Bodybuilding Kangaroo vs Python

Discussion in 'Mayberry Lounge' started by faustian, Aug 18, 2015.

  1. faustian

    faustian I'M NOT A MONSTER Platinum Member

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    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]


    Who takes it?

    Kangaroo gets to choose between using either brass knuckles or those talon things that cockfighters use.

    I'm going with the kangaroo. He would soccer kick and GnP the python's head into hamburger.

    What are your thoughts?
     
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  2. Prime Ang

    Prime Ang Kang Banned

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    Kangaroo easily. Wouldn't even be a close matchup imo.
     
  3. Ed Banger

    Ed Banger Purple Belt

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    Kangaroos have some excellent technique

    [​IMG]
     
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  4. PUO3

    PUO3 You are a can. Staff Member Senior Moderator

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    There is no fucking chance that C-level can python can touch the Kangaroo's athleticism.

    Kangaroo via whatever he wants in round 1.
     
  5. Ehrmantraut

    Ehrmantraut Real American Platinum Member

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    If that python could use some sort of sneak attack I think it might be able to choke out that Kangaroo. Although the Kangaroo might just be able to grab it and skin in with it's bare hands, wouldn't even need to use the talons.
     
  6. HARRISON_3

    HARRISON_3 Gold Belt

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    Is the kangaroo game?
     
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  7. korean blood

    korean blood Keep tracks that make an Arab thief clap Platinum Member

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    Kangaroo would maul that python
     
  8. lakersfan45

    lakersfan45 That's sardo! No mr, accent on the do!

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    where is this fight taking place? couldnt a snake just leap and bite its face off?

    i got snake.
     
  9. Revolver

    Revolver you sound poor Staff Member Senior Moderator

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    lol, this would be the biggest one sided beat down since Childs whooped on Kobe. Kangaroo wins this by how ever he wants.
     
  10. LionExMachina

    LionExMachina There are No Pacts between Lions and Sherdogs. Banned

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    A kangeroo has much better footwork.
     
  11. faustian

    faustian I'M NOT A MONSTER Platinum Member

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    If the kangaroo is successful they could then recruit kangaroos to murder pythons in the wild. Pythons are a big problem in Florida and are inherently evil.
     
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  12. Ehrmantraut

    Ehrmantraut Real American Platinum Member

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    Python has a much better ground game though. Roided Kangaroo probably gasses out if it goes there.
     
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  13. faustian

    faustian I'M NOT A MONSTER Platinum Member

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    Looking at that kangaroo's biceps he could probably literally just rip the python in half if the python bit his face
     
  14. Revolver

    Revolver you sound poor Staff Member Senior Moderator

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    Pytons are the least of Florida's worries. I'd be more worried about chimp with an AK
     
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  15. Ehrmantraut

    Ehrmantraut Real American Platinum Member

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    I agree. Sometimes I trap possums and pythons and just let them scrap. Takes care of at least one problem creature and sometimes both.
     
  16. PUO3

    PUO3 You are a can. Staff Member Senior Moderator

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    The only thing the snake can do is grapple and as shown above the kangaroo can grapple at an elite level against superior athletes.
     
  17. The One True

    The One True GOAT Of All Time

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    at first glance the answer seems obvious - kangaroo. he would certainly be the betting favorite no doubt. but let's not be so quick to dismiss the python

    right off the bat, you can never count out poisons. everybody knows pythons have some of the most lethal poisons in the snake kingdom. that's mama nature's version of the 'puncher's chance' - one lucky bite and it's all over, the kangaroo will die from supreme poisons overdose (SPO). but that isn't the python's only means to a W in this bout. python has a very low center of gravity and is a difficult target to hit clean, kangaroo's best weapon (drop kicks) are simply useless in this bout. stomps are an option but not nearly as powerful as its missile toe drop kick. the kangaroo's boxing would also be nullified because he'd have to basically punch the ground, any boxer worth his salt knows you never punch downward, lose all your power that way

    the more i think about it, the more i think the python really surprises people in this one. i see it wrapping around a leg and cutting off circulation. meanwhile the kangaroo is clawing at it but the python's skin is no joke, made of tuff stuff. python then goes for a lethal bite and from that point on its countdown to death by supreme poisons overdose (SPO)
     
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  18. PUO3

    PUO3 You are a can. Staff Member Senior Moderator

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    Will there be drug testing?
     
  19. Skydome

    Skydome Banned Banned

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    Yeah I wouldn't even let my pup or child outside if I knew a python could be lurking just around the corner.

    I think the python takes the fight into the water and drowns the kangaroo after it gases. All those muscles will be good in a 1 round fight, but once you get to the championship rounds the snakes cardio will take over.
     
  20. faustian

    faustian I'M NOT A MONSTER Platinum Member

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    Kangaroo is a marsupials so I'm pretty sure it's immune to snake poisons. It's a big reason why large marsupialses dominate Australia as the continent's #1 apex predator.

    Stomps and good old fashioned GnP would be all the kangaroo would need here. And like I said before if the snake did grab a limb or face the kangaroo can likely rip the snake's body in half.
     
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