Young man lost in life would like guidance

Lots of great advice already. I recommend you start training Powerslap though.

This way you could be the youngest Powerslap champion and it would be a great way to find women.

Start your training now
 
Lots of great advice already. I recommend you start training Powerslap though.

This way you could be the youngest Powerslap champion and it would be a great way to find women.

Start your training now
large
 
You already have the 6 months training required, so just post more and the size and strength will be added as your post count grows. Will be UFC HW champ this time next year.

As far as women, it will be easy once you're champ!
You'll be able to grab em by the
P :eek: :eek::eek::eek:!!!
<TheDonald>

Edit- Real talk. Trade school is a great option, especially with connections!
 
You have two hobbies that you are passionate about - martial arts and music. You are ahead of most people. I'm probably going to give you advice contrary to others here. I don't think it really matters what you do as long as you find something that you are decent at and it affords a living to you. As long as you have hobbies and things you care about, you aren't going to lose yourself to a job. I'd say the most depressing thing that I see is people in their 30's that work and really have zero interests outside of work. "What do you like to do for fun?" "Oh you know, watch sports. Do some work around the house". I also coach a lot of youth sports and you'd be amazed how many adults can't even help in practices because they are so far out of shape. Many can't get in a squat to catch their kid pitch, run in a basketball game, etc. You can probably even monetize your hobbies, but I wouldn't focus on that.
 
What’s up Sherdog. I’ve been stalking here ever since high school and just said fuck it imma make an account, and maybe be more social here. I’m not your typical sherdogger, I’m not 6’11 with adcc gold and lumpini stadium belts, nor can I bench 150 kg wit my dick, lmao.

Anyway, I’m a 22 year old still trying to find my way in life. I don’t really have direction regarding where I want to go with my life. I still care too much about how people view me and am trying not too trip about it. I know most people will say I’m young and shit, and I understand that. But at the same time, I know I’m not getting any younger and life is going to move quick and I can’t just keep sitting around feeling sorry for myself.

Martial arts and Music are two of my biggest passions and I like to think in an ideal world, I’d be able to possibly be a pro fighter and maybe a dj or producer as a side gig. I have some experience in karate and hs wrestling and currently do Muay Thai and bjj, but I wanna pick up boxing and do some boxing and bjj competitions down the line. As for music I play guitar and am learning to produce rnb/neo soul type instrumentals. But I know that it’s a big risky vision for my future. So I’m looking at going to trade school in May for pipefitting. I was thinking of going back to school instead for firefighting/emt or nursing but my uncle knows a guy who owns a hvac/sheet metal/pipefitting company and is helping put me on and I’m figuring I should just use my connections. But I still don’t know if it’s what I truly want, but I just know I have to do something and not sit on my ass forever.

Also I’m really struggling making friends and getting women. I’m a quiet soft spoken dude by nature and I’m aware I’m quiet and know it isn’t necessarily a bad thing but fuck I hate not knowing how to hold a conversation smoothly in general. Even after reading how to win friends and influence people by dale carnegie I still struggle. It doesn’t help that I’m still a kissless virgin and catch feelings pretty fucking fast.

That was long as fuck sorry I get ranty when I talk about shit like this, I know this place is full of people much older than I am and maybe have been in the same boat as me at some point or maybe still are. I guess I just want to know if anyone has any tips for me going forward? I like to think I have an idea based on what I just said but i have no real concrete plan tbh. I’m just trying to not be a depressed loser anymore.
For the soft spoken part, do voice training. Probably a lot of free online resources for that. I used to do improv as a hobby, starting when I was 18. But, I've that it's helped me my entire life for social situations.

Also, don't try to fix everything at once. Pick 3-5 things each year and focus on that.
 
"I’ve been meaning to do homeless volunteer work. Hell I always said if I ever got like stupidly rich I’d try to combat the homeless crisis in SF"

Consider working for a non-profit. Go volunteer at one and see if you like their mission, if they are legit or just run to enrich the founder, etc. There have to be tons of them targeting homelessness and hunger issues in SF and i'll bet they are desperate for any free volunteer help they can get. Find places your skills help their mission and sooner or latter they are going to offer you full time work.

You won't live a glamorous life of a rapping ufc champion, you won't git rich like these people that do the important work of trading bitcoin and nft's do, but you'll be doing good work that helps people (assuming the non-profit is legit) You'll meet nice people who also want to help others, and you can pursue your martial arts and music as hobbies or try to monetize them on the side if you want.

Dating, make an online profile that pretty much says what you posted in the op minus the career stuff. be honest about being shy and quiet without being self denigrating "don't say I suck" say "I'm trying to improve on......" There are plenty of 22 year old women who would rather date a quite nice guy who has hobbies and wants to help people rather than us adonis alpha sherdog monster studs.

G'luck
 
Yeah, trade school is good too. But go to college if possible.
Doing manual labor sucks by the time you’re 40. And you would think it would keep you in shape. But apparently it doesn’t. I see shitloads of fat construction workers.

I dunno Sherbro, if you're willing to apply yourself, adapt and try new things, climb whatever ladder there is in front of you, you'll make a better situation for yourself out of whatever it is you're doing - trade-related or otherwise. And if you enjoy what you're doing, you almost won't be able to help yourself from advancing. If the idea of electrical networks, or plumbing systems, or building something enduring and functional using your own hands calls to you, then you'll probably have success in that field, moreso than getting into finance or HR or something.

For every 40 year old guy who hasn't advanced much and is still struggling to put up drywall after 25 years of experience, there is a 40 year old guy with a fancy degree slogging it out in their field.

I think staying adaptable and keepign a few different sticks in the fire is a good idea. I'm more than halfway through my masters degree, it took me 10 years to finish a bachelor's degree, during which time I did all kinds of different jobs from cooking to welding to photography. Especially in this new economy and with the advent of AI, I think the idea of going to university to get trained up on how to be some sort of professional in finance, or tech, or HR, is from a bygone era. Today, it's all about adaptability. Who even know what jobs will exist in 15, 20 years time?

It looks very much like skilled trades are going to be the longest lasting. They're also real, you're not moving numbers around on a screen, and a robot is unlikely to steal your job if you know how to weld or build a home.
 
I have questions.
Where are you located? When it comes to competing in MMA (or combat sports in general) you should get yourself to a solid camp. Stay away from a Mc dojo otherwise you’re just going to get hurt.
Also how are your genetics? Natural aptitude for athletics makes a big difference. It isn’t the end all be all by any means but if your continue this path having solid genetic disposition will help tremendously.
Do you have familial support? Combat sports is a tough path and I hope for your sake you have a great family and/or some serious testicular fortitude.
Also, I hope you’re a hard worker. You need to train like it’s your everything otherwise Do Not Compete! If you half ass it you will get hurt badly early and I’ve seen many guys not come back from the public crushing of their pride and bodies. It is an unforgiving sport that isn’t for the ones who don’t put their all into.

You will meet friends, girls and a solid social circle along the way. The gym pretty much raised me and helped make me into the man I am today. I stopped fighting when I realized my ceiling but the tools I learned from it helped me in all facets of my life. I own multiple businesses now and am a part of the upper echelon even within a city that is one of the most financially competitive in the US.
MMA gave me the confidence. Hard life lessons gave me the tools. Opportunities came because I ALWAYS remain an active participant in life on life’s terms.
 
What’s up Sherdog. I’ve been stalking here ever since high school and just said fuck it imma make an account, and maybe be more social here. I’m not your typical sherdogger, I’m not 6’11 with adcc gold and lumpini stadium belts, nor can I bench 150 kg wit my dick, lmao.

Anyway, I’m a 22 year old still trying to find my way in life. I don’t really have direction regarding where I want to go with my life. I still care too much about how people view me and am trying not too trip about it. I know most people will say I’m young and shit, and I understand that. But at the same time, I know I’m not getting any younger and life is going to move quick and I can’t just keep sitting around feeling sorry for myself.

Martial arts and Music are two of my biggest passions and I like to think in an ideal world, I’d be able to possibly be a pro fighter and maybe a dj or producer as a side gig. I have some experience in karate and hs wrestling and currently do Muay Thai and bjj, but I wanna pick up boxing and do some boxing and bjj competitions down the line. As for music I play guitar and am learning to produce rnb/neo soul type instrumentals. But I know that it’s a big risky vision for my future. So I’m looking at going to trade school in May for pipefitting. I was thinking of going back to school instead for firefighting/emt or nursing but my uncle knows a guy who owns a hvac/sheet metal/pipefitting company and is helping put me on and I’m figuring I should just use my connections. But I still don’t know if it’s what I truly want, but I just know I have to do something and not sit on my ass forever.

Also I’m really struggling making friends and getting women. I’m a quiet soft spoken dude by nature and I’m aware I’m quiet and know it isn’t necessarily a bad thing but fuck I hate not knowing how to hold a conversation smoothly in general. Even after reading how to win friends and influence people by dale carnegie I still struggle. It doesn’t help that I’m still a kissless virgin and catch feelings pretty fucking fast.

That was long as fuck sorry I get ranty when I talk about shit like this, I know this place is full of people much older than I am and maybe have been in the same boat as me at some point or maybe still are. I guess I just want to know if anyone has any tips for me going forward? I like to think I have an idea based on what I just said but i have no real concrete plan tbh. I’m just trying to not be a depressed loser anymore.
Work on yourself. Why are you soft spoken? Why does it feel uncomfortable taking up space? Start looking into and reading about attachment theory, love languages, dig in and put the work in now to make your life and relationships a lot more fun and interesting for you and your future partners
 
Life is like a box of chocolates , you never know what you're gonna get.
Except diabetes.
 
For every 40 year old guy who hasn't advanced much and is still struggling to put up drywall after 25 years of experience, there is a 40 year old guy with a fancy degree slogging it out in their field.
This is true.
But the 40 year old with the college degree isn’t doing manual labor, and is making a lot more money over the course of his entire lifetime.
 
This is true.
But the 40 year old with the college degree isn’t doing manual labor, and is making a lot more money over the course of his entire lifetime.

Maybe not. The college degree guy is probably less fun to drink with, though
 
But yeah idk man I’m still trying to not compare myself to others and getting over this girl I was messing with who was kinda promiscuous to say the least. I feel foolish bc of it but I need to find happiness in my own company but fuck this shit is tough when I’ve kinda been a ppl pleaser most of my life and have had my emotions tied to how ppl felt about me.
Regarding girls. The one thing that helped me immensely is when I started thinking of women as "practice girlfriends."

Like this one chick I didn't really like her, but I found out she had a crush on me. In the past I would've just rejected her. But this time I decided to spend some time with her just to practice my game.

I made every awkward mistake in the book with her until at the end she didn't like me anymore. But I didn't care because she was just practice.

if I'd made these mistakes with a girl I really liked, then I'd be heartbroken. I'd obsess over everything I did wrong and feel like a loser.

So just date girls that you don't really like at first. Maybe they're not that attractive. But it's all just practice.

As your confidence grows then you slowly upgrade to girls that are a little better, until you can actually get a great one.
 
But yeah idk man I’m still trying to not compare myself to others and getting over this girl I was messing with who was kinda promiscuous to say the least. I feel foolish bc of it but I need to find happiness in my own company but fuck this shit is tough when I’ve kinda been a ppl pleaser most of my life and have had my emotions tied to how ppl felt about me.

How are you a kissless virgin if you were messing around with a promiscuous girl?
 
Go to college and double major in music and another major thats is applicable. You will make friends and meet girls since most students are women.
 
Also I’m really struggling making friends and getting women. I’m a quiet soft spoken dude by nature and I’m aware I’m quiet and know it isn’t necessarily a bad thing but fuck I hate not knowing how to hold a conversation smoothly in general. Even after reading how to win friends and influence people by dale carnegie I still struggle. It doesn’t help that I’m still a kissless virgin and catch feelings pretty fucking fast.

I read through your entire post and felt this was the most important thing to address. Focus less on trying to get laid and more on making friends in general. Sit down and write a list of conversation topics, things you would say if you visualized yourself in a conversation. Memorize them. Then try to strike up conversations with girls you aren't interested in. Dudes even. Do this a bunch, try to make some connections, and once you feel comfortable try to do the same thing with attractive women. Work is the easiest place to do this. If you don't work in a place with women try volunteering at your local food bank or soup kitchen. Put yourself in an environment where you can casually talk to people.
 
Mb y’all there’s hella mfs I wanna reply to but imma little busy plus I’m not used to forum websites like this. I’ll get back to y’all that got questions tho
 
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