Best Simpsons' Line (Thread #2):

[Satur9]

Homer: Moe I have this friend named Joey joe joe Shabadoo
Moe: Homer that's the worst name I've ever heard
( other guy at the bar runs out crying)
Barney: Come back Joey Joe Joe!!

LOL, when I was reading it, I remembered it so vividly.

 

[zackryder]

Homer: Moe I have this friend named Joey joe joe Shabadoo
Moe: Homer that's the worst name I've ever heard
( other guy at the bar runs out crying)
Barney: Come back Joey Joe Joe!!

XD

 

[Satur9]

Cletus: "Hey you know what, I can call my mah from up here. HEY MAH, get off tha dang roof!:


Eddie: Did you hold a grudge against Mr. Burns?

Moe: No!

(The lie detector buzzes, indicating a lie.)

Moe: Okay, maybe I did, but I didn't shoot him!

(The lie detector dings, indicating the truth.)

Eddie: Checks out. Okay, sir, you're free to go.

Moe: Good, 'cause I've got a hot date tonight! (buzz) Odd date. (buzz) Dinner with friends. (buzz) Dinner alone. (buzz) Watching TV alone. (buzz) Alright! I'm just going to sit at home and ogle the ladies in the Victoria's Secret catalog! (buzz) Sears catalog. (ding) Now, would you unhook this already, please?! I don't deserve this kind of shabby treatment! (buzz)

 

[thefaintjoy]

 

[Bobby Boulders]

I'm so hungry, I could eat Arby's.

 

[zackryder]

I'm so hungry, I could eat Arby's.

omg, she really is hungry XD

 

[youandme]

Lisa: Dad, we did something very bad!
Homer: Did you wreck the car?
Bart: No.
Homer: Did you raise the dead?
Lisa: Yes!
Homer: But the car's okay?
Lisa and Bart: Uh-huh.
Homer: All right then.

He was a zombie?

 

[Scrody]

He was a zombie?

Lol post 267

 

[Snubnoze707]

 

[Strychnine]

Mr. Burns - "So, Simpson.. Politics makes strange bedfellows eh?"

Homer - "Mr. Burns, I'm flattered... Maybe even a little curious, but I'm a married man!"

 

[Striderxdj]

Marge:*Homer, there's a man here who thinks he can help you.
Homer:*Batman?
Marge:*No, he's a scientist.
Homer:*Batman's a scientist.
Marge:*It's NOT Batman.

 

[Scrody]

Homer: Hey, you okay, Grimey?
Grimes: I'm better than okay. I'm Homer Simpson.
Homer: [chuckles] You wish.
Grimes: [notices Mr. Burns has walked in] Oh, hi, Mr. Burns. I'm the worst worker in the world! Time to go home to my mansion and eat my lobster! What's this? "Extremely High Voltage." Well, I don't need safety gloves, because I'm Homer Simp-- [zapped to death]

 

[Elysianwing]

Smithers: Uh, sir, we found the problem. Some idiot threw this in the
reactor core.
Homer: [sees charred doughnut] Success!
Burns: You did this? How could you be so irresponsible?
Homer: Eh... it's my first day!
Burns: Since I've never seen you before, maybe it is your first day. Very well, carry on!

[Mr. Burns begins to walk off, when Smithers catches up with him.]

Smithers: Sir, that's Homer Simpson. He's been working here for ten years!
Burns: Ohh, really? Why did you think you could lie to me?
Homer: It's my first day!
Burns: Well, why didn't you say that be...[realizes] Yawoo! You're fired!

That bit always cracked me up, especially when it was used again at the end of the episode, translated to all of the different national guards/penguins. "quack quack quack"

 

[bref]

This whole scene from the sugar episode kills me:


Homer: [sleepy] Must...protect...sugar. Thieves everywhere. The strong must protect the sweet...the sweet...[snores]
Marge: [walking out] Homer?
Homer: [with a Spanish accent] In America, first you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women...[snores]
Marge: Homer...Homer!
Homer: Wha...what?
Marge: I want you to forget about guarding the stupid sugar! You're being completely paranoid.
Homer: Oh, am I? Am I really? Ah ha! [Pulls a man from behind the pile]
Thief: [holds teacup and saucer] Hello.
Homer: All right, pal: where'd you get the sugar for that tea?
Thief: I nicked it when you let your guard down for that split second, and I'd do it again. [sips tea] Goodbye.
Homer: You see, Marge? Do you see?
Marge: Homer, when are you going to give up this crazy sugar scheme?
Homer: Never, Marge! Never. I can't live the button-down life like you. I want it all: the terrifying lows, the dizzying highs, the creamy middles. Sure, I might offend a few of the bluenoses with my cocky stride and musky odors -- oh, I'll never be the darling of the so-called "City Fathers" who cluck their tongues, stroke their beards, and talk about "What's to be done with this Homer Simpson?"
Marge: Look, just get rid of the sugar, OK?
Homer: No! [Marge leaves] [a swarm of bees lands on Homer and the sugar pile] Aah! Hey, get off my sugar. Bad bees! Bad! [gets stung] Ow. Oww! Oh, they're defending themselves somehow.

 

[weed]

no bowl, only stick.

 

[Jar of Flies]

This whole scene from the sugar episode kills me:


Homer: [sleepy] Must...protect...sugar. Thieves everywhere. The strong must protect the sweet...the sweet...[snores]
Marge: [walking out] Homer?
Homer: [with a Spanish accent] In America, first you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women...[snores]
Marge: Homer...Homer!
Homer: Wha...what?
Marge: I want you to forget about guarding the stupid sugar! You're being completely paranoid.
Homer: Oh, am I? Am I really? Ah ha! [Pulls a man from behind the pile]
Thief: [holds teacup and saucer] Hello.
Homer: All right, pal: where'd you get the sugar for that tea?
Thief: I nicked it when you let your guard down for that split second, and I'd do it again. [sips tea] Goodbye.
Homer: You see, Marge? Do you see?
Marge: Homer, when are you going to give up this crazy sugar scheme?
Homer: Never, Marge! Never. I can't live the button-down life like you. I want it all: the terrifying lows, the dizzying highs, the creamy middles. Sure, I might offend a few of the bluenoses with my cocky stride and musky odors -- oh, I'll never be the darling of the so-called "City Fathers" who cluck their tongues, stroke their beards, and talk about "What's to be done with this Homer Simpson?"
Marge: Look, just get rid of the sugar, OK?
Homer: No! [Marge leaves] [a swarm of bees lands on Homer and the sugar pile] Aah! Hey, get off my sugar. Bad bees! Bad! [gets stung] Ow. Oww! Oh, they're defending themselves somehow.

Beekeper: very clever Mr. Simpson. Atrract all our bees to your sugar pile and sell them back to us at an inflated price.

Homer: I took who in the what now?

Beekeeper: Simpson you diabolical... How much for the pile?

 

[Scrody]

In Who shot Mr. Burns.

Wiggum: hey uh....could we get a look at that leg?
Jasper: yup, that's real spruce. You like it?
Smithers: sir, I am so sorry for shooting you in your wooden leg.
Jasper: you shot who in the what now?

 

[kuromusha]

[during a video will from Great-Aunt Gladys]
Great-Aunt Gladys: Now, let's get down to business...
Lionel Hutz: [dubbed in] To my executor, Lionel Hutz, I leave $50,000.
Marge: Mr. Hutz!
Lionel Hutz: You'd be surprised how often that works. You really would.

And of course the timeless-That's a paddlin.", never gets old.

Damm, I really miss Phil Hartman.

 

[zackryder]

"if only this sugar were as sweet as you"

"drinking has ruined my life, I'm 31 years old!"

"You'll never escape the wrath of the mole people!"

 

[Satur9]

Damm, I really miss Phil Hartman.

P4p funniest guy on there to me. He never did disappoint:icon_neut