STAR WARS: THE LAST JEDI

[BisexualMMA]

LOL I kept thinking the same shit during the movie too.. like "Did Rian Johnson negotiate for a cut of the merchandise sales?"

the jedi temple caretakers, porgs, the entire Not-Hoth sequence, it all just felt like setup for toys/merchandise that he could reap the benefits of,

this movie was a movie made for trailers, not for a coherent plot. Like seriously

I'm still waiting for an explanation as to what the Rebel Alliance plan was with the salt spewing old ass B-wing fighters? was it literally a suicide mission? they didnt have weapons on board? so why is Rose shocked that Finn is going to sacrifice himself if literally the only purpose of their mission appears to be to kill themselves trying to blow up the battering ram?

oh right...its for the cool trailer visuals

I wonder if they'll actually make a toy for kids where you milk its testicles like Luke did. If no toy comes out for that one, it's pretty much proof positive that Johnson was just using that scene to humiliate Skywalker and laugh at the audience.

Yeah, the plot was just something that worked well enough for Johnson to turn his sleight of hand insults of Star Wars fans into a movie.

 

[vcmmafan]

 

[iThrillhouse]

I wonder if they'll actually make a toy for kids where you milk its testicles like Luke did. If no toy comes out for that one, it's pretty much proof positive that Johnson was just using that scene to humiliate Skywalker and laugh at the audience.

Yeah, the plot was just something that worked well enough for Johnson to turn his sleight of hand insults of Star Wars fans into a movie.

I feel like Disney also had something to say about that too

"they dont like the blue milk in Rogue One! WELL FUCK YOU HERES YOUR PRECIOUS LUKE SKYWALKER MILKING THE FUCKING COW YOU GOD DAMN BABIES!"

like it felt like such a bizarre middle finger to critics of the Disney-Star Wars venture

 

[BisexualMMA]

I feel like Disney also had something to say about that too

"they dont like the blue milk in Rogue One! WELL FUCK YOU HERES YOUR PRECIOUS LUKE SKYWALKER MILKING THE FUCKING COW YOU GOD DAMN BABIES!"

like it felt like such a bizarre middle finger to critics of the Disney-Star Wars venture

Like I said earlier, I've never seen a film before which, as a whole, was so mean spirited toward its own audience.

 

[ufcfan4]

LOL I kept thinking the same shit during the movie too.. like "Did Rian Johnson negotiate for a cut of the merchandise sales?"

the jedi temple caretakers, porgs, the entire Not-Hoth sequence, it all just felt like setup for toys/merchandise that he could reap the benefits of,

this movie was a movie made for trailers, not for a coherent plot. Like seriously

I'm still waiting for an explanation as to what the Rebel Alliance plan was with the salt spewing old ass B-wing fighters? was it literally a suicide mission? they didnt have weapons on board? so why is Rose shocked that Finn is going to sacrifice himself if literally the only purpose of their mission appears to be to kill themselves trying to blow up the battering ram?

oh right...its for the cool trailer visuals

Re-watching the Not-Hoth (props btw, that's funny shit) scene again, it was clear to me that with 13 of those slow, shitty vessels and a bunch of tie fighters and AT-ATs protecting the canon, there was no way in my opinion that any of them could survive to get close enough to that thing to do the Russell Case special. It does stretch credibility that in typical movie fashion everybody is getting picked off left and right but Finn, Poe, and Rose do not. I know Poe is a phenomenal pilot but Finn is not and Rose is an engineer, no?

 

[TheRuthlessOne]

I wonder if they'll actually make a toy for kids where you milk its testicles like Luke did. If no toy comes out for that one, it's pretty much proof positive that Johnson was just using that scene to humiliate Skywalker and laugh at the audience.

Yeah, the plot was just something that worked well enough for Johnson to turn his sleight of hand insults of Star Wars fans into a movie.

I'd buy that toy

 

[BisexualMMA]

I'd buy that toy

 

[Tiny]

LOL I kept thinking the same shit during the movie too.. like "Did Rian Johnson negotiate for a cut of the merchandise sales?"

the jedi temple caretakers, porgs, the entire Not-Hoth sequence, it all just felt like setup for toys/merchandise that he could reap the benefits of,

this movie was a movie made for trailers, not for a coherent plot. Like seriously

I'm still waiting for an explanation as to what the Rebel Alliance plan was with the salt spewing old ass B-wing fighters? was it literally a suicide mission? they didnt have weapons on board? so why is Rose shocked that Finn is going to sacrifice himself if literally the only purpose of their mission appears to be to kill themselves trying to blow up the battering ram?

oh right...its for the cool trailer visuals

And toys...

 

[Goonerview]

Certain scenes:

- Luke throwing away the light saber

- Ren smashing his mask

- Snoke dying

- Rey's parents were bums

This was Rian Johnson giving JJ Abrams a middle finger

 

[shockaholic12]

I would expect this since the TFA was the first Star Wars in many years and the return of Luke/a fresh new franchise. No way the sequel comes in with the same hype.

TFA was a much, much better movie.

Nah, TFA was a straight New Hope ripoff with slight changes to the script. Way to derivative.

TLJ at least had the balls to be an original flick, although not as well paced, which puts it at about level with TFA.

 

[TheRuthlessOne]

I would expect this since the TFA was the first Star Wars in many years and the return of Luke/a fresh new franchise. No way the sequel comes in with the same hype.


Nah, TFA was a straight New Hope ripoff with slight changes to the script. Way to derivative.

TLJ at least had the balls to be an original flick, although not as well paced, which puts it at about level with TFA.

Thats true

Even Empire had a steep fall off compared to New Hope

New Hope - 460 mil domestic
Empire - 290 mil domestic
Return - 309 mil domestic

 

[iThrillhouse]

Re-watching the Not-Hoth (props btw, that's funny shit) scene again, it was clear to me that with 13 of those slow, shitty vessels and a bunch of tie fighters and AT-ATs protecting the canon, there was no way in my opinion that any of them could survive to get close enough to that thing to do the Russell Case special. It does stretch credibility that in typical movie fashion everybody is getting picked off left and right but Finn, Poe, and Rose do not. I know Poe is a phenomenal pilot but Finn is not and Rose is an engineer, no?

yeah I didnt even bother putting that point in my dissection because im sure some nerds would be like

"well actually, POE IS STRUGGLING TO PILOT THE SHIP AND NEEDS ROSE TO HELP HIM BUY TELLING HIM TO PULL THE CX-470S GREEN BUTTON to stablize the ship!"

but yeah that entire sequence is just borderline retarded...like Finns entire character is about being a coward and using others to get where he needs to be...but with zero experience or happening to his character since the end of TFA...he suddenly can pilot an outdated resistance ship...as a former janitory coming off spinal rehab...

i can make leaps in logic here and there...but man this movie challenged me every turn...it was just soooo stupid

 

[iThrillhouse]

also did anyone think of that scene from Robot Chicken where the Emperor is giving Vader shit about how much a Death Star cost?


did anyone think of that as that super omega destroyer blew up in the first few minutes and then Snoke comes on screen and starts to berate Hux

I 10000% thought he was about to be like "you realize how much that cost?"

 

[Bonos]

Please note that The Last Jedi contains a sequence where R2D2 plays a hologram of Leia from the first film for Luke. Luke replies, "that's a cheap trick." Please note that Rian Johnson is telling you that The Force Awakens was a cheap trick and that you're a dumb shithead if you enjoy seeing the return of any old characters or feel any sort of nostalgia. This is intentionally done by the director for a creative effect.

Was TFA ever announced as a remake before it was released?...that's a cheap trick.

The swerves made the story/themes more interesting. The alternative was derivative.

Batshit Luke was a huge plus. We didn't need him to be another version of the Guinness Obi, and I loved that line where he calls out the Jedi order for being incompetent in the prequels. Johnson had to work within the canon and bless his heart he has a sense of humor.

 

[ufcfan4]

also did anyone think of that scene from Robot Chicken where the Emperor is giving Vader shit about how much a Death Star cost?


did anyone think of that as that super omega destroyer blew up in the first few minutes and then Snoke comes on screen and starts to berate Hux

I 10000% thought he was about to be like "you realize how much that cost?"

lol great point.

 

[ufcfan4]

Was TFA ever announced as a remake before it was released?...that's a cheap trick.

The swerves made the story/themes more interesting. The alternative was derivative.

Batshit Luke was a huge plus. We didn't need him to be another version of the Guinness Obi, and I loved that line where he calls out the Jedi order for being incompetent in the prequels. Johnson had to work within the canon and bless his heart he has a sense of humor.

While I could appreciate Luke shitting on the Jedi for not seeing Sidious coming, I felt it was a bum rap when he called out Ol' Obi Wan.

A Jedi was responsible for training and creating Darth Vader. Talk about throwing under the bus.

Gtfo. That's your best friend who changed your bum life by getting you off Tattooine. How quickly people forget.

 

[Bonos]

and the guy who put a Star Trek sequence into a Star Wars film

Which part? I forgot most of TFA.

Speaking of which, TLJ will be the only SW disney entry that I re-watch in the theater. It reminds me of when I bought advanced IMAX tickets for TFA, but could only get them on the second day, so I caved and also went on opening night...I never bothered to go back the next day to see it in IMAX lol

 

[Bonos]

While I could appreciate Luke shitting on the Jedi for not seeing Sidious coming, I felt it was a bum rap when he called out Ol' Obi Wan.

A Jedi was responsible for training and creating Darth Vader. Talk about throwing under the bus.

Gtfo. That's your best friend who changed your bum life by getting you off Tattooine. How quickly people forget.

Old Ben couldn't foresee or prevent his foster parents being roasted. He probably knew but didn't care since he hated Owen Lars...still, Beru deserved better!

 

[sickc0d3r]

Maybe Ben shouldn't have hid Anakin's son on Anakin's home planet with people who have Anakin's surname in the first place. Luke had 40 years of solitude to mull over the incompetence of his jedi brethren.

 

[KILL KILL]

I wonder how pissed Abrams was when he saw this movie. As not awesome as The Force Awakens was, it left room for sooo much potential and Rian Johnson took a huge steaming dump on a platter and served it to Abrams for a third movie. What the fuck is he going to do with this series now? It's not even remotely interesting.