Throw out the worst excuses you know!


Blue Belt
Oct 5, 2005
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0 I had a crappy night training tonight. Sure, the other people are all "more experienced" than I am in terms of time they've been training. But physically I should have at least been able to hold my own more than I did (or so I thought right before starting class). If I ran into these people on the street, I like to think that just by physical stature and appearances alone I should AT LEAST have an advantage, but we won't go there...blah...blah...blah

So I'm driving home thinking, OK, just gotta keep my chin up, there's always another day, everyone has bad days, etc. etc. etc.

BUT, I know, let's turn this around with a little reverse psychology. I started thinking of all the excuses I could make (I was tired, I really could've done better, Long work week, etc.) and they're all really lame that I wanted to hear them over and over again just to get them out of my vocabulary for good.

So I need your guys' help. What are the worst excuses you've heard or used yourself after a bad training session? You know, the cliches, the ones that we all need to identify and kill so they never have the slightest chance of being used for real in the future, as we drive home sulking with a sore elbow, aching back, and tight neck....

Here is what I heard.

"That was a brute move because you are stronger than me" when I used pure technique against someone roughly my size and weight.

"I was titty smothered" which I really was!

"I'm just having a bad week" which I hate hearing from higher belts...

"I was just lucky" which I told someone I just beat, tho now I believe I actually was better and not lucky.

"Sandbagger." I don't care if he was sandbagging or not!

"He is bigger and stronger."

"He is smaller and quicker."

"I was just experimenting with new moves."

"I didn't want to win anyway."

"I wasn't going 100%."

"Family issues."

"Bad injury."

"Old injury."
actually this is a very good thread.

My favorite is one time that I put a arm triagle choke on this dude (kind of like how Kimo subbed Tank). I did not have the choke in so I was squashing his jaw. He made this sound like he was drowning.Assuming he wanted to surrender verbaly. I immediately let go. Then instead of starting over, he attacks me and does the same thing to me I tap quickly.

His excuse was " Jiu Jitsu is a gentle art and overpowering people has no place on this mat."
There's a kid at my gym who ALWAYS says I'm using no technique. I methodically destroy him whenever I want to, I'll call out the subs before hand and get him in them...still, brute.

Anyway, the other day I told myself that I didn't beat him because I didn't want to make him look bad in front of his kids (he was a purple)...rofl, he owned me for like 20 minutes.
excuses are legit lots of times.... don't go thinking that excuses don't matter at all. We are talking about a hardcore grappling/fighting with submissions involved. If you only got four hours of sleep last night, or you just ate, or you have a cold, etc......well, that is legit. And if it sounds like an excuse for poor performance then so be it. Many times it is a good excuse. Not everybody wants to hear it. But in your mind you can be honest when they are real excuses.
"I didn't know we were fighting"
"you had a baseball bat"
"my legs don't work"

Wah wah wah. All people do is complain.
i did not have sexual relations with THAT woman
sure, there all legit excuses for poor performance. However the last thing I want to hear after subbing someone is that "you dident really sub me beacuse..." mentallity of ppl using excuses.

I dont like the feeling of being superior (ok I like it but not more then anyone else) its just that hey I have problems aswell I have Work/school/frinds/girlfrinds/injuries or maybe i just lost a game of chinesse checkers wich brings me down, but why do this ppl bother telling me about there problems? I dont care ok?

Sometimes you win sometimes you loose, if i loose to someone and feel hey i can beat that guy, just let it go i will get another chanse same goes for Competing, if i loose he simply was better that day, and in those rules, it dosent meen he will be next time (however if the same guy beats me ten times in a row at diffrent times i consider him better then me).
"Damn, shouldn't have eaten right before training"

"Don't use your strength, use technique" - say what? What strength are you talking about?

"You work out, don't ya?!"

"You're higher ranked than me, hence your victory" - huh?

"I'll go easy on you, 'cause you're lower ranked than me" - bwahahaha :)

"I let you win, 'cause you're lower ranked than me, you should practice alot, i'll help you right now" - higher ranked belts that seem to be a bit frightened ... but why?

"Woooow, relax dude, this isn't a comp you know" - I was just very fast in applying an armbar on that guy and he didn't know what to do besides tap ...

"Why are you so aggresive" - Barely touched the guy

"Ooooh, doing that triangle again eh, boring" - can't help it if you keep rollin' in to it

"Oh no, not you, you always hurt me" - I've got bruises all the time (not self inflicted ;-) ), it comes with the practice, accept it

"Gassed!!! Damn cardio I do not have" - yet they go full throttle on lower ranked belts (white, yellow,orange)

"Cramps! I can not continue the remaining training time ..."

"You have been training somewhere else before you got here, right?!"
"I'm just working my weak area"

"Boy, I only slept 4 hours this whole week"

"Your conditioning is just better"

"no, I didn't say tap when you were choking me, I said kcccllllchhchc!!!!!!"

This one is an excuse that I use when I'm pissed from somebody making me tap."My back hurts....from being on top of your momma all night, last night"
bjjvaletudoktb said:
"Cramps! I can not continue the remaining training time ..."

for a while this was my excuse. Then again I was doing Wrestling, Muay Thai, and Jiu Jitsu all in one day, when slapping on a triangle choke, armbar, or trying to break out've someone's half guard my calves would cramp like a bitch. Considering the amount of training time already put in I'd say it was a legit excuse to stop, punch the shit out've it and continue once again.

last excuse I remember giving:

I'm burnt...I hit the weights and wrestled before this...

the response I got: *shrug* "so?" *pause* "you're in"
wtf...i don't know why you guys are taking issue with half the things mentioned in this thread.

i've had to tell people i need to stop rolling b/c i just ate a big meal...not because i don't want to tap, but because i don't want to fucking vomit all over them.

for example, today's excuse:

"dude, i can't train that hard. you're beating the shit out of me and i'm really sore b/c i trained everyday this week. sorry boss, i can't keep up today" is there anything wrong with that?
My most used excuse is: "Man, you're mom wore me out more that I thought last night."

From there things usually don't get any better for me.