Of course you want to give and take. You want the other guy to give you something, and whatever he gives, you take. That's what BJJ and Submission wrestling is all about. It should all come naturally to you, and if you're only going for a specific submission all the time, it's not going to benefit you. Most people have specific techniques they're particularly good at, and in certain positions that's what they most likely will go for, but if one doesn't work you should transition over to something else and not keep wasting time and energy working on it. It's all about flowing smoothly like water, changing shape and moving into any space your opponent opens up. When one door closes another one always opens. You have to keep your eyes open.
I do think that what you said is good to do in sparring and training to help develop technique, but in an actual competition or fight it could mean the difference between winning and losing.