Jobs where Nothing Happens

[650lb Sumo]

When I was a bus driver sometimes, especially in winter, I would drive a whole route with no passengers.

Every nuclear power station in the UK is guarded by the Civil Nuclear Constabulary.

They all go through police and armed police training and selection, then probably some extra nuclear police training and selection, and basically nothing happens. I bet you could do a 30 year career and never actually respond to an incident. I wonder what they do all day? Walk around a bit. Drive the car around the site for a bit. Look at CCTV. Seems like that would cover it. Actually from a quick look it seems their main proactive roles are mutual aid, where they go and help other police forces which have suddenly got a lot to do, or spying on nuclear protestors. Security guards aren't allowed guns in the UK so unless you were to make an exception to that rule, if you want armed guards you could only use either the police or the military. There is an elite group of the Marines (43 Commando Fleet Protection Group) who guard the Navy's nuclear weapons, but they rotate them through other jobs as well.

There are a lot of jobs in the military which haven't been needed in decades, but they keep some people trained in that speciality. For tradition/morale/prestige purposes, and for the unlikely event that those skills might suddenly be needed again. So then the trained people can pass on their expertise to the lots of new recruits quickly, kind of like keeping a blast furnace running 24/365 as it takes a long and onerous procedure to switch it off and again to start it.

The UK has the Parachute Regiment, with about 4-5,000 parachute trained soldiers, but there hasn't been a large-scale parachute jump into combat since 1956. It's an obsolete tactic.

The US Army and Marines have jungle warfare schools in Hawaii and Japan although I don't think they have participated in any jungle warfare since 1975 (except maybe small Predator-type missions in Latin America).

From time to time there is a thread on here about the easiest job you ever had, and people have stories of just playing on their phone or watching films on a laptop for a whole shift etc. You used to hear about fake White executives for Chinese companies where you just have to be a say 40-60 year old White guy with a smart suit etc. and look credible as a businessman and carry a briefcase around in the background looking busy, make a cameo here and there, implying that this Chinese company has offices in New York, London etc.

 

[mixmastermo]

 

[Pittie Petey]

Any job I have

 

[Cole train]

My first job ever was working night security for a theme park, didnt do shit

 

[payton]

Mattress sales

 

[UberHere]

Defending satellite communications is a pretty big deal.

 

[I Am Legion]

My buddy just retired as a Port Authority Cop that was in charge of Fire Truck at an airport. In 30 years, he never had an incident. Was on alert during a few storms, ice etc. But nothing else. He watched movies all day.

 

[650lb Sumo]

Defending satellite communications is a pretty big deal.

I thought they did this:

 

[Kowboy On Sherdog]

 

[666]

Security guard working the night shift

 

[VulcanNervPinch]

My buddy just retired as a Port Authority Cop that was in charge of Fire Truck at an airport. In 30 years, he never had an incident. Was on alert during a few storms, ice etc. But nothing else. He watched movies all day.

Then what do you do to unwind when you come home after work?

 

[SSgt Dickweed]

B-b-but, my job is relevant to society.

The book/vid categorized BS jobs as:

1. flunkies, who serve to make their superiors feel important, e.g., receptionists, administrative assistants, door attendants, makers of websites whose sites neglect ease of use and speed for looks.
2. goons, who act to harm or deceive others on behalf of their employer, e.g., lobbyists, corporate lawyers, telemarketers, public relations specialists, community managers
3. duct tapers, who temporarily fix problems that could be fixed permanently, e.g., programmers repairing bloated code, airline desk staff who calm passengers whose bags do not arrive
4. box tickers, who create the appearance that something useful is being done when it is not, e.g., survey administrators, in-house magazine journalists, corporate compliance officers, quality service manager
5. taskmasters, who manage—or create extra work for—those who do not need it, e.g., middle management, leadership professionals

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bullshit_Jobs

 

[Only Here for Attachments]

Real estate broker when you're not active in your own deals and just "managing" agents.

 

[Richmma80]

Maintenance

I watch Netflix and Youtube all day, waiting for the pension to kick in.

 

[560ti]

Semi-conductor headquarters down the street from me has a fitness center for the employees. I worked lifeguarding at the pool, and it was so easy that it was actually bad. Basically, trading time for money no actual work or stress.

Pool was laps only employees only, so the entire job was you watching on average one person an hour swim laps. The only reason they even had the job was in the early 90s two people had cardiac arrest while swimming so the liability insurance for the building demanded that the pool be staffed or the policy would either be revoked or priced out of the ass. I'd say 60% of the day the pool was completely empty and when I worked there they hadn't had even a mild incident in like a decade

 

[650lb Sumo]

Semi-conductor headquarters down the street from me has a fitness center for the employees. I worked lifeguarding at the pool, and it was so easy that it was actually bad. Basically, trading time for money no actual work or stress.

Pool was laps only employees only, so the entire job was you watching on average one person an hour swim laps. The only reason they even had the job was in the early 90s two people had cardiac arrest while swimming so the liability insurance for the building demanded that the pool be staffed or the policy would either be revoked or priced out of the ass. I'd say 60% of the day the pool was completely empty and when I worked there they hadn't had even a mild incident in like a decade

I wouldn't like that. When I was bus driving the more passengers I had the more satisfying I found the job. You can get 90 passengers on a double decker (varies slightly between models). In high season you would have a full load sometimes (lots of tourists). The best part was climbing up a steep hill with a full load of passengers. I felt I was helping people and contributing to society. Driving an empty bus around I felt like a buffoon.

 

[jeff7b9]

Get paid to do nothing jobs are fucking awesome.

I might do some substitute teaching again just to get paid $150 to fuck around on Sherdog and maybe read a book.

I always got a lot of music done and usually could stay in great shape doing those jobs because the job itself didn't drain my energy at all aside from getting up early.

Now I teach music and do real estate and both of those jobs require me to be "ON" and it does take away from the energy I have to pursue my passions in the life, those being music and fitness

 

[aerius]

College classmate works in a commercial greenhouse, she literally sits around all day watching plants grow. Most of the time she's in the control room waiting for something to happen, and a couple times a day she walks around the greenhouse to make sure all the sensors and stuff are working properly.

 

[Jesus X]

Civil Nuclear Constabulary.

That's the most british name for cops. It is a trip that they wear hi vis vests if a person wanted to take over a power plant over there it would make them even easier to shoot.

 

[scorpiorising]

My first job ever was working night security for a theme park, didnt do shit

I used to work as a security guard around the big stadiums in Vancouver. Literally every single night cars would get broken into. I wouldn't even stop them if I saw it happening. I gave no fucks.

I'd goto the bottom level where there were no cameras and Blaze while playing ball hockey.

Another thing I'd do was put a cone in one spot per level. Once the lot filled, there would always be guys coming in begging for spots. I'd say we've got one spot but it's reserved. I'd then offer it for $50 cash.

Extra $150 to $250 a night for me.