Mayberry Chat Thread V5: Dogs are the best

[helax]

I banged a chick named Melissa back in the day who was a total freak.
She had a boyfriend Wade who traveled for work.
While he was away, she convinced me to sneak in the window of their apt and bang her in bed while
she was naked and 'asleep'.
It was pretty intense tbh, 'omg, what are you doing? I don't even know you' with fake resistance.

That’s how you get covid

 

[Yoricks Wisdom]

That’s how you get covid

OR....STD's from Mars.
she moved north to go to Chico State and I went there to visit her one time.
it was one of those shitty apartment buildings with the outdoor hallways and was filled with college kids.
when she answered the door, there were six (count em, SIX) dudes in there salivating with hyena grins.
I fucked her again but she wasn't very enthusiastic. maybe I was number 7, who knows.

then a few years later, my buddy Paul said he saw her somewhere and she had gained 40 lbs and had three little kids with her.
thankfully, he said none of them looked remotely like me.

 

[Caesar_Of_Uranus]

Just when you think our Secret Service is incompetent... Hold my cerveza.

 

[aerius]

Needs more Acme

 

[Versez]

Getting drunk tonight, Yeeehawwww

 

[Kardashians]

Getting drunk tonight, Yeeehawwww

If you’re drinking white claws I’m jealous.

 

[Versez]

If you’re drinking white claws I’m jealous.

i'll let you that chance, haven't drink white claws since the last summer of the pandemic.

 

[Kardashians]

i'll let you that chance, haven't drink white claws since the last summer of the pandemic.

Oh, well this just makes it worse. You COULD be drinking white claws, but you choose not to? Pshh. Whatever.

 

[Kardashians]

Because @Versez sucks!!!! I had to get my own white claws tonight and indulge.

Canada has been suffering, here in my little town we’ve been out of white claws for what feels like ten years, to your casual alcoholic. But today! Today they were back in stock! Rejoice, my local drunkards.

 

[Versez]

Because @Versez sucks!!!! I had to get my own white claws tonight and indulge.

Canada has been suffering, here in my little town we’ve been out of white claws for what feels like ten years, to your casual alcoholic. But today! Today they were back in stock! Rejoice, my local drunkards.

I never understood the hype surrounding that drink. Mid at best. But still better than cheap beers …

 

[Kardashians]

I never understood the hype surrounding that drink. Mid at best. But still better than cheap beers …

Oh it’s not a good drink. But I like it bc it’s a light seltzer that doesn’t go heavy on artificial sweeteners to make up for anything, like a lot of them do. It’s just bland, and I like that.

I’ve never had beer. But on Halloween I drank non alcoholic beer and liked it well enough. Maybe one day I’ll get brave and try the real thing.

 

[Versez]

Oh it’s not a good drink. But I like it bc it’s a light seltzer that doesn’t go heavy on artificial sweeteners to make up for anything, like a lot of them do. It’s just bland, and I like that.

I’ve never had beer. But on Halloween I drank non alcoholic beer and liked it well enough. Maybe one day I’ll get brave and try the real thing.

I’ll maybe give it a try sometime ! Beers are starting to give me not so good effects. This

one looks quite attractive :

 

[Kardashians]

I’ll maybe give it a try sometime ! Beers are starting to give me not so good effects. This

one looks quite attractive :

Yo is that a BIGGER can of white claw? Bitchhhhhhh

I haven’t tried a cocktail that I’ve liked tbh lol. But hey, if it’s up your alley, enjoy one x

 

[Meatspin]

Oh it’s not a good drink. But I like it bc it’s a light seltzer that doesn’t go heavy on artificial sweeteners to make up for anything, like a lot of them do. It’s just bland, and I like that.

I’ve never had beer. But on Halloween I drank non alcoholic beer and liked it well enough. Maybe one day I’ll get brave and try the real thing.

Why do this when wine exists?

 

[Kardashians]

Why do this when wine exists?

I’m not big on wine. I’ll drink it if there’s nothing else tho. Lol.

 

[Meatspin]

I’m not big on wine. I’ll drink it if there’s nothing else tho. Lol.

That's a shame. More for me though.

 

[Sage NorthGOAT]

How many tortillas did you guys find under your pillow today? 9 here

 

[Yoricks Wisdom]

Just started drinking some really good Chianti Classico.

Takes me back to Jersey with my Italian family gatherings.

 

[Ardaric]

Just started drinking some really good Chianti Classico.

With liver and fava beans?

 

[Yoricks Wisdom]

Not yet.