Almost Died Yesterday

Discussion in 'Mayberry Lounge' started by ToochMcCrotch, May 17, 2014.

  1. ToochMcCrotch

    ToochMcCrotch Yellow Belt

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    I thought I'd share and curious to hear other stories.
    I was under my jeep replacing my shocks yesterday at 10AM, when the jeep rolled and fell on me. I had the vehicle up on jack-stands on level ground, so I'm not sure how it happened. So it rolled and came down on me, I was on my side when it happened. It pressed me flat to my back, but kept my pelvis locked on its side. I remember just screaming HELP, but I knew everyone in my neighborhood was at work. After thirty seconds, I couldn't scream anymore, so I pushed as hard as I could and managed to get my hips out. The wheel hub than hit the ground. I was still stuck, but it was no longer resting on me. Luckily, the garbage men came by within a few minutes and got it off me. Hospital said I had some bruised ribs and some nasty scrapes on my hip, but I'll be alright. When I was walking out, I remembered thinking "God, I want to get hammered and laid tonight." ...and I did.
     
  2. fightingrabbit

    fightingrabbit Banned Banned

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    Halp!
     
    Last edited: May 17, 2014
  3. RedFoxOne

    RedFoxOne Green Belt

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    [​IMG]
     
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  4. Talent

    Talent <img src="http://i.imgur.com/NwpFvrR.gif"> Platinum Member

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    Lol, do you even lift?
     
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  5. Rex Poppa Pump

    Rex Poppa Pump BANG BANG NINERS GANG Platinum Member

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    I would of benched that shit into orbit
     
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  6. Diamond Jim

    Diamond Jim Silver Belt

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    Was this getting laid with a lady friend that you've done it with before or did you just go tell this story to a girl and she put out? Or hooker?
     
  7. Michaelangelo

    Michaelangelo Okay USA Platinum Member

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  8. ToochMcCrotch

    ToochMcCrotch Yellow Belt

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    Girl I had been with before. I had gone to a party, but she actually hit me up out of the blue, so it worked out well.
     
  9. S1Z

    S1Z yoked.

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    Nothing more emasculating than screaming for help out of pure fear. I've been there. Glad to hear you're okay, and congratulations on the post-near-mortum celebrations.
     
  10. TheStruggle

    TheStruggle Yellow Card Double Yellow Card

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    God is going to have to try harder next time
     
  11. Bukowski82

    Bukowski82 Buckle up belt

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    Now this would make an excellent Chevron Commercial:

    This is what happens when you don't sure premium gas... Your Jeep is going to be angry!

    Glad to hear you're ok though, TS... Scary situation.
     
  12. Make-U-Tap

    Make-U-Tap Anti Social People Person

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    So you are saying it was Jeep via Decision?
     
  13. El Chimpo

    El Chimpo Cruel Man Platinum Member

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    Work on your pecs, bro
     
  14. fingercuffs

    fingercuffs and now my bitter hands Platinum Member

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    Can I be the first to say hell yeah?! Well done for being alive, mate. Wow.
     
  15. fingercuffs

    fingercuffs and now my bitter hands Platinum Member

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    Now tell me, you obviously thought you were going to die. What were you thinking? Pam Anderson?
     
  16. Heisenberg

    Heisenberg tread lightly

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    I had my floor jack fail recently. Luckily the jack stands were in place. Scary shit.
     
  17. Heisenberg

    Heisenberg tread lightly

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    Oh hey bro! How you been?
     
  18. fingercuffs

    fingercuffs and now my bitter hands Platinum Member

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    What's that?
     
  19. fingercuffs

    fingercuffs and now my bitter hands Platinum Member

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    Please don't do it again, whatever it is.
     
  20. Squirting Gun

    Squirting Gun Blue Belt

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    I was 18 loosening the torsions on my 92 toyota prerunner with no stands. I was just loosening it a little and thought I would be fine. The driver side torsion stripped out sending my frame down pinning my head to the asphalt. My buddy had to pull my head out. I had just gotten 32in tires earlier that day from having 30in. If I still had the old tires my head would have popped like a virgin cherry. Pretty sure I have permanent head trauma from it.

    2 weeks later I was camping in the desert. I went to leave at 4am to make it home early. I got lost for 3 hours with no gas or cell service. Once I found a road I got to about 75mph when my right front tire rod sheered completely off leaving me rolling down the highway, into a gully, up and hill over a barbed wire fence and landing upside down on a boulder before landing on all fours. I was pinned in my truck underneath my steering wheel, I finally got myself out after 30 minutes and waiting on the side of the road passed out for 2 hours until someone finally saw me and took me to the hospital. Cracked skull and 14 staples later I was released.

    Got a few more but im tired of typing.
     

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