War Room Longue V. 73: Royal Rumble

[Fawlty]

Enjoy your whiskey tide pods

aaaaaand we've found the next fred title:

https://forums.sherdog.com/threads/war-room-lounge-v74-enjoy-your-whiskey-tide-pods.4025589/

 

[luckyshot]

From FB


Trump: Elizabeth Warren has too many giraffes.

Press: Sir, Elizabeth Warren doesn't have any giraffes.

Trump: I'm just saying there's a giraffe problem. There is a big giraffe problem. [cough] Elizabeth Warren.

Press: It seems like you're trying to tarnish a political opponent with a made-up problem.

Trump: No, I am against people having too many giraffes. It's all about giraffes, and this is widespread. There are so many examples of this. You don't think people should have a bunch of giraffes in their house, do you? What kind of person thinks that is ok?

Press: That's not happening.

Trump: So many examples. Why, here's an example, one of so many, but just off the top of my head -- look at Elizabeth Warren, who has too many giraffes.

Press: Sir, Elizabeth Warren has no giraffes.


Trump: That zookeeper is corrupt. I fired that zookeeper. This is the sort of thing I am talking about. So widespread. Such a problem. The zookeeper, Elizabeth Warren. It looks bad. Really bad. It doesn't look good!

Press: What

***

Pence: There are legitimate questions that ought to be asked. Not only the fact that she has too many giraffes but also the fact of the rhinoceroses. The American people really deserve some answers.

Press: But the story is not true. None of it is true.

Pence: Well we just won't know until we investigate this. This is a serious ethical issue and we just can't wave it off with a "this isn't true." That's really unfair to the American people because what if it's true even if it doesn't appear to be?

Press: But there are no grounds for an investigation.

Pence: The president is right. Whatever he said, it was right.

* * *

Jared Kushner, Ivanka Trump, Eric and Don Jr. are out walking their giraffes on Fifth Avenue in New York. They are giant, magnificent giraffes.

Eric [petting giraffe]: Good doggy.

* * *

Giuliani: There is giraffe poop all over Elizabeth Warren's lawn. I read about it in an e-mail and I found the same information on the internet. Here it is in a jpeg with Impact font.

Press: Sir, that is your poop. You pooped on Elizabeth Warren's lawn.

Giuliani: Yes I did. Of course I did. That's my job. I was hired to do that.
***

Trump: Lyin' Liz. Lyin' Liz and the Giraffe Gaffe is what they say, that's what they are saying.

* * *

Next month, 47% of the American public, to the other 53%, over Thanksgiving dinner: How could you vote for a lying giraffe thief like Elizabeth Warren? She belongs in a cage. You are insane.

 

[Jack V Savage]

Long walk, @luckyshot. Plus, the press reaction would be more like, "Sure, Warren probably has too many giraffes (we'll take your word for it), but you have some, too, don't you?"

 

[luckyshot]

Long walk, @luckyshot. Plus, the press reaction would be more like, "Sure, Warren probably has too many giraffes (we'll take your word for it), but you have some, too, don't you?"

What's "Long Walk"? Are you suggesting my next user name?

 

[Jack V Savage]

What's "Long Walk"? Are you suggesting my next user name?

The story looks like a joke or a parable, but it kind of loses momentum before getting to the punchline or moral. Also raises the expectation for the payoff too much. No offense.

 

[Trotsky]

@luckyshot I thought it was good

 

[Limbo Pete]

@luckyshot I thought it was good

Me too

Eat it, Jack!

 

[Ruprecht]

https://forums.sherdog.com/threads/war-room-lounge-v74-enjoy-your-whiskey-tide-pods.4025589/