First date horror stories
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That really pisses me off to no end when a girl calls you gay for not fucking her. Sloppy girls need to get over themselves.
Basement Nerd
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I have another pretty good one that just happened to me... Was out at this Bar with some friends. It was a big place with lots of People and was a friends Birthday so I wasn't really actively looking for a hook-up. Just hanging out with the guys... A group of people both male and female somehow end up hanging out with our group. One of the guy's is clearly a huge douchebag who, to make matters worse is wasted... and keeps telling everyone how much money he has, etc. He finally starts talking to me and he's like "Nooo bro, you gotta join my Company. Give me a number, let's do this!" Which I can only assume was code for "I want to bang you..." So I keep walking around to the other side of the group every time this guy gets anywhere near me. After a little while, he's moved onto a really pretty Italian girl who from across the table. I kind of wink at like "Is this guy for real?" She smiles back and I'm thinking it's on. This guy is not giving up at all and finally, she walks over to me and whispers to me that the guy is really creeping her out and asks if she can pretend she's with me for a bit. I agree, of course... So we get to talking and she's from Chicago, not Seattle. Perfect. After a few drinks, our Group moves to a different part of the City. Her and her friend come with us... We end up taking a ton of shots at the end of the night, some guy tries to hit on her, she shuts him down, he gets real Salty about it and tells her she's a stuck up bitch. Now this guy won't leave her alone... So I intervene and he leaves. And now I know I'm in. We go back to my place for a hook up and she leaves with my number and plans to show her around the City more the next day... Which happens to be her Birthday. I go to bed feeling pretty great about the night and just as I'm about to go to sleep, it happens.
I get a text. The text said she had a lot of fun and that she was looking forward to hanging out tomorrow. I thought... Ok, that's a little weird. But she's drunk and we just hooked up, so whatever. I just get to sleep and I'm woken up by another text. Same thing, but just in a different way. I laughed and figured it was just a Chicago thing. An hour later, I got another text which at this point, I'm not even bothering to answer. I can hear my Buddy who was too drunk to drive laughing in the living room where he was staying on my couch, cause he knew what was up. This continued the whole... entire... night. In the morning I get three texts asking where we're going first. And I'm thinking there's no way I'm meeting this girl now... However, my buddy convinces me that it would be really bad form to leave her hanging on her B-day and tells me she was probably just drunk and being crazy. So I meet up with this girl... and immediatley realize the mistake I've made. She's going on and on telling me about herself and everything seems like the craziest shit ever. My buddy, who was still at my spot had got her girls number she was on vacation with the night before and works out a double date type scenario. And from there it gets even worse... Her and her friend get in a huge fight and she tells me there's no way she's going back to the Hotel and wants to stay with me again. I'm thinking what's one more night... She leaves tomorrow. Yeah, she kept me up all night talking. I asked her if she ever sleeps and she said maybe 4 hours a night... since the 'accident'
Appearantly, she had some brain trauma after her car was hit by a semi-truck. I thought, yeah... This bitch is crazy and dropped her off at the Airport the next day... Never to see her again. Or so I thought
This is where it gets really crazy. She's texting me all day, every day. I felt kind of bad and i'd write back occasionally with one or two word replies... "Oh, nice." or "Solid, have fun." But this chick wasn't getting the message. Finally I get a text that she wants to come back out and see me the following week. I'm like fuck, what do I say here... I couldn't think of anything. So I just didn't respond. I get another text the next day that said "Sorry, I couldn't wait any longer for your response, the deal was running out on Expedia. So I just went with what I thought you'd say... I'm coming out!" I remember just reading that message over and over, like... Am I dreaming right now? What the fuck is going on here... So that weekend comes, she comes out and she's crazier than ever. Like Chuck with that look in his eye... She walks into my place and said "Yeah, we're going to need to put that couch over there. And starts trying to redecorate my place. Asks if I can paint because my place is painted grey, etc. I keep telling her no... We go out to dinner the first night and she's like... I have to talk to you about something. I asked her what was up and she's like "Look, if we're going to do this long distance thing... You're going to need to not be friends with your Ex on FB." At this point, I didn't give a fuck what she thought and I'm like. Yeah, that's crazy. We're not dating, we don't have a long distance thing. To which she replies, "So, you're telling me you're not going to un-add her." I didn't even reply. She gets up, causes a scene and walks out the door." I'm thinking, thank fuck! That bitch is Crazy! I had just settled up and was trying to slink out the back door when she comes in crying and apologizing, etc. I actually ended up taking her back to my place after a few more drinks because truth be told, the sex was incredible. End up going to sleep. I woke up the next day to a bunch of calls from my little Brother and my Mom. I call back and learn that my Dad had something like a Heart Attack and was in the ER. I roll out immediatly not even thinking about leaving this girl in my place alone. She kept calling and leaving these messages the whole time acting like we'd been married for years and asking about my Dad. I just ignored all of it. When I came back, she was gone... But half of my apartment was painted Cream, everything was moved around, she'd gone through my closet to organize some of my things. I was in total shock.
I never talked to her again. And it was literally the craziest girl I've ever met... Save for maybe the Horse Mask Girl. She told me about her Podcast before I left though, and I'll occasionally tune into it because she's fucking hot... But I've ignored every single contact she's attempted. She gave up around a month and a half later.
I dare anyone to beat that...
I get a text. The text said she had a lot of fun and that she was looking forward to hanging out tomorrow. I thought... Ok, that's a little weird. But she's drunk and we just hooked up, so whatever. I just get to sleep and I'm woken up by another text. Same thing, but just in a different way. I laughed and figured it was just a Chicago thing. An hour later, I got another text which at this point, I'm not even bothering to answer. I can hear my Buddy who was too drunk to drive laughing in the living room where he was staying on my couch, cause he knew what was up. This continued the whole... entire... night. In the morning I get three texts asking where we're going first. And I'm thinking there's no way I'm meeting this girl now... However, my buddy convinces me that it would be really bad form to leave her hanging on her B-day and tells me she was probably just drunk and being crazy. So I meet up with this girl... and immediatley realize the mistake I've made. She's going on and on telling me about herself and everything seems like the craziest shit ever. My buddy, who was still at my spot had got her girls number she was on vacation with the night before and works out a double date type scenario. And from there it gets even worse... Her and her friend get in a huge fight and she tells me there's no way she's going back to the Hotel and wants to stay with me again. I'm thinking what's one more night... She leaves tomorrow. Yeah, she kept me up all night talking. I asked her if she ever sleeps and she said maybe 4 hours a night... since the 'accident'
Appearantly, she had some brain trauma after her car was hit by a semi-truck. I thought, yeah... This bitch is crazy and dropped her off at the Airport the next day... Never to see her again. Or so I thought This is where it gets really crazy. She's texting me all day, every day. I felt kind of bad and i'd write back occasionally with one or two word replies... "Oh, nice." or "Solid, have fun." But this chick wasn't getting the message. Finally I get a text that she wants to come back out and see me the following week. I'm like fuck, what do I say here... I couldn't think of anything. So I just didn't respond. I get another text the next day that said "Sorry, I couldn't wait any longer for your response, the deal was running out on Expedia. So I just went with what I thought you'd say... I'm coming out!" I remember just reading that message over and over, like... Am I dreaming right now? What the fuck is going on here... So that weekend comes, she comes out and she's crazier than ever. Like Chuck with that look in his eye... She walks into my place and said "Yeah, we're going to need to put that couch over there. And starts trying to redecorate my place. Asks if I can paint because my place is painted grey, etc. I keep telling her no... We go out to dinner the first night and she's like... I have to talk to you about something. I asked her what was up and she's like "Look, if we're going to do this long distance thing... You're going to need to not be friends with your Ex on FB." At this point, I didn't give a fuck what she thought and I'm like. Yeah, that's crazy. We're not dating, we don't have a long distance thing. To which she replies, "So, you're telling me you're not going to un-add her." I didn't even reply. She gets up, causes a scene and walks out the door." I'm thinking, thank fuck! That bitch is Crazy! I had just settled up and was trying to slink out the back door when she comes in crying and apologizing, etc. I actually ended up taking her back to my place after a few more drinks because truth be told, the sex was incredible. End up going to sleep. I woke up the next day to a bunch of calls from my little Brother and my Mom. I call back and learn that my Dad had something like a Heart Attack and was in the ER. I roll out immediatly not even thinking about leaving this girl in my place alone. She kept calling and leaving these messages the whole time acting like we'd been married for years and asking about my Dad. I just ignored all of it. When I came back, she was gone... But half of my apartment was painted Cream, everything was moved around, she'd gone through my closet to organize some of my things. I was in total shock.
I never talked to her again. And it was literally the craziest girl I've ever met... Save for maybe the Horse Mask Girl. She told me about her Podcast before I left though, and I'll occasionally tune into it because she's fucking hot... But I've ignored every single contact she's attempted. She gave up around a month and a half later.
I dare anyone to beat that...
I have a horror story, not really a first date, but definitely some surprises.
This girl I had dated back in High School got in touch with me because she wanted to catch up after 10 years or so. This should have been the first red flag. I actually reluctantly started talking to her, thinking that it would be a waste of time, but we sort of hit it off.
She actually lives a few hours away, but figuring we're both mature and living situations can easily change, we decided to try out dating. Went on a few dates which went well, except of course I noticed she had a box of Pall Malls in her purse. Who the fuck smokes Pall Malls? Second red flag.
Anyway, we set up a weekend for me to stay with her. She asked what dinner to have prepared and I told her to surprise me but that I wasn't really wanting anything spicy. I get near her place after the 3 hour drive, asking specifically where it was, and I told her "hey, this In n Out is looking pretty good about now", joking of course, but she got legitimately offended and annoyed. Not taking a joke=red flag #3. I got near her apartment where parking was a bitch, she lives in a busy area of town, but I found one after about 15min. She sighed, impatiently, and said she would come down and show me where her place was.
I get inside and her place has a kind of foul smell, then I notice a fucking guinea pig just cruising around the apartment. Odd. So I sit down and she's got a meal prepared, but it's fucking spicy as all hell. I tell her and her reply is, "I didn't even really put any spice in there". Really bitch?...I'm thinking. So then she jumps up and starts making me something else to eat in a pissy mood. Her attitude is nothing like before when we first caught up. Another red flag.
So, after dinner we start having some drinks, and she gets hammered within an hour. I'm thinking "...okay?" Well, if there was a good part it's now. As we're lying down watching a TV show, she tells me I smell great then starts rubbing my groin. Then she says she wants me to fuck her titties so bad. Of course I oblige. I'm doing my thing and she says to "fuck my face baby" and to "make me gag"...I'm like "fuck yeah" After a bit I lay down so she can do some work, but then she just complains that I'm too big and gives the saddest BJ.
Fast forward a bit after I finish and she says she's ready to lie down.
I'm woken up around 4am after she rips a nasty one right on me. I left the room and slept on the couch, fucking traumatized. I don't even know what # red flag this is, but my mood is shot and I'm over it - even after she let me face fuck her.
To wrap it up, the next day was awkward to say the least. That night, I was up all night thinking "How the fuck am I going to calls this off early so I can gtfo". So around 5am, I shook her arm and said I was leaving and that this wasn't going to work out. She of course was like "wtf!?", but I was able to get the hell out of dodge...forgot to mention, I dropped my keys and they got kicked under her couch, slid them out and some guinea pig poo slid out with them, gross!
I suspect she was bat shit fucking crazy, but I didn't expect it judging by her looks.
This girl I had dated back in High School got in touch with me because she wanted to catch up after 10 years or so. This should have been the first red flag. I actually reluctantly started talking to her, thinking that it would be a waste of time, but we sort of hit it off.
She actually lives a few hours away, but figuring we're both mature and living situations can easily change, we decided to try out dating. Went on a few dates which went well, except of course I noticed she had a box of Pall Malls in her purse. Who the fuck smokes Pall Malls? Second red flag.
Anyway, we set up a weekend for me to stay with her. She asked what dinner to have prepared and I told her to surprise me but that I wasn't really wanting anything spicy. I get near her place after the 3 hour drive, asking specifically where it was, and I told her "hey, this In n Out is looking pretty good about now", joking of course, but she got legitimately offended and annoyed. Not taking a joke=red flag #3. I got near her apartment where parking was a bitch, she lives in a busy area of town, but I found one after about 15min. She sighed, impatiently, and said she would come down and show me where her place was.
I get inside and her place has a kind of foul smell, then I notice a fucking guinea pig just cruising around the apartment. Odd. So I sit down and she's got a meal prepared, but it's fucking spicy as all hell. I tell her and her reply is, "I didn't even really put any spice in there". Really bitch?...I'm thinking. So then she jumps up and starts making me something else to eat in a pissy mood. Her attitude is nothing like before when we first caught up. Another red flag.
So, after dinner we start having some drinks, and she gets hammered within an hour. I'm thinking "...okay?" Well, if there was a good part it's now. As we're lying down watching a TV show, she tells me I smell great then starts rubbing my groin. Then she says she wants me to fuck her titties so bad. Of course I oblige. I'm doing my thing and she says to "fuck my face baby" and to "make me gag"...I'm like "fuck yeah" After a bit I lay down so she can do some work, but then she just complains that I'm too big and gives the saddest BJ.
Fast forward a bit after I finish and she says she's ready to lie down.
I'm woken up around 4am after she rips a nasty one right on me. I left the room and slept on the couch, fucking traumatized. I don't even know what # red flag this is, but my mood is shot and I'm over it - even after she let me face fuck her.
To wrap it up, the next day was awkward to say the least. That night, I was up all night thinking "How the fuck am I going to calls this off early so I can gtfo". So around 5am, I shook her arm and said I was leaving and that this wasn't going to work out. She of course was like "wtf!?", but I was able to get the hell out of dodge...forgot to mention, I dropped my keys and they got kicked under her couch, slid them out and some guinea pig poo slid out with them, gross!
I suspect she was bat shit fucking crazy, but I didn't expect it judging by her looks.
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I have another pretty good one that just happened to me... Was out at this Bar with some friends. It was a big place with lots of People and was a friends Birthday so I wasn't really actively looking for a hook-up. Just hanging out with the guys... A group of people both male and female somehow end up hanging out with our group. One of the guy's is clearly a huge douchebag who, to make matters worse is wasted... and keeps telling everyone how much money he has, etc. He finally starts talking to me and he's like "Nooo bro, you gotta join my Company. Give me a number, let's do this!" Which I can only assume was code for "I want to bang you..." So I keep walking around to the other side of the group every time this guy gets anywhere near me. After a little while, he's moved onto a really pretty Italian girl who from across the table. I kind of wink at like "Is this guy for real?" She smiles back and I'm thinking it's on. This guy is not giving up at all and finally, she walks over to me and whispers to me that the guy is really creeping her out and asks if she can pretend she's with me for a bit. I agree, of course... So we get to talking and she's from Chicago, not Seattle. Perfect. After a few drinks, our Group moves to a different part of the City. Her and her friend come with us... We end up taking a ton of shots at the end of the night, some guy tries to hit on her, she shuts him down, he gets real Salty about it and tells her she's a stuck up bitch. Now this guy won't leave her alone... So I intervene and he leaves. And now I know I'm in. We go back to my place for a hook up and she leaves with my number and plans to show her around the City more the next day... Which happens to be her Birthday. I go to bed feeling pretty great about the night and just as I'm about to go to sleep, it happens.
I get a text. The text said she had a lot of fun and that she was looking forward to hanging out tomorrow. I thought... Ok, that's a little weird. But she's drunk and we just hooked up, so whatever. I just get to sleep and I'm woken up by another text. Same thing, but just in a different way. I laughed and figured it was just a Chicago thing. An hour later, I got another text which at this point, I'm not even bothering to answer. I can hear my Buddy who was too drunk to drive laughing in the living room where he was staying on my couch, cause he knew what was up. This continued the whole... entire... night. In the morning I get three texts asking where we're going first. And I'm thinking there's no way I'm meeting this girl now... However, my buddy convinces me that it would be really bad form to leave her hanging on her B-day and tells me she was probably just drunk and being crazy. So I meet up with this girl... and immediatley realize the mistake I've made. She's going on and on telling me about herself and everything seems like the craziest shit ever. My buddy, who was still at my spot had got her girls number she was on vacation with the night before and works out a double date type scenario. And from there it gets even worse... Her and her friend get in a huge fight and she tells me there's no way she's going back to the Hotel and wants to stay with me again. I'm thinking what's one more night... She leaves tomorrow. Yeah, she kept me up all night talking. I asked her if she ever sleeps and she said maybe 4 hours a night... since the 'accident'
This is where it gets really crazy. She's texting me all day, every day. I felt kind of bad and i'd write back occasionally with one or two word replies... "Oh, nice." or "Solid, have fun." But this chick wasn't getting the message. Finally I get a text that she wants to come back out and see me the following week. I'm like fuck, what do I say here... I couldn't think of anything. So I just didn't respond. I get another text the next day that said "Sorry, I couldn't wait any longer for your response, the deal was running out on Expedia. So I just went with what I thought you'd say... I'm coming out!" I remember just reading that message over and over, like... Am I dreaming right now? What the fuck is going on here... So that weekend comes, she comes out and she's crazier than ever. Like Chuck with that look in his eye... She walks into my place and said "Yeah, we're going to need to put that couch over there. And starts trying to redecorate my place. Asks if I can paint because my place is painted grey, etc. I keep telling her no... We go out to dinner the first night and she's like... I have to talk to you about something. I asked her what was up and she's like "Look, if we're going to do this long distance thing... You're going to need to not be friends with your Ex on FB." At this point, I didn't give a fuck what she thought and I'm like. Yeah, that's crazy. We're not dating, we don't have a long distance thing. To which she replies, "So, you're telling me you're not going to un-add her." I didn't even reply. She gets up, causes a scene and walks out the door." I'm thinking, thank fuck! That bitch is Crazy! I had just settled up and was trying to slink out the back door when she comes in crying and apologizing, etc. I actually ended up taking her back to my place after a few more drinks because truth be told, the sex was incredible. End up going to sleep. I woke up the next day to a bunch of calls from my little Brother and my Mom. I call back and learn that my Dad had something like a Heart Attack and was in the ER. I roll out immediatly not even thinking about leaving this girl in my place alone. She kept calling and leaving these messages the whole time acting like we'd been married for years and asking about my Dad. I just ignored all of it. When I came back, she was gone... But half of my apartment was painted Cream, everything was moved around, she'd gone through my closet to organize some of my things. I was in total shock.
I never talked to her again. And it was literally the craziest girl I've ever met... Save for maybe the Horse Mask Girl. She told me about her Podcast before I left though, and I'll occasionally tune into it because she's fucking hot... But I've ignored every single contact she's attempted. She gave up around a month and a half later.
I dare anyone to beat that...
How did she know where you lived?
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You mean when she came back out? She had stayed at my place the first time she was out in Seattle... And I even agreed to meet her when she came back out. Why? I have no idea. lol. I almost didn't. She flew in at 11 and I was drinking at the bar we were meeting downtown waiting for her. Got Drunk, met another girl and just about said fuck it... But I ended up answering her call when she got in. Terrible idea.
Your story was funny as hell. There was Guinnea Pig poop on your Keys?!
You dodged a HUGE bullet dude. She does sound kinky, though!You mean when she came back out? She had stayed at my place the first time she was out in Seattle... And I even agreed to meet her when she came back out. Why? I have no idea. lol. I almost didn't. She flew in at 11 and I was drinking at the bar we were meeting downtown waiting for her. Got Drunk, met another girl and just about said fuck it... But I ended up answering her call when she got in. Terrible idea.
Your story was funny as hell. There was Guinnea Pig poop on your Keys?!
gotcha
Forgot to mention, we didn't bang(thank god), but she had her toy while we were fooling around and she told me to tell her that I wanted to get her pregnant because it turns her on
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gotcha
Forgot to mention, we didn't bang(thank god), but she had her toy while we were fooling around and she told me to tell her that I wanted to get her pregnant because it turns her on
Oh
My
God
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I was like 14 about to be 15 and she was 18, this girl was smokin hot haha i got lucky or somethin, we went to the movies and the right there next to the theatre was a lil club or bar type thing that we got into, some guy was trying to feed us beers which I declined (club is now closed) im a very shy type person, i usually keep to myself. so the whole thing there was weird. anyways she took me home with her. i had to wait outside for like an hour to sneak in and when i finally got in there she was all over me, I was a virgin at the time, so I got scared and bitched out. she just turned over and went to sleep. I was 30 miles from home with no ride so I just stayed there until morning and then snuck out and waited for a ride.
Not reall a horror story or another but I'm a bitch and that's all I got, sorry
Not reall a horror story or another but I'm a bitch and that's all I got, sorry
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I'd disown my son if he came home and told me that.
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I did end up bangin later on, don't hate me for ever fierce haha
Oh
My
God
Yeah dude, this just fucking happened. I'm kinda scarred
Your story was a bit crazier, but I'm sure mine was just as batshit crazy.
Fucking Pall Malls and "accidents"!
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My first real date I took my date to see Jaws and she got do scared she tried to chew my fingernails after chewing off all hers.
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I stopped reading right here. The answer is heroin and meth addicts.
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Dude, you fucked her, she decorated and organized your apartment. What the fuck do you want?
Oh
My
God
Already getting phantom suicide texts....fml
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lol, what'd she say?
I just glanced at the text before I deleted it, but something about "you are letting me down as a friend....I'm thinking of taking my life"
fuck, gives me shivers just thinking about it. I've been with several girls and women, dating or otherwise, and she's the second to tell me some crazy shit. Another said she was pregnant after we dated for 2 months.
I'm fairly certain I kept any personal info of mine away from her, but I'm a little concerned.
So glad I got outta dodge....
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