i finally did it....i made a glorious queen sacrifice!
although it didn't go over exactly the way i had envisioned. i didn't forsee her bishop getting into the line of my attack and that threw a monkey wrench in my plans. so then i decided to unceremoniously sacrifice my bishop, because fuck you that's why.
even though all hope may have already been lost, seeing that king pinned over in the cucks corner was far too enticing for me to not keep going after.
so what did i do? i did what any chess legend would do after exchanging their queen and their bishop for a rook, and i gave up my rook in exchange for her bishop and her being in a much more advantageous position, and my dreams of the easy checkmate becoming dead. sounds like a fair trade....said no chess player ever!
bye bye queen. bye bye bishop. bye bye rook. i just clowned myself. i moved up my pawn to block one of their pawns, awaiting my fate in a game i quickly squashed my opportunity of winning. the dream is now dead....or not!
after all the exchanges ensued apparently my opponent must have still been completely oblivious as to just how vulnerable her king was and where i was trying to attack from. so after moving my pawn up to b4, she decided that her best move to make was to threaten my pawn, which was not going anywhere and was absolutely no threat to anything.
well, sadly for her she wouldn't be using that queen to capture that pawn. instead she would be surrendering her queen to me while her king sat in the corner and waited for his turn to be mated.
i hope little miss lia cried salty tears of unfathomable sadness when she realised just how embarassingly she was about to lose that game. i mean it's one thing to get mated, and another thing to know that youre inevitably about to get mated, but it's really something special to already know that you're going to get mated but you gotta watch your queen get pounded out first.
that's a wrap boys. another glorious bongcloud victory! complete with 3 sacrifices that some would have to question, but me i'm calling it a tactical display of brilliance because it still gained the end result i was after!
i think this is going to be my last game. and i wouldn't want it any other way. i've became a legend at the sport and accomplished all there is to accomplish in the world of chess. it started with the scholars mate and today it ends with the bongcloud and a glorious queen sacrifice.
i would like to thank my coaches, my sponsors, the liquor store, and my drug dealers. i couldn't have fucked over and victimized so many chess players with my bullshit without your support. it means everything to me. art of the draw and hail to the king baby!
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