Neighbor next door committed suicide

HunterAcosta said:
100. I get what he’s saying but nowadays with all the “ mental health” talk going on people feel like they can help and diagnose everyone . I would get if it was close bud and he’s right it’s nice to be kind to people, but it’s narcissistic to think you’d be capable of preventing this. I have neighbors in my apt who I don’t even know . Don’t know names or anything really . I say “ hi “ in hallway ( I’m in secured building ) but that’s it . Doubt my “ hi” would help em from ending life .
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it would/could. Slight recognitions remind people they live in a community. When people don't greet others in their own environment it displays a sense of apathy and over all the idea that any attempt to step out of their own downward spiral and become more proactive is pointless. People like to feel safe/secure in their own camp. If the people living around them display open disinterest it spirals outward and starts altering how they experience their own reality beyond their own neighborhood/apartment they are basically being conditioned to accept that there is nothing else outside of that and won't try to improve themselves. It's not exactly some life saving miracle gesture that pulls them back from the brink (although it could) but the accumulation of basic greetings displays a sense that someone is at least aware they exist. Imagine in the opposite spectrum it is obvious the neibhour is going out of their way to avoid saying hello to you. Wouldn't their inability to acknowledge you bother you at some point?

This is also the reason why I mentioned social ap stuff. Lonely people will use these and it raises some serious questions on how those apps are operating. If you are struggling socially and can't even get a single response online as well as real life it would seriously invade your head space, and make you less likely to act in the real world. Basically, if it is obvious the person is so socially cut off that they can't interact with anyone online it could also suggest an abusive element, such as a misbehaving mod or a hacker influencing their lives, (jealous ex/family member) otherwise known as an aggressive stalker. Total isolation in todays world isn't possible unless it is voluntary and when someone is so isolated they need to take their own lives or resort to self harm then it is clearly not voluntary.
 
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Sorry to hear this. Suicide is crushing. It took me nearly 2 decades to get over a loved one who committed suicide. It literally haunted me and changed me in ways I didnt understand until I got help. I myself had some dark thoughts periodically but fortunately I had a few good people around. Always key to have solid people in your inner circle who truly give a shit. People need people who care. We cant make it in this world alone or around soul suckers no matter how successful or "well off" we think we are. Many people are very much alone despite how many facebook friends they appear to have.
 
Protectandserve said:
Well I mean I think he did that too on the end…
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Lol.

But to your other point. Working in LE for over a decade now as well. Suicides are just something I've become a bit numb to. When I first started it was a bit of a shock. I'm sure it effects us/me on some level, not sure how though. In some cases I totally get it too. Had an colleague who was diagnosed with ALS. Killed himself when the symptoms got really bad and knew it would take a heavy toll financially on his family to keep him going. I get it.

Death comes for us all, and no one really dies with dignity.
 
First thing if you have to deal with this situation is understand that you are not at fault. They decide to do it and that's that. Don't try to wonder how you missed the signs. They made the decisions and you should say RIP and remember them in the good times.
 
Omegaboy13 said:
Lol.

But to your other point. Working in LE for over a decade now as well. Suicides are just something I've become a bit numb to. When I first started it was a bit of a shock. I'm sure it effects us/me on some level, not sure how though. In some cases I totally get it too. Had an colleague who was diagnosed with ALS. Killed himself when the symptoms got really bad and knew it would take a heavy toll financially on his family to keep him going. I get it.

Death comes for us all, and no one really dies with dignity.
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Brutal and true statement Imo.
I was there when my grandfather passed away. I was the person who while holding a phone talking to 911 administered CPR to a cold dead man till the firefighters showed up.
He died from Mesothelioma.
He, at least died in his own bed in the house he worked hard for.
Bless that man.
Nothing about the situation was dignified and it changed me as a person experiencing that.
 
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It is always sad when someone commits suicide. My sister had a friend in middle school whose dad killed himself two days before his birthday. The dad used a shotgun and did it on the side of their house while the son was at school. The kid got off the bus with my sister when one road over and found his dad on the side of the house. I don't know what happened to the boy as he went to live with his mother but I hope they got him counseling and he was able to live a normal life. I had a buddy whose roommate committed suicide in their garage. My buddy heard the first shot and opened the garage door expecting to see a body but the gut just grazed his skull with the first shot so when my buddy opened the door he watched the guy finish the job with the second. That friend of mine was a drug addict so was his roommate. My buddy cleaned himself up for a few years and got a woman pregnant. He asked the woman to marry him and she said no and that she didn't want the baby. He went in the bedroom and hung himself in the closet. His family convinced her to keep the baby and his sister adopted from her when it was born and they raised it in the family as her child.

It is a sad situation but there is nothing you could have done TS.
 
StonedLemur said:
I can see how that would fuck you up for a bit, that's crazy sir.
Glad he's doing better brother.
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Thank you sir.

He hasn't had any issues (that I know of) since he got out of the hospital and went to therapy for a while. He's currently living in Arizona, going to school and dating a cute redhead who works in Hollywood. So I think he's doing pretty well at the moment lol.
 
DougieJones said:
Thank you sir.

He hasn't had any issues (that I know of) since he got out of the hospital and went to therapy for a while. He's currently living in Arizona right now going to school and dating a cute redhead who works in Hollywood. So I think he's doing pretty well at the moment lol.
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Its always good to hear about someone coming out of the other side of bad situations brother.
Shit like that is unnatural to see as a young man.

I've seen plenty of unnatural shit so I can definitely sympathize.
If hes doing good in school that's a plus sir.

Redhead is the "🍒" on top lol
 
PBAC said:
it would/could. Slight recognitions remind people they live in a community. When people don't greet others in their own environment it displays a sense of apathy and over all the idea that any attempt to step out of their own downward spiral and become more proactive is pointless. People like to feel safe/secure in their own camp. If the people living around them display open disinterest it spirals outward and starts altering how they experience their own reality beyond their own neighborhood/apartment they are basically being conditioned to accept that there is nothing else outside of that and won't try to improve themselves. It's not exactly some life saving miracle gesture that pulls them back from the brink (although it could) but the accumulation of basic greetings displays a sense that someone is at least aware they exist. Imagine in the opposite spectrum it is obvious the neibhour is going out of their way to avoid saying hello to you. Wouldn't their inability to acknowledge you bother you at some point?

This is also the reason why I mentioned social ap stuff. Lonely people will use these and it raises some serious questions on how those apps are operating. If you are struggling socially and can't even get a single response online as well as real life it would seriously invade your head space, and make you less likely to act in the real world. Basically, if it is obvious the person is so socially cut off that they can't interact with anyone online it could also suggest an abusive element, such as a misbehaving mod or a hacker influencing their lives, (jealous ex/family member) otherwise known as an aggressive stalker. Total isolation in todays world isn't possible unless it is voluntary and when someone is so isolated they need to take their own lives or resort to self harm then it is clearly not voluntary.
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What does anything you say , have to do with somebody not killing themselves off something you said bro ?’ I can’t disagree with anything you said . Congrats. Good treatise bro . But again what does that have to do with YOU saving someone from suicide ?!
 
HunterAcosta said:
What does anything you say , have to do with somebody not killing themselves off something you said bro ?’ I can’t disagree with anything you said . Congrats. Good treatise bro . But again what does that have to do with YOU saving someone from suicide ?!
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Sorry I follow this subject matter and its social effects. I started studying sociology partially to research isolation. Think I went off on a tangent.
 
Bobby00 said:
You give yourself too much power a compliment would have not saved her life that is actually arrogant of you to assume. You didnt really know her or what her issues were. So dont beat yourself up over it some people just dont want to go on.
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What do you know. He should genuine say something to her she would feel better.but nobody knows she is gonne sad and all that. Hard to be sane in todays world they created isolated people who just gave up.
 
fica said:
What do you know. He should genuine say something to her she would feel better.but nobody knows she is gonne sad and all that. Hard to be sane in todays world they created isolated people who just gave up.
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What i know

-Your English is not sufficient to talk to people
-I havent seen you be nice or try to make anyone feel better on here yet that is your advice that you dont live you actually come off unhinged and are generally negative.
-Its not hard to be sane you either are or your not.
-You thinking a stranger being nice to someone can prevent a suicide is way beyond naive
-You dont know her problems. Maybe she was in deep debt how is a compliment gonna fix that it wouldnt.
 
I know what you mean, when you feel like you could of done more to help someone out.
 
PBAC said:
Sorry I follow this subject matter and its social effects. I started studying sociology partially to research isolation. Think I went off on a tangent.
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A lot of times, this is where it starts. A sense of community, belonging, people knowing that there's others who care about them. Or at the very least, acknowledge their existence In a positive way.

Problem is, many places In our society have become so disconnected, distrusting. It's common for neighbors to never speak a word to one another. In spite of being separated by nothing more than a thin piece of drywall and plaster.

There's many places In the world today that still foster a sense of family, community, commonly greeting every passerby. But that has been eroded from many places in the world. We're more connected online than we've ever been, but also more disconnected than ever In our immediate communities.

The idea that our own positive, welcoming energy could cascade out Into our surrounding environments definitely makes me think now of ways I may be affecting people just by existing, without knowing it. There's layers to this subject.

I don't think I would've been the one to undo whatever damage and pain which occured In her life.The level of complexity and forces at play which lead someone to take their life are not easy to undo without a comprehensive strategy.

At the same time, It's possible I may have at least known enough to try and exert an influence.

Sometimes its difficult to see beyond ourselves, especially when our own lives are already fairly chaotic In their own way.

At the end of the day It's just a little sad, and your post definitely touched upon a few important things

I do think we generally tend to underestimate the power of our words, presence and just how much they can influence others, especially during difficult moments.

Hindsight is 20/20 i suppose..
 
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This is awful...I know way too many people that commited suicide. I wrote this in another thread, some time ago.
My friends father (we were enighbours, we grew up together) killed himself a couple of years ago. He shot himself in front of the entire family (they celebrated his birthday).

And he was a typical "alfa male" and a very, very fun guy, to have around. What I want to say is you can never know what's going on in someones mind. "Human mind is a very dangerous weapon."
 
I think about it daily for a few months now. No job, negative in my bank account, maxed out credit card. Probably get my car repossessed soon. Pawned my xbox and recording equipment from when I used to do CCapture (2) (2).jpgvoice acting. Got 80 dollars. No family. I haven't had a gf in 3 years. Life sucks asshole balls. Also I've been waiting about a month for unemployment. Just checked the post. Got denied.
 
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Protectandserve said:
I’ve seen more suicides than I can count. It’s always devastating to those around them. Had one dude who killed himself a year to the day after his brother shit himself in the garage
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I can't even count the suicides I've seen in prison and the amount of attempts I've responded to. Sometimes, you have no way of stopping it.
 
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