GrandParents who were not affectionate to their own kids, but spoil their GrandKids

Discussion in 'Mayberry Lounge' started by TidWell, Jan 11, 2018.

  1. Emporio Alnino

    Emporio Alnino only the results!

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    he who bears light exists in the deepest shadow
    i feel for you dude.. my pops went through the same shit; my grandfather has always had some irrational dislike for him (possibly due to his mother dropping him off as an infant at my aunt's doorstep never to be seen again) but his younger siblings who have different mothers got treated like royalty. i don't understand how anyone could play favorites with their own seed like that. we get along well for the for the most part but getting older/more familiar with his true character i sometimes feel i can't be as accepting towards him because of that.
     
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  2. TidWell

    TidWell Silver Belt

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    The only thing you can take away is not to get jealous or bitter, my friend is happy he said he doesnt get mad that his pops was strict with him but loving to his grand kids he said it actually makes him happy because its better they are happy now then always being angry and mad like before.
     
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  3. djacobox372

    djacobox372 Gold Belt

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    My guess is that the grandparent probably has a lot of regret/guilt associated with how they raised their own kids, and this is how they're making up for it.

    It also could be that they are no longer stressed so they don't have any needs to take it out on the kids. It also could be a case of them better coping with a problem like alcoholism. My Dad was like two different persons when he was on/off the wagon.
     
  4. Jim Cozad Jr.

    Jim Cozad Jr. Brown Belt

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    It's a different relationship...it's not the grandparents' job to raise and discipline the kids, that's the parents' job, so they never have to be the bad guy, just get to spoil them and send them back...and as a parent, if your kids don't dislike you at least once in a while, you're probably not doing a very good job...
     
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  5. MoparOrNoCar

    MoparOrNoCar Brown Belt

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    My grandpa was an asshole to his kids but he took a liking to me as soon as I was born. I was always the favorite for no apparent reason. When I got older, my cousins used to be jealous because he would always help me out and do things for me but by that time I'd also spend a good amount of time with him while they couldn't be bothered with it. I'd go to lunch with him 3 Saturdays a month and talk to him on the phone a couple times a week. When he passed away he divided his things up between his kids but he also gave a special little kick back to me that he didn't tell anyone other than my mom about.

    It was sort of like a Gran Torino situation. I'll miss him.
     
  6. Scerpi

    Scerpi Black Belt

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    Sounds like most grandparents...
     
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  7. xcvbn

    xcvbn Silver Belt Platinum Member

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    My situation is weird. My parents were awesome until they hated each other when I was around 10 years old. They both checked out completely. My mom brainwashed us kids into believing it was all my dads fault, all the while spending the $1k/month on the child support he always paid to her on anything but groceries. She was making $7k/month as well. When she kicked my siblings and I out around 14-17 years old my dad hesitated to even take us in. He did but continued being a raging alcoholic.

    Fast forward 20 years or so and they're really no different. They just use their grandkids to continue taking out their problems on their kids. My mom is manipulative towards my oldest and my dad couldn't care less to be involved. This past year I decided I was done. No more Christmas cards. No phone calls for the holidays. Nothing. Save for them becoming homeless will I ever feel the need to contact them again.

    Anyway, to go along with this thread I expected and hoped for my parents to do 180s with their grandkids. They didn't and it fucks me up because my kids, my nieces, and my nephews are fucking amazing all with bright futures but my siblings and I refuse to have them around role models like our parents.
     
  8. KONG-D'SNT-TAP

    KONG-D'SNT-TAP Titanium Belt

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    Everyone I know who had hard ass parents who didn't buy them shit all hate their parents or have a cold relationship with them as adults.

    The opposite side of the coin resulted in people who actually enjoy their parents.
     
  9. xcvbn

    xcvbn Silver Belt Platinum Member

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    Problem with my family is different. Half my childhood I grew up having everything I wanted- NES, all the newest toys, baseball, football, etc. Adolescence is when my parents gave up and literally left my siblings and I to raise ourselves/each other. In a fucked up way it helped make us decent adults and parents, but we often joke(sadistically) about how none of us are drug addicts, in jail, or sucking dick at truck stops.
     
  10. TidWell

    TidWell Silver Belt

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    your parents sound like they got that Foolish pride, the worst kind, the ones who refuse to be wrong and fight over little things.
     
  11. xcvbn

    xcvbn Silver Belt Platinum Member

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    Yeah it's bad. What's more is they'd rather air out our dirty laundry in holier-than-thou facebook posts than address us personally. And they get the sympathy they crave from doing so by their "friends."

    I refuse to do the facebook shit, especially when it comes to personal and private matters.
     
  12. TidWell

    TidWell Silver Belt

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    yeah its mental illness.

    Seeking sympathy instead of accountability

    You mostly see this in females they love telling people things to seek comfort, I had a lot of female coworkers tell me about their relationship problems I would tune them out at times, but they seemed to also tell other coworkers also repeating the same stuff bout their boyfriends or how their parents were mean, or this and that, seeking someone to tell them girl you aint wrong it aint your fault

    It has to do with guilt, if you cannot handle guilt and refuse to change it sucks, you dont enjoy life its a mentall ilness basically

    They feel dirty naked and weak if they were to admit they were wrong that foolish pride man
     
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  13. LEWIS540

    LEWIS540 .

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    Pics of stud athlete half-sister?
     
  14. DataBreach

    DataBreach Cocaine Fueled Decision Making Belt

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    No can do bud.

    Nice join date.
     
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  15. LEWIS540

    LEWIS540 .

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    Fuck me, almost 16 years........2nd account, too!
     
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  16. Necromantic

    Necromantic Stabbing Banned

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    If you are going to use "pop" can you at least use it correctly? It is moms and pops. No one just says "pop" unless it is some old fart referencing soda.

    And please don't refer to children as "kids". It makes them sound like goats.

    Edit: My conclusion yesterday is even more solid....



    See, this guy knows how to use "pops".

    upskirt???
    I'm getting desperate now.

    As long as you are the power bottom it is a dinner date.
     
  17. TidWell

    TidWell Silver Belt

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    You are a creepy fellow. I don't even know you, man.
     
  18. Necromantic

    Necromantic Stabbing Banned

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    Not as creepy as you going over a whole cuck fantasy in the war room when you were pretending you were black, remember? You set the high watermark for creepiness. You shattered Ender's creepiness.


    I think you need to cut down on the creepetin, my brotha.


    [​IMG]
     
  19. Liquid Smoke

    Liquid Smoke Great artists steal™

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    That's what grand parents are for.
     
  20. TidWell

    TidWell Silver Belt

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    A guy who calls himself necromancer calling someone else creepy...okay

    Im sorry I ddint mean to get under your skin, signed fake black man

    and Soulman was a pretty good movie
     

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