Update: January 4, 2013
Milburn's Idiotic Behavior in PROMETHEUS Finally Explained
Ridley Scott's Prometheus was one of the most anticipated films in 2012 but turned out to be a huge disappointment thanks largely in part to its annoying and obnoxious characters. We now take a look at Milburn (Rafe Spall), one of the said moronic characters in the film, and try to explain some of his inexplicable dumb actions, like petting the space cobra and other foolish behaviors. There's only one logical explanation why a well-educated biologist would act in such a idiotic manner. Milburn is clearly a homosexual. Below is a list of irrefutable proof to support this theory:
1. Milburn immediately zeroes in on Fifield (Sean Harris) at the mess hall, sits down at his table, and introduces himself with a creepy schoolgirl-crush smile. Milburn doesn't even bother introducing himself to another crew member directly seating besides Fifield. This anonymous crew member looked to be decently dressed and civilized, all good qualities for a potential friend. But nooooo, Milburn is more drawn to the mohawked heavily-tattooed serial killer-looking Fifield. Go figure. (Who in Weyland Industries screens these assholes??)
2. At the debriefing, Fifield belittles Shaw's star map and Milburn is the only one grinning like an idiot. And when Fifield puts down Shaw's Engineer theory and Milburn laughed like it's the greatest fucking joke he has ever heard in his life.
3. When Fifield has a nervous breakdown inside the alien building and asks who wants to join him back to the ship, Milburn happily says yes. [In Bane's voice] But of course. Milburn, abandoning his natural scientific curiosity, hopes to get some quality time with his BFF.
Fifield >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> potentially the greatest scientific discovery of mankind ever
4. Fifield and Milburn get lost inside the alien structure. I'm pretty sure Milburn mislead them and intentionally got themselves lost so that he could spend an uninterrupted romantic evening with Fifield.
5. When Fifield freaks out at seeing the cobra alien life form, Milburn takes this opportunity to show Fifield that he is boyfriend material by petting the snake against his better judgment.
6. Before the cobra enters Milburn's mouth, if you listen really carefully, you can hear Milburn's faint death cry,
"I love you, Fifield..."