You assume he hasn't talked to her. The way he's all defeated when talking about it, he definitely has talked to her and she refuses to hear it. So I can see why he's like "Fuck it, might as well talk to my buddies about it" since nothing he says changes the situation. It also sounds like she's been with her mother in the NL for a while, and has gotten her mind poisoned by the fruitcake friends at school, her mother, social media, etc. His conclusion is that the only way to prevent it is to be close to your kids when they're growing up, otherwise they can get corrupted by other influences. So he's done the diagnostic in his mind, understands what went wrong, but is powerless to change it.