Help, I need to stop intruders

[Tone C]

Claymores ?

Dig a moat ?

Nail spikes?

 

[ralphc1]

Guinea fowl

 

[Osculater]

Get a couple of wolves or game pitbulls to protect your property

 

[El_Dyablo619]

 

[davidlemonparty]

You can get these gas cannons, which you connect to a portable propane or welding gas bottle. They are used to scare wildlife away from crops and industrial facilities and shit.
They are loud as all fuck and sound exactly like a firearm. But no chance of hurting yourself or a dog or an intruder.
You could set one or more up and have them triggered by motion or remotely by you.
Also if the cops come around just say you use them to keep birds off your peanuts or whatever the fuckin shady shit is you're doing on your farm

 

[Uber_Noober]

If you’re going to fire your gun, aim it at the criminal not up in the air. That’s the purpose of having it.

 

[Legumes]

We need more details before we can properly assess the situation. Pictures of the hot wife would be a good start.

 

[j123]

Bruh just put a sign up saying you're a Sherdogger, the enemies of you will trenble before your might of glorious specimen who is:
6'8
300lbs
5% body fat
benches teh 275
wanted by UFC but rejected because you would destroy all their champs at once

I think knives are a good idea,Big fuck off shiny ones.Ones that look like they could skin a crocodile

knives are good because they dont make any noise and the less noise they make,more likely you are to use them.

Shit intruders right up,makes it look like you are serious.

Guns for show,knives for a pro

TS should just get a shield and axe instead. dudes would just say they have the wrong house and just rob his next door neighbor instead, who's 1km away

 

[gondo]

 

[mb23100]

Pre-dig some Graves somewhere hidden. Saves a lot of time.

 

[Contempt]

Post of the thread from the best movie ever made.

Best movie ever made?

 

[Contempt]

There is this awesome, new hi-tech security system that I subscribe to... it's called a rottweiler. Seems to do the trick.

 

[Pizza Werewolf]

Dig a moat , fill it with hungry stuff.

 

[Thrawn33]

You lack imagination and a respect for history.

Heads on spikes every 25 yards of your property line?

Gibbets?

Crosses to.warn them off...for religious reasons

Finally: stake out your territory with a strong warning sign

 

[Contempt]

Dig a moat , fill it with hungry stuff.

Hungry stuff with fricken laser beams?

 

[fingercuffs]

Best movie ever made?

Yeah, I'm not coming up with a witty retort. Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels is my favourite film ever. And that quote was brilliant.

 

[Pizza Werewolf]

Hungry stuff with fricken laser beams?

Some animals like to heat up their food before they eat it.

 

[Contempt]

Some animals like to heat up their food before they eat it.

Don't we all? ...except sushimi.

 

[Contempt]

Yeah, I'm not coming up with a witty retort. Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels is my favourite film ever. And that quote was brilliant.

It has been a long time. I should watch that again.

 

[ocean size]

Suck their dicks, but towards the end do a bad job like use teeth. They won't be back