Mayberry Chat Thread V5: Dogs are the best

I just broke up with my girlfriend. She has a son couple years older than my daughter. Her kid climbed in mines face and she didn't correct him. He does it to dogs too.

My last girlfriend was ideal except she had an untrained pitbull I couldn't let around my daughter and she didn't understand why.

Recently, two other women who are kinda nice have no future because they were hoarders.

When I was in my 20s, I'd date women with hoards, bad kids, and dogs, but as a man in his 40s with a kid it just isn't possible. It sucks. I wish I could find a woman without daughter-targeting baggage.
 
man I wanna know what @Slobodan thinks.

He likes to work out in sweat cargo pants.
also he loves cottage cheese as a work out snack. Mixes it with pineapple

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Also I have switched out me toast to "crisp bread" in the morning,
What a weird name "crisp bread".

But I needed to get away from the toast in the morning.

and @helax told me about crisp bread.
 
Ah the airing of grievances...

Most of those are legit.

Plus it sounds like the gift buying has reached the point where you should just detach and use it as an opportunity to just buy people retarded and wharped gifts that serve only to amuse you lol.
If they aren't gunna make an effort then they've shown the gift buying relating to you means nothing so have at it.

May as well have some lulz.

Plus the shit chicks wear to gyms is retarded these days. They seem to think they are going to march into the public space and display their wares but only the guys they want to see it are the only ones that will.

I'm sure if guys ditched their personal filters and started saying the thoughts in their heads out loud like 'look at the fucking tits on this thing', they might dress a bit differently.
 
I hate it when people tell me I'm hard to buy gifts for. I mean I am old and don't want much and pretty much buy the few small things I do, so they may have a point.

So recognizing that I will often give the few people in my life I have failed to alienate past the point of gift giving closeness, a very short list of very inexpensive items that might amuse me.

Then the fuckers fuck that simple task up. On christmass I got to open up the same gift twice and then be told it was somehow my fault for giving the same list 2 my wife and mom thinking they might coordinate. this year I am going to formally register as if I'm getting married so the store's website will show what has already been bought.

Another instance, I have become dedicated to going to the gym again, but every T shirt and all my sweat pants I have are either black or gray. So i end up looking like this
View attachment 1043155or
View attachment 1043156
So I ask for Champion xl sweats in bright colors AND I SEND THE AMAZON LINK.

Today I am sitting in the black pair of off brand sweats that my mother in law bought me. She was kind enough to buy a 2nd pair, gray. The off brand sweats are great, vastly superior to the ones I asked for because-

A- they have giant cargo pockets on them, I mean nothing says I am ready for an explosive work out than pockets stuff full of electronics and my wallet.

B- Might be made for women as they sit very low on my hips giving the gym access to great ass cleavage shots when I squat, or dead lift or lean over the water fountain for a drink, or breathe air.

C- Make up for being low slung by being very short in the legs, should the gym flood I am going to be laughing at all the regular fitting sweat pants wearers and their soggy ankles.

D- Have drawstrings made out of a kind of glossy fabric that likes to come undone under the mildest strain, so things like blinking and swallowing saliva tend to loosen them with the bonus of even more ass cleavage being shown.

So then I begin to suspect it was intentional, which makes me an asshole right? BUT I MEAN I SENT THE FUCKING LINK.

You my friend are an animal lol.

On another note, you're absolutely right.
How can you mess up getting a man a gift that doesn't really need or want anything... ESPECIALLY WITH A LIST lol
 
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