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Social Update on the sandwich deli girl

LEWIS540 said:
Didn't she already politely turn you down?
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She just said "I'm really young"
Since then she always makes a point to greet me by name, giving me intense smiles and eye contact. So I feel like there's possibly interest on her part.
 
pugilistico said:
Man in some ways I think you're being too much and in one way I get you. I'm also an over thinker and analyze the shit out of everything, which is why my posts are also TLDR. I would also analyze every interaction and smile I get from a girl I like even if I had lots of experience before. The reason I don't do so much anymore is because there's a lot of other things going on in my head and I also have more than one woman who's on my radar. Just don't have the mental bandwidth to think too much about it.

When I mean mysterious, I don't mean being mysterious for the sake of it, although some space between people is healthy. Living a life full of things that interest you makes you automatically interesting. But you say you're living the way that makes your life feel full, then you're good. That's more important than having a woman, because woman are ultimately an accessory to a good life, not the goal.

From my personal experience, whenever I had the feeling a woman likes me, I was usually right. They make it extremely clear that they're interested, or they sometimes outright make a move. It's possible that your deli girl is toying with the idea.

But how much a woman likes you is very contextual. Women are much more fickle than we are. For us a hot girl is hot whether she's playing tennis, cleaning the toilet, or in her pajamas watching TV. A woman might find a man attractive when he looks like the boss on the football field or killing it on a speech, but then get the "ick" when he doesn't know how to replace a tire or something. I had women who were crazy about me but then get lose attraction for me when they see me everyday in my daily life, watching sports in my underwear, taking shits, not knowing how to do stuff, and overall seeing me be a normal human.

I also had several women change their plans and spend a lot of money to fly over to me, buy me dinners, go on adventures together and fuck me crazy before leaving teary eyed. These same women would probably lose attraction for me for one fuck up lol.

Overall I think you have a good attitude about how you want to love someone. It's noble to love someone without expecting so much back. But at the same time, it's a bit too much to want to give so much to someone you don't know. She could turn out to be a shitty person and take advantage of you. Watch out man. I've seen too many guys fall in love to their downfall, including myself.

If you're going to say anything in that letter, I would recommend only saying it under one of the two conditions:
1. When you already have her. It's cute to tell her how much you were into her when you're already together.
2. You're saying your peace and leaving her alone for good.
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I've experienced this myself. Women who act completely head over heels but then witness something from you that turns them off. Or you decide to end the relationship and they freak out and keep calling and texting to see what they need to do to make it work. The indifference drives them wild, to a point. Usually after awhile they eventually give up or change their mind.

It's part of what is so beautiful about single life. I just do my thing and don't worry too much about what anyone thinks which makes me less stressed and let's me enjoy life more, thereby attracting more women. I'm not trying to brag but I have no problem getting women. Getting hot women is harder, but I pull some decent looking ones from time to time. But this young lady is a whole different level.

So, if I get her then I would obviously be good with that but I can accept single life too. Less stress, more freedom, new girls since the best part of any relationship is the beginning when you're getting love bombed. Most relationships fizzle out eventually anyway so better to enjoy the best part of it before moving on.

Even top shelf dudes can't keep a woman.
Jeff Bezos
Tom Brady
Elon Musk
Brad Pitt
Michael Jordan
Scotty Pippen
Kevin Costner
Ben Affleck
Will Smith

None of those guys could keep their women and they all have a lot more going for them than an average guy like me. Those LTR break ups are more painful anyway. So there's freedom in being alone.
 
Strike while the irons hot. She’s gonna lose attraction to you if you wait too long. Maybe find a boyfriend.

If you’re scared to get outright turned down again, just find an excuse to get her number. That way if she denies you it was clear she was never into you in the first place. Just keep it casual and invite her to do something you like. Book stores can be fun. Or whatever it is you like to do

It’s also really weird how you claim to get women but put a 20 year old on a pedestal. She must be way more attractive than anyone else you’ve been with before.
 
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