Bullying

Discussion in 'Grappling Technique' started by Cash Bill 52, Mar 18, 2008.

  1. Cash Bill 52 Brown Belt

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    Bullying

    For some reason there has been a sudden surge of bullying at my school. (I teach second grade) We are dedicating tomorrow
     
  2. codemonkey76 Black Belt

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    basically the kds who bully aren't given either enough direction or discipline and the parents just let them run riot. The reason martial arts classes "work" is because instead of being at home getting away with anything, they get discipline in the gym.

    If you learn disicpline and self-control, you are less likely to be bullied or to bully others. Also bullies tend to pick on kids who are self-conscious and lack in confidence, martial arts training gives you confidence, so you are less likely to get picked on and also less likely to have to use your training
     
  3. Timbaland Black Belt

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    Yea I agree with code monkey on this. The bullies don't receive enough guidance and discipline. I think they attack the kids who appear timid and shy. If I knew a kid getting bulled at school, I would teach him how to throw a good right cross. :)

    Most of the time bullies will leave a kid alone if he fights back, even if the bully ends up kicking his ass.
     
  4. Mr Bosco Guest

    Your the teacher.

    It is up to you and your peers to enforce discipline and make it clear physical and mental abuse is not accepted.

    Failing this those who are guilty bullying should be given a warning to stop. If they cannot control their impulses they should be asked to leave the school and the situation explained to their parents. Teachers are helpless against problem students because of the legal system which typifies the U.S.

    This is one reason why if I have childeren I would never send them to a public or private school.
     
  5. Cash Bill 52 Brown Belt

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    Discipline and self control are key. Thanks Code Monkey. Bullying has probably been around since the cave man days. Putting people down to destroy their confidence in the quest for resources. Some Darwinian struggle.

    I so much want to quote one of my teammates tomorrow... Tell a kid to say to the bully, "I aint no bitch!"

    ...Somehow I don't think that would go over too well.
     
  6. codemonkey76 Black Belt

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    at my kids school they have been taught to "do the high 5" which involves 5 steps of action to seal with a bully with the final 1 being to report it to the teacher... i have told my kids if someone hits them, don't take it hit em back... i don't give a fuck if i get called in to the school and they get in trouble for "not doing the high-5" the only thing a bully understands is "shit i guess that person isn't the easy target i thought they were" and move on to someone easier
     
  7. Cash Bill 52 Brown Belt

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    Do you have the same suggestion for all kids? I mean, I agree with you. I wouldn't want my kid not fighting back either. I think a measured response is appropriate. I don't want the bully to get suplexed on the concrete for making fun of a kid's braces.

    The other point to the argument is for the kid to accept the consequence for fighting back. A boy was teased this week and retaliated by giving some good scratch marks on the arm. The consequence was a day of recess on the bench. The parent and the kid would not accept the consequence.

    The kids who teased him had to write apology letters and the parents were called in to see the principal.

    I've been teaching for 11 years and I have never seen the problem this bad before.
     
  8. Q mystic Silver Belt

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  9. Cash Bill 52 Brown Belt

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  10. bullies generally are not getting their ass beaten at home enough or at all.

    Spare the rod, spoil the child. i've had to spank my kid maybe 4 times in his 9 years. i stress to him when i drop him off at school to make friends, be nice, never to single anyone out. if i ever heard of him doing any of these things, i would be infuriated.

    i don't want him to be a sissy, and he is in martial arts to learn how to protect himself. (he is small for his age, as i was) i try to keep up with his friends and ask him if there are any kids that are new or don't seem to fit in. if so, i tell him to make it a point to befriend that school.

    always using the thought, "how would he feel if he were that kid, or if someone were picking on him"
     
  11. IChinaManI Green Belt

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    Meh, works for the diaz brothers haha.
     
  12. codemonkey76 Black Belt

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    i completely agree with you, i don't mean for my kid to punch someone in the head or as you so eloquently put it (suplex them on the concrete) lol, for being verbally bullied, but a lot of the techniques they teach the kids in dealing with the bullying only really work if it is verbal... if someone is pushing your head into the dirt, of physically assaulting you, ignoring them aint gonna work, neither is talking nicely to them... you gotta lay the smack down if that's what they are doing to you... Sorry if i come off as bitter, but i was bullied myself as a child and never had the guys (confidence) to stand up for myself.
     
  13. Socal Duck White Belt

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    I have a second grader and we have gone around this situation. The sad truth is in male groups there are pecking orders. What creates bullies is almost a non issue, they are there. Boys will be tested. In the end there is very little an institution can do to completely eliminate bullies. My wife has had a hard time with this reality.

    When I was in grade school we had the "bike rack" where you had to stand or run. It was not about winning or losing the fights (and I lost some) but standing up. (I wish I had been trained in a MA). I've told my boy I'll stand by him in the principles office if he's just standing up, but if he picks the fight there will be hell to pay.
     
  14. andrewbc Purple Belt

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    the martial arts not only help kids who are being bullied but also the bullies themselves. even amongst the adults in my school bullying is identified and dealt with immediately, usually by my coach putting the fear of god into said bullies. the same principle can be applied to children, by explaining to the child that there are consequences to bullying, the cycle could be broken and that is what parents are failing to do.
     
  15. Libersolis**** Orange Belt

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    Bullied kid by armbar
     
  16. Cro Cop Is Back Red Belt

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    the bullied kid should take the bully down with him and pull guard, lets see how his popularity goes from there
     
  17. JohnnyBuddha Brown Belt

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    I can't stand bullies at any age. As for your questions:

    Why do you think people bully (tease, harass, insult, demean) others?

    Don't quite understand why. Like some have said, sometimes the kids aren't taught much self-control or discipline at home. Of course, some bullies are bullied/abused at home too. It's hard to imagine, but some bullies might not know how to feel empathy--they don't know how to put themselves in the shoes of the other person.

    What role do you think educators play in the solution to this problem?

    There was a book about the Columbine shootings written a while back that talked about the importance of teaching kids how to cooperate more and be able to empathize with each other. I'm generally in favor of something like this, though it is more of a long-term, curriculum-based solution. It's a little controversial for "values" to be taught in school, but I think it's needed. I remember a grade 3 and 5 teacher of mine always talked about moral issues and taught us to treat others as we'd like to be treated.
     
  18. Flexwave2003 International Playboy

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    Ive dealt with bullies my entire life, and have found reporting them to teachers rarely did any good. I would still get bullied and there generally wasnt much done about the fact they did.

    What I found that worked, was whipping their damn ass! Of course the principle always looked at me like I was the trouble maker when the bully walked in with a bloody nose, and ofcourse I would get in trouble for it ultimately but it put a stop to the bullying dead in its tracks.
     
  19. Gsoares2*** Banned Banned

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    kids are going to be kids. They bully because they are insecure, and are looking for some thing or someone to make them laugh. Bullying gives them a purpose in the school.. If they are not the bully, they are just some dumb kid.

    So in eyes of the socialy acceptable.. being a bully is perfectly acceptable. It gives the bully a name amongst the other kid, and gives him recognition.

    Find an avenue for bully's to express them selves and be a part of a group, in order to eliminate it. Group sports are good, but often inflame the issue as the bullying continues on the team. Individual sports like martial arts help out great deals..

    The kids essentially need a role model, or coach to look up to. Someone they actualy want to be like. The majority of teachers are fat, ugly, unhappy.. What kid wants to grow up to be that?
     
  20. $uperman Black Belt Platinum Member

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    edit.
     
    Last edited: Oct 4, 2011

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