Not in the mood. Have you ever convinced someone to have sex and is that bad?

[ralphc1]

Women have it easier. bout all they have to do to convince a man to have sex is undress.

 

[Peteyandjia]

No one is suggesting nagging here. Certainly not me. I am suggesting the opposite of nagging.

There have been times where I have found my partner super sexy for whatever odd reason at that time of day and she might not have been in that frame of mind and you start to get playful and she says something like 'not now I am not in the mood'. But as you continue to playfully push she feels how much you are in the mood and into her in that moment. Girls can and do find a guys passion for them hot and it CAN change their mood and suddenly she can be horny too simply reacting to how horny you are.

I've had some of my most spontaneous and hottest sex that way when neither of us, was thinking about and then suddenly a mood hits and you make it happen.

oh and btw it goes both ways. Many times the gals I've been dating got me in the mood when I wasn't prior because I could sense how in the mood they were.

Krrame, for one states that is wrong. You either both are or not simultaneously and any attempt to change the other is wrong and abuse.

Yeah, I see the difference. If two people have an established sexual rapport and it's just an 'eh I don't feel like it' not in the mood, vs. a real 'no', then in that case nagging can be harmlessly cute at worst, or at best turn to hot. As long as a person respects 'no' then I see no problem with it.

When a person who does not have that kind of relationship is just continually trying to get in the pants of someone who is clearly not interested, then it's a different creepy story.

 

[Happy Man]

I won't say that nagging someone to have sex with you is akin to rape, but I will say that it's the opposite of hot.

I've never understood why anyone would want to pressure someone into sex. A large part of the appeal of sex (for me anyway) is that the person *wants* to have it with you. If that's not there, then it's not meant to be.

This may be accurate for some. However in my relationship whenever my girl was in a bad mood about something, it was my job to get her into the mood for sex. I was always successful. If I had to start rubbing feet on the couch and working a slow massage up the legs until I get to the spot then that's what I'm going to do. If I have to say dumb joke after dumb joke to get her to laugh I will. I don't care if it takes an hour of warming her up. I'd say I have about a 99%ish success rate.

its definitely up to the man to get the woman into the mood if she's not at first.

 

[Wrath of Foamy]

Women have it easier. bout all they have to do to convince a man to have sex is undress.

Rapist pieces of shit.

 

[Horse Style]

Why would anyone give anything @Kframe says enough thought to make a thread about it?

 

[Kframe]

That sounds like some modern dickless social justice triggered little coward shit to me.

If you turn her on, good for both of you. If you're just verbally harassing her and she gives in to stop your begging that's a little pathetic. In neither case is there anything overtly incorrect at play.

Because I think that we should respect their words when they say No, i am triggered SJW? You are aware of the massive rape problem in America right? It's not masculine to coerce a woman to fuck you, its bullshit is what it is. Why would you want to fuck someone who really didn't want to be with you in the first place?

Wouldn't it be better if the partner actually wanted to be with you and it required no coercion? It's called clear and concise communication, both sexes need to learn it. Your yes should mean yes, and your no should mean no. No more of the games. Honest and frank communication by both the male and female should be the rule of our society, not dominance games by PUA's.

 

[Kframe]

Why would anyone give anything @Kframe says enough thought to make a thread about it?

I honestly have to agree with this.. Not one person on this forums opinion is worth enough to warrant an entire thread about it, let alone mine.

 

[ralphc1]

Marriage foreplay is several hours of begging.

 

[Kframe]

Krrame, for one states that is wrong. You either both are or not simultaneously and any attempt to change the other is wrong and abuse.

It's abuse because you refused to respect her and her words. At best it was a pity fuck, at worst your a disgusting bully.

 

[snakedafunky]

Marriage foreplay is several hours of begging.

Lol yeah TS quickly changed his position from first-time sex with a new girl.
To now being married or in a relationship.
Obviously, it is a bit different when you are married.

 

[kahiljabroni]

Bunch of horse shit if u ask me

 

[Loiosh]

I lived with a girl who got really randy after midnight. This was fine on occasion, but I had to get up for work at four, and there are only so many times in a row you can have sex all night and hope to get any work done the next day. I started saying no, and she would get upset when I could not be, um, compelled to perform. Finally, I told her I'd be happy to have sex with her after midnight, but she would have to come to work at the same time as me (we worked in the same place).

 

[Amerikuracana]

This thread is clueless.

 

[MikeMcMann]

Yeah because you misrepresent here what you actually said.
You said when it comes to first time sex with a girl you have to be the aggressor because women like to submit to men.
And that sex is an ugly game.

At least keep it honest. You will have enough time spinning your behavior in front of a jury.
No reason to do it here.

If you want honest quote me as you are the one changing what I said.

What i have said is sex ie never black and white. Some girls CONVINCE guys and some guys CONVINCE girls and that can be ok and consensual. You cannot simply say any convincing is abuse or rape. ANd that is what makes sex inherently an ugly game to try and sit and judge as you are doing others relationships.

What you would say was rape or abuse many men and women would tell you was the start to a beautiful relationship where one persons desire and persistence won over the other person who was not at first sure but got convinced by the others passion.

So ya lets play honest.

 

[MikeMcMann]

I lived with a girl who got really randy after midnight. This was fine on occasion, but I had to get up for work at four, and there are only so many times in a row you can have sex all night and hope to get any work done the next day. I started saying no, and she would get upset when I could not be, um, compelled to perform. Finally, I told her I'd be happy to have sex with her after midnight, but she would have to come to work at the same time as me (we worked in the same place).

Did you feel that her trying to convince you and turn you on was abusive or wrong?

Not asking if you thought the timing was inconvenient but rather that her having a desire at the time you did not was abusive if she tried to convince you as Kframe and others are saying?

Your scenario is akin to my story where my gal was getting ready for the show and myself being all horned up over came her initial 'no, not now we are going out soon' objection and we ended up hacking super passionate crazy sex and missed most of the play.

Kframe is clear that that type of situation is clearly abusive since she said no initially and i had to win her over and get her horned up as well.

 

[CerebralKnievel]

Because I think that we should respect their words when they say No, i am triggered SJW? You are aware of the massive rape problem in America right? It's not masculine to coerce a woman to fuck you, its bullshit is what it is. Why would you want to fuck someone who really didn't want to be with you in the first place?

Wouldn't it be better if the partner actually wanted to be with you and it required no coercion? It's called clear and concise communication, both sexes need to learn it. Your yes should mean yes, and your no should mean no. No more of the games. Honest and frank communication by both the male and female should be the rule of our society, not dominance games by PUA's.

I don't know about you, but in my relationships, what brings me a sense of enjoyment is to be the one in charge (not in a manner relative to bullying or misused authority, but a sexual way). The women I tend to connect with enjoy "traditional gender roles." They like being slapped on the ass and told to hop their ass onto the bed. A little bit of control is fun. This doesnt mean that I don't admire and appreciate a woman giving me sass, being outspoken, and goofing around with one another. Mutual respect and boundaies are important to me.

You seem to confuse any hint of that exchange with literally forcing yourself on someone. Rest assured, I've never done this and never would.

And for the record, yes, your defensive and lengthy rant does reek of triggered pussy SJW to me, and your "no more of the games" line.... LOL! Are you sure you're even attracted to women?

 

[MikeMcMann]

Women have it easier. bout all they have to do to convince a man to have sex is undress.

women definitely have it easier but it is not always a sure thing.

As I said prior, with my ex wife when I had a company that was not performing and I would come home super stressed out and had trouble disconnecting from the work day she would often fuck me to 'pull me out of it'. She would often have to do all the work to change my mind set as that was simply not what I was looking for in that moment or wanted.

She would often joke after saying 'better now?'... 'ready to focus on me and forget your work day'.

 

[Loiosh]

Did you feel that her trying to convince you and turn you on was abusive or wrong?

Not asking if you thought the timing was inconvenient but rather that her having a desire at the time you did not was abusive if she tried to convince you as Kframe and others are saying?

Your scenario is akin to my story where my gal was getting ready for the show and myself being all horned up over came her initial 'no, not now we are going out soon' objection and we ended up hacking super passionate crazy sex and missed most of the play.

Kframe is clear that that type of situation is clearly abusive since she said no initially and i had to win her over and get her horned up as well.

Abusive? No. Selfish. Lack of sleep was obviously destroying me, I was a basket case. It was a control issue. She wasn't interested at nine PM, but after midnight, she had to have it. This was all a result of the fact she wasn't sure I... You know what? Too complicated to try and explain. It wasn't abusive. I could and did say "no".

 

[MikeMcMann]

Yeah, I see the difference. If two people have an established sexual rapport and it's just an 'eh I don't feel like it' not in the mood, vs. a real 'no', then in that case nagging can be harmlessly cute at worst, or at best turn to hot. As long as a person respects 'no' then I see no problem with it.

When a person who does not have that kind of relationship is just continually trying to get in the pants of someone who is clearly not interested, then it's a different creepy story.

Completely agree.

But would also add it can also apply to first time sex with someone that has been building with. I've had gals who you are getting close with but not quite sure you want to go there and their horniness and desire for you convinces you or vice versa. Just because a guy or girl says 'i am not sure I am ready yet' does not mean in the course of that evening you cannot change their mind.

Other person's horniness can be a real aphrodisiac and some like to suggest it creates pheromones. But whatever, if no one has ever convinced another or been convinced I am shocked. And the idea that simply trying to 'convince' someone is abuse is not something I will ever agree with. Sex is just not always that linear.

 

[MikeMcMann]

Why would anyone give anything @Kframe says enough thought to make a thread about it?

At first I was ignoring him in the other thread as I thought he was an 18 year old child which made sense based on his view of adult sexxuality. But then he got other support and i really got confused?