GrandParents who were not affectionate to their own kids, but spoil their GrandKids

[Emporio Alnino]

My father was very strict and emotionally distant, he was cold and mean sometimes too. Growing up felt like walking on egg shells. My siblings and I were good kids but we all got a few beatings regardless, I got the worst from him. When I was around 14 my parents finally divorced and a few months later my father started dating this woman, she got pregnant super quick and they had a son. I can't even explain how much my father changed with that kid. He is a great dad to him. It still kills me to see how my father treats and interacts with him. My half bro is having a great dad while I had a pos abusive dad, it's really not fucking fair.

He's an okay grandfather but he doesn't do much with the kids, most of his free time he spends with my half bro.

i feel for you dude.. my pops went through the same shit; my grandfather has always had some irrational dislike for him (possibly due to his mother dropping him off as an infant at my aunt's doorstep never to be seen again) but his younger siblings who have different mothers got treated like royalty. i don't understand how anyone could play favorites with their own seed like that. we get along well for the for the most part but getting older/more familiar with his true character i sometimes feel i can't be as accepting towards him because of that.

 

[TidWell]

i feel for you dude.. my pops went through the same shit; my grandfather has always had some irrational dislike for him (possibly due to his mother dropping him off as an infant at my aunt's doorstep never to be seen again) but his younger siblings who have different mothers got treated like royalty. i don't understand how anyone could play favorites with their own seed like that. we get along well for the for the most part but getting older/more familiar with his true character i sometimes feel i can't be as accepting towards him because of that.

The only thing you can take away is not to get jealous or bitter, my friend is happy he said he doesnt get mad that his pops was strict with him but loving to his grand kids he said it actually makes him happy because its better they are happy now then always being angry and mad like before.

 

[djacobox372]

My guess is that the grandparent probably has a lot of regret/guilt associated with how they raised their own kids, and this is how they're making up for it.

It also could be that they are no longer stressed so they don't have any needs to take it out on the kids. It also could be a case of them better coping with a problem like alcoholism. My Dad was like two different persons when he was on/off the wagon.

 

[Jim Cozad Jr.]

It's a different relationship...it's not the grandparents' job to raise and discipline the kids, that's the parents' job, so they never have to be the bad guy, just get to spoil them and send them back...and as a parent, if your kids don't dislike you at least once in a while, you're probably not doing a very good job...

 

[MoparOrNoCar]

My grandpa was an asshole to his kids but he took a liking to me as soon as I was born. I was always the favorite for no apparent reason. When I got older, my cousins used to be jealous because he would always help me out and do things for me but by that time I'd also spend a good amount of time with him while they couldn't be bothered with it. I'd go to lunch with him 3 Saturdays a month and talk to him on the phone a couple times a week. When he passed away he divided his things up between his kids but he also gave a special little kick back to me that he didn't tell anyone other than my mom about.

It was sort of like a Gran Torino situation. I'll miss him.

 

[Scerpi]

Sounds like most grandparents...

 

[xcvbn]

My situation is weird. My parents were awesome until they hated each other when I was around 10 years old. They both checked out completely. My mom brainwashed us kids into believing it was all my dads fault, all the while spending the $1k/month on the child support he always paid to her on anything but groceries. She was making $7k/month as well. When she kicked my siblings and I out around 14-17 years old my dad hesitated to even take us in. He did but continued being a raging alcoholic.

Fast forward 20 years or so and they're really no different. They just use their grandkids to continue taking out their problems on their kids. My mom is manipulative towards my oldest and my dad couldn't care less to be involved. This past year I decided I was done. No more Christmas cards. No phone calls for the holidays. Nothing. Save for them becoming homeless will I ever feel the need to contact them again.

Anyway, to go along with this thread I expected and hoped for my parents to do 180s with their grandkids. They didn't and it fucks me up because my kids, my nieces, and my nephews are fucking amazing all with bright futures but my siblings and I refuse to have them around role models like our parents.

 

[KONG-D'SNT-TAP]

Everyone I know who had hard ass parents who didn't buy them shit all hate their parents or have a cold relationship with them as adults.

The opposite side of the coin resulted in people who actually enjoy their parents.

 

[xcvbn]

Everyone I know who had hard ass parents who didn't buy them shit all hate their parents or have a cold relationship with them as adults.

The opposite side of the coin resulted in people who actually enjoy their parents.

Problem with my family is different. Half my childhood I grew up having everything I wanted- NES, all the newest toys, baseball, football, etc. Adolescence is when my parents gave up and literally left my siblings and I to raise ourselves/each other. In a fucked up way it helped make us decent adults and parents, but we often joke(sadistically) about how none of us are drug addicts, in jail, or sucking dick at truck stops.

 

[TidWell]

My situation is weird. My parents were awesome until they hated each other when I was around 10 years old. They both checked out completely. My mom brainwashed us kids into believing it was all my dads fault, all the while spending the $1k/month on the child support he always paid to her on anything but groceries. She was making $7k/month as well. When she kicked my siblings and I out around 14-17 years old my dad hesitated to even take us in. He did but continued being a raging alcoholic.

Fast forward 20 years or so and they're really no different. They just use their grandkids to continue taking out their problems on their kids. My mom is manipulative towards my oldest and my dad couldn't care less to be involved. This past year I decided I was done. No more Christmas cards. No phone calls for the holidays. Nothing. Save for them becoming homeless will I ever feel the need to contact them again.

Anyway, to go along with this thread I expected and hoped for my parents to do 180s with their grandkids. They didn't and it fucks me up because my kids, my nieces, and my nephews are fucking amazing all with bright futures but my siblings and I refuse to have them around role models like our parents.

your parents sound like they got that Foolish pride, the worst kind, the ones who refuse to be wrong and fight over little things.

 

[xcvbn]

your parents sound like they got that Foolish pride, the worst kind, the ones who refuse to be wrong and fight over little things.

Yeah it's bad. What's more is they'd rather air out our dirty laundry in holier-than-thou facebook posts than address us personally. And they get the sympathy they crave from doing so by their "friends."

I refuse to do the facebook shit, especially when it comes to personal and private matters.

 

[TidWell]

Yeah it's bad. What's more is they'd rather air out our dirty laundry in holier-than-thou facebook posts than address us personally. And they get the sympathy they crave from doing so by their "friends."

I refuse to do the facebook shit, especially when it comes to personal and private matters.

yeah its mental illness.

Seeking sympathy instead of accountability

You mostly see this in females they love telling people things to seek comfort, I had a lot of female coworkers tell me about their relationship problems I would tune them out at times, but they seemed to also tell other coworkers also repeating the same stuff bout their boyfriends or how their parents were mean, or this and that, seeking someone to tell them girl you aint wrong it aint your fault

It has to do with guilt, if you cannot handle guilt and refuse to change it sucks, you dont enjoy life its a mentall ilness basically

They feel dirty naked and weak if they were to admit they were wrong that foolish pride man

 

[LEWIS540]

My Dad remarried and had kids when I was 21.

I sat him and his wife down and told him, "Do not raise these children the way you raised us. Spoil them if you must."

The youngest one is 21 and a stud athlete (scholarship) with straight A's.

She was spoiled rotten and I'm thankful for it.

Pics of stud athlete half-sister?

 

[DataBreach]

Pics of stud athlete half-sister?

No can do bud.

Nice join date.

 

[LEWIS540]

No can do bud.

Nice join date.

Fuck me, almost 16 years........2nd account, too!

 

[Necromantic]

My friend has a 10 year old, a 7 year old and a 3 year old Ive known him since high school and went with him to his eldest sons party at Chuckie Cheese, I brought my little cousin, and his pops was there and his mom

I remember his father was really strict, my friend used to cry to us saying his old man was mean, he would get on him if he messed up and all this stuff never praised him, wasn't affectionate at all. His mom was kinda cold too but not as cold both were strict they would spank them when they did wrong etc.

his pop is 73 years old and his mom is 70 now

And they spoil their grand kids, its weird, I saw the 7 year old spill something and my friend was upset and told him don't do that you spilled it his father says don't do that to the boy he is just a kid you are stressing him out, this was weird this man was cold blooded never smiled all of a sudden he is like a saint with his grand kids, the 10 year old plays sports and the grand pa is always telling him just do the best you can and thats good enough, yet with my friend he didn't speak to him when he missed a catch during our JV game.

His pops didn't console him and just gave him the cold shoulder the ride home

I even told my friend your old man is different now, is this the same guy?

why the change is it because they are older? why do some parents treat their grand kids better than their own
kids?

If you are going to use "pop" can you at least use it correctly? It is moms and pops. No one just says "pop" unless it is some old fart referencing soda.

And please don't refer to children as "kids". It makes them sound like goats.

Edit: My conclusion yesterday is even more solid....

i feel for you dude.. my pops went through the same shit;

See, this guy knows how to use "pops".

No can do bud.

Nice join date.

upskirt???
I'm getting desperate now.

Fuck me, almost 16 years........2nd account, too!

As long as you are the power bottom it is a dinner date.

 

[TidWell]

If you are going to use "pop" can you at least use it correctly? It is moms and pops. No one just says "pop" unless it is some old fart referencing soda.

And please don't refer to children as "kids". It makes them sound like goats.

Edit: My conclusion yesterday is even more solid....




See, this guy knows how to use "pops".



upskirt???
I'm getting desperate now.



As long as you are the power bottom it is a dinner date.

You are a creepy fellow. I don't even know you, man.

 

[Necromantic]

You are a creepy fellow. I don't even know you, man.

Not as creepy as you going over a whole cuck fantasy in the war room when you were pretending you were black, remember? You set the high watermark for creepiness. You shattered Ender's creepiness.


I think you need to cut down on the creepetin, my brotha.

 

[Liquid Smoke]

That's what grand parents are for.

 

[TidWell]

Not as creepy as you going over a whole cuck fantasy in the war room when you were pretending you were black, remember? You set the high watermark for creepiness. You shattered Ender's creepiness.


I think you need to cut down on the creepetin, my brotha.

A guy who calls himself necromancer calling someone else creepy...okay

Im sorry I ddint mean to get under your skin, signed fake black man

and Soulman was a pretty good movie