Subtle & acceptable sexism towards boys

Discussion in 'Mayberry Lounge' started by MC Paul Barman, Aug 8, 2018.

  1. MC Paul Barman

    MC Paul Barman Gold Belt Platinum Member

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    There's a widespread notion that little girls have it pretty tough.... the deck is stacked against them. Words like 'bossy' or calling them 'pretty' are enough to crumble their childhood desires to be an industry leader in, say, banking.

    I was at the State Fair in Milwaukee today and my 6 year old son was on this trampoline with a bungee harness on him. Next to us was a little performance floor where this lady had a dog performing tricks in front of a small set of bleachers (like 6 rows deep) with a maybe a bit over 100 people watching on. My son wanted to go their next. While he was bouncing in the air I overheard this lady say "who thinks the boy can throw a frisbee better than a girl?!" which was greeted by a mild roar of boos.... and then she followed with "who thinks this girl can throw a frisbee better than him!?" which was greeted by a fairly loud cheer of "YEAH!!!".

    I had no more context than that so I didn't really care. I didn't see how old the boy or girl were... heck, maybe they were part of some bigger show with the dog doing tricks and the boy being a foil to it and the girl being the hero. I didn't know enough and I didn't really care at that moment.

    My son gets done with his bouncing and we head over to the dog trick floor. The two kids had finished throwing the frisbee to the dog and the lady who was hosting it said "let's hear who wants to cheer for the boy".... a low murmur of boos and some laughing. Then, "who thinks the girl did better??!" and a loud roar of approval.

    I look to see and it's just some random boy and girl. The boy was no more than 4 years.... the girl looked to be maybe 6 at best. He was standing there with his head bowed looking embarrassed.

    It still hadn't really sunken in yet.

    The performance floor had a small picket white fence around it (maybe 3 feet high) and children were allowed to go up to the fence, while parents and adults had to sit on the bleachers.
    The lady starts the show over having the dog jump through some little hoops.... but then she brings out 2 frisbees and says "is there a little boy and a little girl who would like to throw a frisbee for (whatever the dog's name was)". So again she has a 4-5 year old boy and a girl (5-6 years of age) and now it's dawning on me that this is just part of the skit she does.

    She starts the same way "who thinks a boy can throw a frisbee better than a girl?".... not a fucking peep so I yell out "YEAH!" and she replies "wow... uhhhh…. that's a first. Well you at least got one" (she says this to the little boy). Then with the girl and a loud cheer for her.

    Goes through the whole routine of having them throwing a frisbee to the dog to see which frisbee the dog can catch (boy or girl)….. the dog doesn't catch it any time it's thrown. The lady makes a few joking comment about how it's purposely dropping the girl's throws because it's a boy dog. Then she does the whole "let's cheer on who did better"..... the little boy looks kind of stunned at having to face the audience. Then he gets booed, he drops his head, runs to the fence to have his mom pick him up over it. Then the girl gets cheered on.

    This isn't new. When I saw this playing out I know that I've seen scenarios like this before and have rarely gave it a moments thought. Initially I was just glad it wasn't my son who got called out there to get booed by a crowd because I know it would have bothered him quite a bit. But this was so commonplace that no one in the stands (aside from me) thought there was anything amiss with this. While we're told how detrimental it is to a little girl's mental wellbeing to say "bossy" or call them "pretty" and a whole litany of words that phrases that are verboten.
     
  2. HTTR21

    HTTR21 Changing roosters into hens. Platinum Member

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    I had a fat black try to put moves on me during her job interview. She got really handsy and said she was a leo, the "lioness." Then asked me what my sign was. I was a 160lb 21 year old white manlet lol.

    Anyways I told everyone and they just laughed. If the shoe was on the other foot my ass wouldn't have gotten the job.

    Lol, she had confidence. I still laugh about it.
     
  3. Dark One

    Dark One Purple Belt

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    You sound very bossy
     
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  4. MC Paul Barman

    MC Paul Barman Gold Belt Platinum Member

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    I don't feel it
     
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  5. VulcanNervPinch

    VulcanNervPinch Silver Belt

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    That's astoundingly shitty.
     
  6. dildos

    dildos Gold Belt

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    shouldda told that little girl she throws like a girl.

    that would have shown her.
     
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  7. MC Paul Barman

    MC Paul Barman Gold Belt Platinum Member

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    I think for me the biggest thing was just how nonchalant they were all about it... and then how stunned she seemed when I gave the boy a cheer. She actually seemed a bit dumbfounded at first as to why anyone would even do that.
     
  8. Cool Hand Luke

    Cool Hand Luke Mr. Cool Hand Luke Ice

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    this
     
  9. 5crew

    5crew Black Belt

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    I tried to read OP. Second paragraph in, I scrolled down and saw another 42572 paragraphs.. It's 10am here, I'm still a little stone from Wednesday night drinking. I'm sorry fellow Mayberrian.

    So..

    [​IMG]
     
  10. Pugilistic

    Pugilistic Silver Belt

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    It goes both ways. Sexism towards women exist because society's expectations towards men and vice versa. It's such a shame people can't just accept people as people.
     
  11. Tycho Brah

    Tycho Brah You drink water, I drink anarchy Platinum Member

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    At least we can be comforted by the fact that basically over the rest of his lifetime he'll be dominating 90% of girls in 90% of physical activities he chooses to pursue.

    Though I don't expect this kind of treatment is going to make him a good sport about it.

    [​IMG]

    "What frisbee, what!!!"
     
    Last edited: Aug 8, 2018
  12. AJ Garcia

    AJ Garcia Level 10 Keyboard warrior Professional Fighter

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    After cheering for the boy followed by her acting shocked you should’ve yelled out “well what do you expect? They’re throwing frisbees, not washing dishes” and then dropped the mic.
     
  13. Cash Bill 52

    Cash Bill 52 Brown Belt

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    A lot of stuff to unpack there...

    First, props to you for being aware of the subtle and acceptable sexism. Giving a shout out to the boy in your situation seemed warranted.

    A couple of questions...

    1. Did having your son next to you have you “rooting for the home team?” If it was your daughter, how would it affect your actions?

    2. Isn’t this just more sexism against girls? Making the boy the bad guy to root agaisnt because the girl needed the extra help? Why is the girl necessarily the underdog? Especially At that age! Many girls are more athletic than boys at 5-6 years old.

    3. How relevant is your geographical location? This would never fly in the San Francisco Bay Area. Does it bother you that nobody else was rooting for the boy? wTH ... shaming people for picking the boy...?

    Anyway, thanks for sharing. I’m a kindergarten teacher and I am interested in stories like this.
     
  14. That's pretty disgusting. This kind of stuff contributes to soy boys who enjoy dominant woman. This kind of demeaning behavior towards our sons and young men should be stomped out immediately. We need to build their confidence, not smash it in the name of building a woman's confidence.
     
  15. squeezewax

    squeezewax Brown Belt

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    Females live in a different world to males and i'm glad i didn't grow up and live in theirs.
     
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  16. Tuf_guy

    Tuf_guy Gold Belt

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    Listen, "bro", that empowered person (not sure why gender needed to be identified for the story) was just trying to help that wonderful child to know her worth.

    <BirdieOwn>



    I'm sorry, but now it really does seem borderline unfair to bring someone into this world unless you're ready to be on top of your shit, but things are still shitty anyway. Seems like everybody's an asshole. Even some of the people who have roots in standing up to the assholes are often now just being assholes independently of their counterparts.

    Sorry, I got nothing. I'd like to have some silver lining remark, but I'm too pessimistic, perhaps.

    But basically, I think people are so self-absorbed, they only want to see their perspective, and are blind to their own bullshit - so they don't see when they're doing wrong.
     
    Last edited: Aug 8, 2018
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  17. Alphaboy

    Alphaboy Black Belt

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    This novel of a post is waaaaaay too long for me to read. I didn't even read class assignments that were that long.

    But based on the little I read, agree with the jist of what you wrote though, boys are treated like shit compared to women. In a weird, indirect way though, it fucks women over in the long run.
     
  18. A.A. Riggs

    A.A. Riggs human development what?!

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    Not bad, as far as fuccin filibusters go.
     
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  19. LEGS MAHONEY

    LEGS MAHONEY genetically modified man shark

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    This woman has probably been divorced three times and hates men so much at this point she has no problem taking it out on little boys even.

    Next time pull a switch blade on her and threaten to cut her good
     

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