Married with newborn on the way.

[DespicablePeep]

Don't feel you have to stay with her because of the baby. You can still be a good father and not be with someone you have problems with.

I feel a baby will have an easier time with two happy, but apart parent rather than two parents who stay together but have a constant state of tension and frustration in the household. Kids pick up on that.

Agree, the problem is she is great to me, I just don

 

[Cool Hand Luke]

There is more to this.

 

[blokeybloke]

I try to model my life after the doc.

Dr. Phil would not approve of your gambling addiction.

He'd Yenta you into spending all of that fun headscratching time into something more mutually productive and exponentially boring such as woodworking & crafting some rose petals and have you lay them down from the front door all the way to the bed, where an array of Oprah Lifestyle magazines await her perusal. To be done on every day that her painters are in Town.

 

[Cake4Breakfast]

Maybe try some private counseling before the marriage counseling. Make sure you know yourself and what you are feeling really well before doing anything major. The grass may not be greener on the other side, as wherever you go, there you are.

 

[WalkenWouldOwn]

I hate talking about myself, unless I

 

[Cake4Breakfast]

I really don't understand why so many turn to counseling.

If you aren't happy in the relationship does it really make sense to pay someone an exorbitant amount of money to essentially attempt to talk you back into loving that person?

Because most people don't understand themselves and why they do things. They get divorced thinking it was all the other person, without knowing what they brought to the party, or why they picked someone to build a life with who always had characteristics that they ended up hating. Then they get married again, and divorced again.

 

[BigRed78]

Ts the sex thing can be a big issue for some reason tons of women go of sex when they get married (my mrs included). To put it nicely how often do you do it?

 

[DespicablePeep]

Just to be picky, she can

 

[Oblivian]

Dr. Phil would not approve of your gambling addiction.

He'd Yenta you into spending all of that fun headscratching time into something more mutually productive and exponentially boring such as woodworking & crafting some rose petals and have you lay them down from the front door all the way to the bed, where an array of Oprah Lifestyle magazines await her perusal. To be done on every day that her painters are in Town.

This seemed appropriate:

 

[HunterIII]

If its been awhile, have sex with her, then see how you feel.

This could all be built up sexual repression that could all blow over in an instant.

 

[DespicablePeep]

Ts the sex thing can be a big issue for some reason tons of women go of sex when they get married (my mrs included). To put it nicely how often do you do it?

During the first 5 years, like 4 days a week, from there 2 days a week and married 1 a week or every 15 days. But I also got bored with the sex, somethings in her she never tried to improve, awful to say this, but her oral sex was C- and she hardly made an effort to improve, she had some gag reflexes (I always wash it properly before anyone jokes)

I

 

[DespicablePeep]

There is more to this.

there is always something more, but go on what do you see

 

[oldshadow]

I really hate to break it to you but this is kind of what marriage is especially when you are young, you have this

 

[BigRed78]

During the first 5 years, like 4 days a week, from there 2 days a week and married 1 a week or every 15 days. But I also got bored with the sex, somethings in her she never tried to improve, awful to say this, but her oral sex was C- and she hardly made an effort to improve, she had some gag reflexes (I always wash it properly before anyone jokes)

I

 

[Grob]

7 year itch.

What attracted you to her initially? What did/do you have in common? Maybe you need to "date" your wife again?

It's very easy to nitpick the little things, especially when that person is around you most of the time and it ends up feeling like they're more of an annoying roommate that doesn't pick up after themselves.

I don't envy your position now. You should have acted right when you found out she was pregnant. Her hormones are all out of whack now and will be for sometime. A lot of the shit she'll do will be emotional reaction and not at all logical.

You really need to talk to her about your future together. Tell her to quit wasting money on trivial crap (unless she already has your retirement funds and kid's education funds set aside and all debts paid off). in which case, shut your yap and enjoy the free ride.

 

[GoatGoat]

I really don't understand why so many turn to counseling.

If you aren't happy in the relationship does it really make sense to pay someone an exorbitant amount of money to essentially attempt to talk you back into loving that person?

Because it can work in the right situation. It's not going to solve major problems though, it's not going to change who someone fundamentally is. If a husband wakes up one morning and finally realizes his wife is a b*tch and he hates her, counseling isn't going to work miracles. I've been with my wife 10 years and we are currently in counseling. We still love each other, but could use some help. I know it's made me a lot happier to have someone help us work through our issues.

Also, I get a bunch of free sessions through my work EAP and then a reduced cost after that. My wife has EAP coverage through work so we basically get 15 sessions free then pay $50/session after that. Even at $50, it's not really that much, although that's relative of course.

 

[MuyThaiTom]

The first 3 months of infancy is tough. Bear your way through it. From 6 mo - 1 year your baby will start to develop a personality. You will love him/her. Wait till then to decide if you want to be with that kid every day or if you want to be apart most the time, pay child support and alimony and have another guy as partial to full father figure.

In the mean time try to work on the relationship however possible.

 

[DespicablePeep]

I really hate to break it to you but this is kind of what marriage is especially when you are young, you have this

 

[Vektor]

having unprotected sex with the woman you want to divorce is one of those life altering bad decisions with long term consequences. sorry bro

 

[DespicablePeep]

i read earlier about dif interests as well. I think you need to talk to her and be honest.

Everyone you know will call you all the names under the sun if you finish with her when she is pregnant but if she can't do a little of what you want and vice versa then its not worth it.

You need to have it out with her for your sake more than anything.

Big I