably agree that's child abuse plain and simple.

But that's not what we see in the vid. And if you're saying the OP vid should never be acceptable under any circumstances, you're presuming to know that kid, his swim training and circumstances, his relationship with his parents, etc. BETTER than his parents without actually knowing anything about him. That's a very high bar to clear and one I'm not prepared to make in this instance because I don't see unequivocal child abuse.

As I've said many times, I don't think the OP vid treatment is ideal and we chose not to take that approach with our kids. But I can see scenarios where it COULD have been justifiable. I've already cited my neighbor's kid drowning in their backyard and my daughter starting to drown and needing to be rescued during a pool party. @SmilinDesperado, having a pool in your yard isn't comparable to buying a gun or a pitbull which you can choose or not choose.

Most people buy "used" homes that aren't purpose built for them. I believe our neighbors down the street moved here from another state on a corporate relocation (like many in our neighborhood), so needed to select and close on a home on a timeline if they wanted their company to cover closing costs on their previous home. Possibly the only available home in the neighborhood they wanted has a backyard pool. Then (like many families in our area), both parents were working full time jobs while their kid was in daycare during the day, and was only in the pool on weekends with her parents during the 6 months of the year when it's pool weather. And like our kids, likely she insisted on always wearing a lifevest or floatie and splashing in the pool without learning to swim or float. You can say "kids shouldn't have unsupervised access to the pool" but any parent knows it's impossible to keep eyes on your kid 24/7. You need to go to the toilet, take a phone call, go inside to heat up dinner, etc. Maybe you take 2 minutes to go do that and when you come back, your kid has climbed over the gate and is floating unconscious in the pool.

It's pretty silly to hold out some vestige of hope or uncertainty that maybe there is some unnown ractor that makes this okay. We don't have to know anything about the relationship between the child and the woman to better interpret the sounds of him crying, gasping and gurgling. What possible context would undo this? You're out to lunch. The kid was crying at the start, he's probably seen this kind of bullshit abusive strong arm parenting from his mom before.

The only justification for fucking speed-running swimming ability like this is if you somehow know your kid is going to face drowning tomorrow. You can say that the parents are extremely concerned about the risk of the child falling in the pool. That's great. In that case, put a fence up, install locks, spend hours of your time doing swimming and safety lessons. Or, if thats not possible, maybe move to a house that doesn't have a pool. Nothing justifies just traumatizing a child like this because you're too busy or somehow too poor despite owning a pool, to pay for proper swim lessons. They aren't in that much of a rush. There isn't some tsunami coming tomorrow.

 

[Crazy Source]

Meh. My uncle straight threw me into the ocean. Waves could have taken me away but that fcker was like....swim or die!!

Funny, my uncle taught me to swim during a family vacation. He gathered the whole family to watch me swim a lap at the pool outside the house we rented. On the second leg I took a huge gulp of water into my throat/windpipe and had to stop. He waded out, grabbed me by my arms, and shook the fuck out of me while he cursed me in front of everyone. He was a real asshole. Many years later, while he was on his death bed unable to talk, I told him what a piece of shit he was. Played the long game on that one.

 

[Ezekiel 25:17]

Funny, my uncle taught me to swim during a family vacation. He gathered the whole family to watch me swim a lap at the pool outside the house we rented. On the second leg I took a huge gulp of water into my throat/windpipe and had to stop. He waded out, grabbed me by my arms, and shook the fuck out of me while he cursed me in front of everyone. He was a real asshole. Many years later, while he was on his death bed unable to talk, I told him what a piece of shit he was. Played the long game on that one.

Oh damn. Ya, my uncle turned out to be the one everyone had issues with. Hes on his 3rd wife now, drinks a lot well into his 60s. I never had many interactions with him growing up as he moved out of the country, but will always remember him as that mean, bad ass uncle from my youth. Im sure everyone had one. Ah well, he did help teach me a valuable life skill I suppose. Although im sure my actual swimming lessons were more beneficial.

 

[Crazy Source]

Oh damn. Ya, my uncle turned out to be the one everyone had issues with. Hes on his 3rd wife now, drinks a lot well into his 60s. I never had many interactions with him growing up as he moved out of the country, but will always remember him as that mean, bad ass uncle from my youth. Im sure everyone had one. Ah well, he did help teach me a valuable life skill I suppose. Although im sure my actual swimming lessons were more beneficial.

I've softened a bit on my stance and can see the good things, like you have. Gotta let go of that bad shit, brother. CHEERS.

 

[SmilinDesperado]

Looks like multi-quotes are finally back, so I can respond to both of you in the same post. I never said we can't or shouldn't judge. Here's my post on that:







But that's not what we see in the vid. And if you're saying the OP vid should never be acceptable under any circumstances, you're presuming to know that kid, his swim training and circumstances, his relationship with his parents, etc. BETTER than his parents without actually knowing anything about him. That's a very high bar to clear and one I'm not prepared to make in this instance because I don't see unequivocal child abuse.

As I've said many times, I don't think the OP vid treatment is ideal and we chose not to take that approach with our kids. But I can see scenarios where it COULD have been justifiable. I've already cited my neighbor's kid drowning in their backyard and my daughter starting to drown and needing to be rescued during a pool party.

I believe our neighbors down the street moved here from another state on a corporate relocation (like many in our neighborhood), so needed to select and close on a home on a timeline if they wanted their company to cover closing costs on their previous home. Possibly the only available home in the neighborhood they wanted has a backyard pool. Then (like many families in our area), both parents were working full time jobs while their kid was in daycare during the day, and was only in the pool on weekends with her parents during the 6 months of the year when it's pool weather. And like our kids, likely she insisted on always wearing a lifevest or floatie and splashing in the pool without learning to swim or float. You can say "kids shouldn't have unsupervised access to the pool" but any parent knows it's impossible to keep eyes on your kid 24/7. You need to go to the toilet, take a phone call, go inside to heat up dinner, etc. Maybe you take 2 minutes to go do that and when you come back, your kid has climbed over the gate and is floating unconscious in the pool.

Sorry, but this is ridiculous. You don't need to know every dynamic and facet of a child, mother, and their relationship to call a stupid, unnecessary thing stupid and unnecessary. That's a crazy standard, and basically anything could be justified using that logic.

Saying it is "impossible" to judge is leaving the door open for the 1 in 948,834,984,349 chance that this one lesson here is the thing that ends up saving this kid's life in the next few months.
The probability of that being the case is so insignificant that we might as well be having a serious debate about leprechauns and pots of gold.

@SmilinDesperado, having a pool in your yard isn't comparable to buying a gun or a pitbull which you can choose or not choose.

The point I was making about owning a gun or a pitbull while having a small child is that it is your responsibility to make those things untouchable if they're going to co-exist, just like you would with a pool. Your will to lock those things up should be greater than the will of a 2 year old to access them. Your child's safety should come before owning any of those things if you can't make them co-exist safely.
You can't safeguard a kid from everything, but there is an extra responsibility when you have something so obviously dangerous as those 3 things.

Most people buy "used" homes that aren't purpose built for them.

You have a choice on what house you move to. Even if we say you HAD to buy that home, then there are a range of barriers and precautions you can take to make sure the kid never has access to the pool without you there.
There's simply no excuse for a 2 year old getting to a pool. No disrespect meant to a person that has lost their kid that way, but it's beyond careless. Of course you can't watch your kid 24/7, but there are crucial times where you should and can.....like when there's a pool around.

If your 2 year old can climb over a gate, then the gate wasn't high enough. How was the kid able to open the door and get access to the pool?
I wouldn't leave a 2 year old in a bathtub by themselves, let alone a pool. That phone call can wait, as can dinner. If my kid can't swim, he ain't getting in the pool without proper gear.
But again, that's just my opinion on it, and we're allowed to have our own opinions.

I'm not looking at this as child abuse, I just see it as unintentional bad parenting mixed in with laziness. (And none of this is directed AT you--I'm just speaking in general on what I think about this)