GrandParents who were not affectionate to their own kids, but spoil their GrandKids

TidWell

TidWell

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My friend has a 10 year old, a 7 year old and a 3 year old Ive known him since high school and went with him to his eldest sons party at Chuckie Cheese, I brought my little cousin, and his pops was there and his mom

I remember his father was really strict, my friend used to cry to us saying his old man was mean, he would get on him if he messed up and all this stuff never praised him, wasn't affectionate at all. His mom was kinda cold too but not as cold both were strict they would spank them when they did wrong etc.

his pop is 73 years old and his mom is 70 now

And they spoil their grand kids, its weird, I saw the 7 year old spill something and my friend was upset and told him don't do that you spilled it his father says don't do that to the boy he is just a kid you are stressing him out, this was weird this man was cold blooded never smiled all of a sudden he is like a saint with his grand kids, the 10 year old plays sports and the grand pa is always telling him just do the best you can and thats good enough, yet with my friend he didn't speak to him when he missed a catch during our JV game.

His pops didn't console him and just gave him the cold shoulder the ride home

I even told my friend your old man is different now, is this the same guy?

why the change is it because they are older? why do some parents treat their grand kids better than their own kids?
 
Getting older helps people gain perspective of what’s really important
 
TidWell said:
My friend has a 10 year old, a 7 year old and a 3 year old Ive known him since high school and went with him to his eldest sons party at Chuckie Cheese, I brought my little cousin, and his pops was there and his mom

I remember his father was really strict, my friend used to cry to us saying his old man was mean, he would get on him if he messed up and all this stuff never praised him, wasn't affectionate at all. His mom was kinda cold too but not as cold both were strict they would spank them when they did wrong etc.

his pop is 73 years old and his mom is 70 now

And they spoil their grand kids, its weird, I saw the 7 year old spill something and my friend was upset and told him don't do that you spilled it his father says don't do that to the boy he is just a kid you are stressing him out, this was weird this man was cold blooded never smiled all of a sudden he is like a saint with his grand kids, the 10 year old plays sports and the grand pa is always telling him just do the best you can and thats good enough, yet with my friend he didn't speak to him when he missed a catch during our JV game.

His pops didn't console him and just gave him the cold shoulder the ride home

I even told my friend your old man is different now, is this the same guy?

why the change is it because they are older? why do some parents treat their grand kids better than their own kids?
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Less stress since you are basically retired and that your mortality is coming to an end. With working dads, they have to worry about work, mortages, thinking of their kids future etc so they aren't as mindful about their behavior
 
A grandkid is not your kid. Spoil them, then send them home to their parents.
 
They don't want their own kids to fuck up. Is your friend a loser?
 
My Dad remarried and had kids when I was 21.

I sat him and his wife down and told him, "Do not raise these children the way you raised us. Spoil them if you must."

The youngest one is 21 and a stud athlete (scholarship) with straight A's.

She was spoiled rotten and I'm thankful for it.
 
Old men become bitches when they get old because their bodies don't produce as much testosterone. That's why they take shit from little kids
 
Its a lot easier to love a kid that isnt in your house all day fucking up your shit
 
My dad is like that with my daughter. My whole life he has been pretty cold and unaffectionate towards me, and still is, but around my daughter he's like a completely different person. He plays with her, cuddles her, kisses her, spoils her and takes her on outings. Really weird.
 
Lights Out 101 said:
My dad is like that with my daughter. My whole life he has been pretty cold and unaffectionate towards me, and still is, but around my daughter he's like a completely different person. He plays with her, cuddles her, kisses her, spoils her and takes her on outings. Really weird.
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yeah, I think it has to do with being older an retired and not having that work stress.
 
I think it's your own job as a parent to play the asshole where necessary.

Grandparents have already had their turn, now it's yours.
 
Reminds me of my mother. They are grandparents. Quite frankly, its not their job to instill discipline. They had to do that for 18 years of their prime years, why would they want to do it at 70s to a kid that isn't theirs?
 
1. Because it's a parent's job to prepare your kids for the real world. So Grandparents can enjoy spending time with children without worrying about that part.

2. Because grandparents don't have to deal with the child after it gets spoiled.

3. Because parents are always with their kids, so time with them is less valuable because it is not scarce. Grandparents usually don't see the grandkids every day, so it's a special occasion when they do see them, AND they want to spoil them so the kids will want to visit more.

Plus all the other things said in this thread.
 
My father was very strict and emotionally distant, he was cold and mean sometimes too. Growing up felt like walking on egg shells. My siblings and I were good kids but we all got a few beatings regardless, I got the worst from him. When I was around 14 my parents finally divorced and a few months later my father started dating this woman, she got pregnant super quick and they had a son. I can't even explain how much my father changed with that kid. He is a great dad to him. It still kills me to see how my father treats and interacts with him. My half bro is having a great dad while I had a pos abusive dad, it's really not fucking fair.

He's an okay grandfather but he doesn't do much with the kids, most of his free time he spends with my half bro.
 
DataBreach said:
My Dad remarried and had kids when I was 21.

I sat him and his wife down and told him, "Do not raise these children the way you raised us. Spoil them if you must."

The youngest one is 21 and a stud athlete (scholarship) with straight A's.

She was spoiled rotten and I'm thankful for it.
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I don't understand this. Won't spoiling a kid result to a freeloader type?
 
SSgt Dickweed said:
I don't understand this. Won't spoiling a kid result to a freeloader type?
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I believe if the stock is good you can spoil them.

My dad was way too hard on us for no reason and he was wealthy.
 
SRN said:
My father was very strict and emotionally distant, he was cold and mean sometimes too. Growing up felt like walking on egg shells. My siblings and I were good kids but we all got a few beatings regardless, I got the worst from him. When I was around 14 my parents finally divorced and a few months later my father started dating this woman, she got pregnant super quick and they had a son. I can't even explain how much my father changed with that kid. He is a great dad to him. It still kills me to see how my father treats and interacts with him. My half bro is having a great dad while I had a pos abusive dad, it's really not fucking fair.

He's an okay grandfather but he doesn't do much with the kids, most of his free time he spends with my half bro.
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Thats bittersweet man, it must have hurt you good thing you were strong willed and didnt let it really get to you.
 
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