Divorce thread....

[sweetviolenturg]

Chill, bros. I thought we were all supposed to be commiserating here over our fucked up & failed relationships with women from our pasts? This is supposed to be a bonding experience, man. There's room for disagreements & different philosophies without all the anger. Don't you think?

 

[djacobox372]

You inherit certain traits, both physically and psychologically, from your parents/ancestors. But most of a persons psychological development is from environmental factors, and has little to do with biology.

Some of the factors that influence a child's psychological development include prenatal care and nutrition, childhood nutrition, maternal bonding, and parenting skill and style. Social status, area of upbringing, and wealth/poverty are also huge factors in this equation.

You also seem to be confusing what I said in my original post. I never said anything about whether or not it's better for children to be in a single or two parent family.

If you can find it, watch the documentary: Are all men philes? circa 2013. It gives a great insight into the way human beings are biologically wired.

The single most important factor of biology is reproduction, which means having successful children. So it's a very strong theory that behavior that produces the most successful children would be selected by evolution.

It could be argued that men have two strategies in this: to have as many children as possible and hope to get a random good one, or to closely foster a few children in a stable relationship (or both). Women really only have the later strategy.

 

[Renard]

Is psychological development not biological?

You're literally describing nurture, I don't know why you'd think that's biological.

 

[BearGrounds]

You're literally describing nurture, I don't know why you'd think that's biological.

It affects brain development, which is biological.

 

[MWB1982]

I knew my marriage was over a few months after getting married. I didnt want to get married to begin with. I felt pressured by my ex and her family. On top of that I just lost my family so I had no one really. I hung in there for a total of 8 months or so because my ex was pregnant at the time..

My life took a nosedive financially. I couldn't stand to be around my ex and pretty much lived at work. I worked as much as I could to keep up the Bill's and to stay out of the house..

I had 10 years on her and I felt more like her dad then a husband. She never had a father btw..

After divorce they shut me out of my kid's life and I had to take it to court.

All the sudden they made me out to be this evil abusive guy because I didnt want to be with her anymore..

Went from being the greatest guy that the family loved to being the devil overnight pretty much..

Now I just stay single.. I bang the occasional chick, and I spend every other weekend with my daughter. I pay child support as well.

I love my daughter. I'm free. I do what I want. I don't have to worry about anyone or anything anymore. No stress.

Marriage just was not for me. I thought I was lonely, then got married and found out real quick that I'd rather be alone

I'm happy now for the most part. Wish my daughter lived with me. I think she would rather live with me. She doesn't want to go home when the weekend is over. She is only 4 years old. I spoil her

Marriage was the dumbest thing I ever got myself into but I got a daughter out of the deal so it was worth it

 

[cincymma79]

Yeah see that's what I try to avoid.

Marriage is kind of a shit deal for a man who likes to have fun
Blow jobs go away
Sex rolls back
They get fat
They cost a fortune to maintain
They get terrible ideas from chip and Joanne
So basically like buying a car that only had a functional radio so you can hear how much other people are enjoying their tests drives
The alternative it not having a car at all and dying alone

 

[Fluffernutter]

Here are some articles about human monogamy for you to peruse if you're interested:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/...y/201605/monogamy-is-not-natural-human-beings

https://www.livescience.com/32146-are-humans-meant-to-be-monogamous.html

https://www.bustle.com/articles/121...nogamous-heres-what-5-researchers-have-to-say

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/positive-prescription/201602/the-science-monogamy

https://bigthink.com/philip-perry/scientists-suspect-genetic-underpinnings-to-human-monogamy

http://healthland.time.com/2013/07/30/the-reason-for-monogamy-researchers-disagree/



Some of these points are interesting.

One of the authors stated what I assumed: monogamy helps protect the offspring. However, as the youtube clip shows, as humans began to settle down into one area, we became monogamous to ward off STDs. I hadn't thought of that.

 

[Renard]

It affects brain development, which is biological.

I think the word you're looking for is evolutionary. What you're saying is that both parents investing time in their children gave their offspring (and by extension their DNA) an evolutionary advantage.

 

[Merlotte's]

I didn’t know when it was over. We went from being inseparable to not being able to stand the sound of each others voice in a matter of 5 years. Somehow managed to hold on for a few more years which only caused more hatred. I wish her the worst in life to this day!

 

[Mike]

I got blindsided. Which is why I got hurt so very badly. A smarter or less distracted person would never have married her in the first place. I guess deep down I knew something was off but told myself it wasn't a big deal.

She started acting weird and shady. And ultra bitchy. Got in a huge fight. Admitted she was cheating. It isn't even that she was really mean to me throughout the breakup. It's the fact that once she decided she was done she flipped a switch and didn't give a single fuck about me anymore.

 

[HunterSdVa29]

I realized i was getting nothing outta the marriage, and that i had a dependent (not a spouse)

so i just stopped caring entirely, ghosted her until she asked for a divorce

We've been completely fine ever since, everything is cool w/ Coparenting and everything.

In the actual divorce, i lost about 20ish Gs and got a uh high five in return?

 

[cincymma79]

I realized i was getting nothing outta the marriage, and that i had a dependent (not a spouse)

so i just stopped caring entirely, ghosted her until she asked for a divorce

We've been completely fine ever since, everything is cool w/ Coparenting and everything.

In the actual divorce, i lost about 20ish Gs and got a uh high five in return?

If you have any assets in your marriage you should murder the woman

 

[Mike]

Is psychological development not biological?

He's right that while it's better for raising families, sometimes, monogamy isn't natural for us. Part of why most people suck at it so badly.

 

[TheJewBear]

There were a LOT of problems. I was miserable. She wouldn't touch me.

But the final straw was returning from a weekend trip to find that she had spent almost $200 on food takeout in 48 hours. Just for herself. At a time when we were struggling with finances, supposed to be on a budget, etc.

She then created a secret Amazon account that was linked to my credit card where she covertly ordered random things for herself and her mom. Makeup, clothes, whatever. All surreptitiously while the credit card bill grew and grew. I was like, man having a family is expensive. But I didn't recall the charges, and my Amazon account didn't reflect it. So I called Amazon customer service and they told me there was a second account that I didn't know about. That about did it.

 

[MoparOrNoCar]

Marriage is kind of a shit deal for a man who likes to have fun
Blow jobs go away
Sex rolls back
They get fat
They cost a fortune to maintain
They get terrible ideas from chip and Joanne
So basically like buying a car that only had a functional radio so you can hear how much other people are enjoying their tests drives
The alternative it not having a car at all and dying alone

It's kinda like when you're single for a while you just want a girlfriend and then when you get a girlfriend you just want to be single after a while. There's no perfect middle ground for anyone unless you are the perfect couple like your friends Chip and Joanna and don't have to worry about it.

 

[Phlog]

Biologically speaking, we weren't meant to be in monogamous relationships. We we're meant to spread our seed and procreate. This monogamy shit is a human invention, created by the church.

I mean, that's nonsense, it's more that biologically speaking we are meant to be partially monogamous. If we're talking biology.

And that's what we are, monogamous lite.

 

[TheJewBear]

It's kinda like when you're single for a while you just want a girlfriend and then when you get a girlfriend you just want to be single after a while. There's no perfect middle ground for anyone unless you are the perfect couple like your friends Chip and Joanna and don't have to worry about it.

I really enjoyed having a girlfriend who I loved, who loved me, we had lots of fun together, tons of sex, but I only saw her twice per week and she never slept over (she lived with her immigrant parents and wasn't allowed). I was always excited to pick her up for the day, and also glad to drop her off and head home to my house to be alone.

 

[Phlog]

You inherit certain traits, both physically and psychologically, from your parents/ancestors. But most of a persons psychological development is from environmental factors, and has little to do with biology.

Some of the factors that influence a child's psychological development include prenatal care and nutrition, childhood nutrition, maternal bonding, and parenting skill and style. Social status, area of upbringing, and wealth/poverty are also huge factors in this equation.

You also seem to be confusing what I said in my original post. I never said anything about whether or not it's better for children to be in a single or two parent family.

If you can find it, watch the documentary: Are all men philes? circa 2013. It gives a great insight into the way human beings are biologically wired.

Wut, twin studies prove its over 75% genetic.

 

[cincymma79]

It's kinda like when you're single for a while you just want a girlfriend and then when you get a girlfriend you just want to be single after a while. There's no perfect middle ground for anyone unless you are the perfect couple like your friends Chip and Joanna and don't have to worry about it.

She hates chip you can see it
Fifty bucks she’s fucking one of the helpers while telling chip to help him open it up

 

[minute bull]

I'm not sure I buy that.

I pity the fool who believes that bowlshit. I DO!