MMA Translator for Newbs

I wasn’t hurt = I couldn’t feel things
 
That’s an early candidate for fight of the year = that was a pretty good, reckless brawl we will forget about within the next month or two.

And the fight of the year goes to = a pretty good, reckless brawl that was fought within the last two months.
 
"The guy hits as hard as a Ford Escort from 1983 traveling 68mph" = "I really want this guy to win, hes cheap right now"
 
This is a next generation fighter = we’re really hoping this guy doesn’t lose to the next 4-5 stepping stones and gatekeepers we’re throwing at him because he seems promotable.
 
He didn’t make weight = he’s doing the Dolce diet
 
TheIrishPsycho said:
"Business as usual" translates to "Its not business as usual, massive changes are coming"

"It is what it is" translates to "I do not have a good answer for your question"

"Thats fucking illegal" translates to "That is perfectly legal, I am just upset at you"

"Nobody interests me at 155lbs" translates to "I am a coward and wish to duck legit contenders"

"I'm going to stand and trade and end it in the first" translates to "I'm going to wrestle you against the cage for 25 minutes"
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"business as usual' = we're gonna continue giving you watered down cards, and keep our cash cow protected
 
He/She is considering moving into acting = he/she will have 2-3 lines in a straight to TV movie about underground MMA with a 9% approval rating on rotten tomatoes.
 
Tale of the tape

6’2 = 3-5 inches shorter
 
HW = LHW who doesn’t like cardio.
 
"1,2, 5!!" = I smoke a lot of weed and I support any fighter who does too
 
It may be time for him to hang them up = he probably should have retired four years ago.
 
On the forums:

"I'm a lawyer!" = I can spell lawyer but not attorney and that's as much law as I know.
 
He’s destroying his legacy = his legacy is fine, he just lost a few fights at the end of an otherwise incredible career.
 
NHB7 said:
Look up at the big screen and walk us through the fight = let’s stand awkwardly silent for the next 20 seconds and say nothing.
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"Look up at the big screen and walk us through the fight"

Usually results in "First of all, I would like to thank Jesus Christ for giving me strength to KO this mother fucker."
 
In hindsight none of his wins count and I will explain why one-by-one in a massive thread = he was an awesome fighter, but I don’t like him, and yet I’m obsessed with him.
 
NHB7 said:
It may be time for him to hang them up = he probably should have retired four years ago.
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has 3 more fights and get KO'd in all of them but still fights after and is paid more than some better fighters
 
NHB7 said:
He’s destroying his legacy = his legacy is fine, he just lost a few fights at the end of an otherwise incredible career.
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he was never that good and just shows he fought cans and the new fighters are better.
 
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